Starshine | Teen Ink

Starshine

January 26, 2018
By Anonymous

There’s a special thing about love that most don’t understand. When you find your true love you know it. Something clicks in your mind and you just know. You will go through so much with them. The good, the bad, and the dirty but for some reason they stay around. This is the story of my true love and I. My starshine.

It was a Saturday morning when I got the call. Something everybody will hear one day but no one really wants to hear. I was being let go from my job. My first job. I have kept this steady job for almost two years now. Never been late or skipped work. I just didn’t understand why I was being let go. And that’s when it all started. Everything went downhill from there.

I remember sitting down at the dinner table that night with my family and my girlfriend, Whitney. Telling them how hurt I was that I was being let go. Of course they said they were going to be with me and that they would help me through my struggle but I could still tell that something was off. It wasn’t the food, it wasn’t the people, it was more the setting. Something seemed off about the vibe in my home and I couldn’t seem to figure out what it was and it was driving me insane. We talked for what seemed like hours about graduation and moving off after high school. I was saving money so that i wouldn’t have to live with my parents after high school but now that i had lost my job I would have to use that money for things like gas and food.

My family has struggled with money for a long time and I didn't want to go down that path and then it seems inevitable. But now without my job I could focus on school and graduating on time. My girlfriend tended to slack in that department. With her depression quickly worsening, it was harder for her to do the simple things, like getting out of bed and showering. She had stopped doing school work or even going to school at all. I began to worry, as any good human being would. She was my starshine and I didn't want her to fade. I didn't know if I was making it better or worse by helping her. She used to get so angry when I would open her curtains for her after I got back from school. But her worsening depression wasn't the worst part.

I remember the day I found out we would have to move. That day must have been the worst day of my life. I came home from Whitney’s house and my parents weren't home. I was excited because the only time I can have time to myself is when the aren't home. I opened up the family computer to work on my essay for english and at first I didn't understand. Cheap homes in Ohio. How much is the average rent in Ohio. Zillow.com. Easy ways to sell your home for more than it’s worth. I didn't know what was going on. I had too many emotions and thoughts going through my head so in a fit of rage I slammed the keyboard on the desk. Selling our home. The home I grew up in. The home I wanted to raise my family with Whitney in. Whitney. I couldn't leave her in the state of mind she was in. She would spontaneously combust.

I can still see the tears running down my mother's face when I asked her what was going on and told her how upset I was that they didn't tell me what was going on. My mother was a stay at home mom all her life and my dad was an attorney. Business was getting difficult for him. He was pulling in less and less clients. My mother had to get a job. I didn't think much of it at the time, I was too focused on other things. We all sat down with each other and cried for a while. It was hard for me to capture that we would be leaving the house I learned to love.

Whitney. That poor girl. She didn't understand as much as I didnt. It was too much for her. I knew what would happen when I told her. There was a lot of loud sobbing and scream crying. No matter how many times I told her I would visit her and much as I could she just couldn't stop obsessing over the fact that I wouldn't be there for her anymore. She stayed in bed for days. I slept beside her on her floor because I was too worried about her doing something that she would regret. On the third day of her lying in bed she sat up and spoke.
“ I am going to do everything I can to graduate before you leave.” She got up, put her hair up and got to work. I was so proud of her. When she had trouble she would ask me for help and i would get her things like water and food when she needed them. All she needed was a little determination. My little starshine, had finally stopped fading.

Graduation was two weeks before we had to move. She only had one class left to finish and I just knew something would happen to get in the way. Her cat Hansen, didn't come home. She was heartbroken. She again stopped eating and working. She couldn't afford to stop working all of a sudden, but she did. It took her a couple days to get back on her rhythm but she did it. She had finished her last class with not a day to spare.

Graduation week was a mess. While everyone was running around trying to find dresses and tuxes, Whitney and I were packing our things up getting ready for the move. We did not attend graduation because we were simply too busy. We received our diplomas in the mail a week after graduation had taken place. For some reason again she stopped dead in her tracks, which was fine because we had finished everything we needed to do. Her parents didn't mind her moving with me because she had finished school. She just stopped.

One week left. We had one week left until we moved to our house in Ohio. A beautiful house with plenty of land for as many animals as we wanted. It was perfect. That week everything went as planned. Whitney was back to herself and everything was great.

In the end everything worked out. Whitney and I have lived a happy life in Ohio and are expecting our first child in a few months now. I got a new job and my dad is pulling in new clients like its nothing. It was silly of me to be worried about moving here. But I'm glad everything worked out.


The author's comments:

I am 16 and i have been writing for 5 years now. This piece was inspired by my life.


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