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And Life Goes On

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I sat in the taxi fidgeting the tule under my gown and thinking I’d rather be home in my flannel pajamas, instead of leaving my wedding with no husband at all. Yes, it is the absolute worst thing in the world, I know but I had always expected the worst thing to happen during my wedding day. Yet, being left at the altar was something I never thought of, and it was ten times worse than what I thought was going to be bad. Walking down the aisle has always been my big dream, ever since I was six years old. Just imagining a huge princess gown, graciously walking down a church aisle, everyone staring in awe of how beautiful I looked, and at the end of the aisle all I could see was the man of my dreams, Jax. Now sitting in the back of a taxi, driving back to my house after, truly, the worst day of my life, I regretted falling in love with Jax, and everything leading up to the wedding day, I had always noticed that he was such a flirt, but I never thought anything of it, until now of course. I wished for this day to have never come.
As the taxi dropped me off at my loft, I quickly ran inside and got into my flannel pajamas, all while crying. I got into my, what seemed like, huge empty bed, I curled into a ball and just thought, what had I done wrong? When and where did everything turn south? Will I ever be able to find another man who will truly love me?
As the next two days passed, I only got up to use the bathroom and get food. Other than that, I was bed bound and had no motivation to do anything.  I laid in my very much empty bed and watched every season of Pretty Little Liars, and ate Ben and Jerry’s ice cream. Finally my best friend, Carmen called,
“Time to get up!! Be there at noon” she shouted. She was always the one person to be overly optimistic and happy about everything. No matter what happened she always seemed to cheer me up. But not today, today nothing could make me happy. I groaned into the phone and then hung up. I knew if I told her no, she would just come over, and drag me out of the bed, forcing me to go out. For the next hour I slowly got out of bed and got dressed into baggy sweat pants and a huge sweatshirt. As I was putting on the sweatshirt I began to remember Jax, I remembered all the times he would make me laugh from the smallest things, or how he would make me feel like the most special girl in the world, then I started to think about what he had done to me and how he had left me for another girl, not only just left me but left me on our wedding day, and I slowly began to take it off. Yet, something held me back from taking it off, so what Jax left me, that was part of the past. I had to move on. At noon, sharp, Carmen rang my doorbell. I quickly opened the door, and Carmen’s expression went from being like a statue to as if she was on a roller coaster.
“ You are up and ready?! I thought I would have had to drag you out of your bed,” Carmen shouted. All I did was laugh, the kind of laugh that seems fake but it is actually genuine and just shrugged at her. Carmen grabbed my hand and pulled me out the door to our favorite burger joint . As I left my loft, a huge weight felt as if it was lifted off my heart. Jax, or no Jax, I was going to be just fine with the good people in my life.






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