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The Break Up -- Chapter 1
I stared at the algebra book with a blank expression. Algebra was the last thing on my mind. I just couldn?t stop thinking about him. I had to stop thinking of him. I needed to clear my head. What was wrong with me? He found someone else, yet he still clouded my thoughts. I decided to take a walk. I needed some air.
The park was surprisingly empty for the sunny day. There were only a few a joggers and a couple on one of the park benches.
This instantly reminded me of yesterday afternoon. That was when Mark took me here. He said we needed to talk and instantly I knew it wasn?t going to end well. We sat down on a bench and he told me there was someone else. He never actually said he cheated on me, but I?m not an idiot. Taking a walk was a bad idea. A very bad idea. This was suppose to help forgot about him not make me remember my heartache.
I looked forward to school like I looked forward to getting teeth pulled. Actually I would have preferred getting my teeth pulled. How was I supposed to tell my friends Mark, the guy I thought I loved, dumped me? How could I stand seeing him in class? In the halls? I couldn?t face having to see Mark with his new girlfriend. Whoever she might be. There was no possibility of my mom letting me transfer schools. I would have to bear school with the remnants of my dignity.
I made my way through the joggers and started back to the apartment. By the time I got back it was still only two. My mom wouldn?t be home from her shift for another three hours.
My mother worked seven days a week to support the two of us. My dad broke up her when she became pregnant with me at age seventeen. I sometimes blamed myself for them breaking up and wondered if her life would be better if they had stayed together and I hadn?t been born. Me and mother both agreed that her life wouldn?t have been better if she had stayed with the creep who would knock up a girl and then leave her.
I had never met my father nor did I plan on it. He left us. This was not something I could forgive him for. He just left my mother to raise a child single-handedly having to work seven days a week to support herself and her child. Never once in sixteen years did he offer to pay child support or try to see me.
I was starting to think all guys were cruel and vicious. Was they?re not one man on this planet who was not malignant? Walt Disney and his story characters were the only ones who came to mind. Would I ever meet my prince charming? Was there no happy ending for me?
I decided to use my new found free time to study. Who needs to spend time with a boyfriend when you could enhance your intelligence? I didn?t have time for a boyfriend. I needed to spend time studying for midterms.
Who was I kidding? I was pathetic to try to study when I felt like Mark had stolen my heart and stamped on it. How could he do this to me? After all we went through he just went and found another girl. It felt like he had kicked me in the gut. Was there something wrong with me? I didn?t have the best grades, but I was a decent person, pretty cute, fun to be around. What could this other girl have that I didn?t?
Somewhere between the studying and thinking of Mark time flew. It was already four forty-five. My mother would be home soon and I still had to cook dinner. I pulled out the ingredients and focused all my energy on making the spaghetti. If I thought completely about the spaghetti I wouldn?t be able to think about Mark.
At exactly five fifteen my mother appeared through our tiny apartment door. ?Hello offspring,? she greeted me.
?Hi mom,? I said back as I set the plates on the table. ?How was your shift??
?Boring, as usual,? she said as she sat down and started eating. The remainder of the meal was spent in silence. She noticed my unusual quitness, ?Is something wrong??
? No, I?m just tired. I?ve been cramming for midterms next week. I think I?m just gonna head off to bed.? I said standing up. I took my plate to the sink than headed toward my door. As I entered I couldn?t help but to check my messages before I went to bed. Had he called? Nope. I slowly crawled into bed. Well, his loss, I thought as I awaited the dreaded morning.