Too You.

May 15, 2017
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I tremble like a leaf, head in my hands.
No tears.
No sobbing.
Just holding myself.
You knew it was fair game, I was fair game. It only took a minute to take advantage of it.
I can’t blame you either, I did this too myself.
I created the weather in this storm.
I was once a happy go-lucky child now i’m petrified.
It was a kiss goodbye to my normal life, and a hello to a place far and wide.
Away from society.
I wrote you into my life, can I erase you?
No. This has shaped me into myself.
I should thank you.
On my own account I should thank you.
You act like i’m dumb,
I know your intentions.
I wasn’t born yesterday you know?
While you live easy, I live with the fear you’ve left.
It’s perfection really, a perfect fear.
Growing stronger over me, better by day.
Constantly watching over me, as I grow older.
How can I dream of touching the stars if those words hold me here?
There’s hard choices, and soft options.
I could allow it to make music with me,
Music so deep to me that nobody could imagine the true meaning of it.
The fear could love me, like that of a rose.
Beautiful to look at, but harmful to touch.
I refuse to let you take my happiness.
I forgive you, no grudge, no hatred.
I forgive you.
Now I can start brand new, away from the painful memories,
branded into my skin from you. 

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