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There are no Rainbows Without the Rain

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“DRIP” “DRIP” This is the sound of the rain turning a sunny day dark, and a dry one wet. “SWOOSH” This is the sound of the car that drove past me and soaked me to the bone. “SPLASH” SPLASH” “SPLASH” This is the sound of my footsteps as they race across the concrete roads, away from all my troubles. I arrive home and am out of breath, I step inside and the dryness of the house almost calms me, but the rain doesn’t stop. It’s inside my head. The door shuts behind my and my eyes swell up with tears. “No,” I quietly say to myself, “I must not let them see me cry.” From the kitchen I hear my mother singing to herself, and from the office I hear the slow click of the keys from father’s work computer. My 4 younger siblings have no interest in me so I quietly go up to my room.  I try to concentrate on the load of homework I have, but it’s back and stronger than before. The rain, the sounds in my head.  I must fight it; I must be strong.  I have to find my escape… I reach for my headphones and my old MP3 player which has all of my music. As soon as the sounds fill my ears I know I am safe, I know I am home.
I suddenly hear a knock on my door, it’s my brother Joe telling me dinner is ready. I tell him I will be down in a couple of minutes. I gradually get up from my desk, and go and take a shower. I just want to wash this whole day away. I then change into the most comfortable clothes I can find, sweatpants and my old beaten up Beatles shirt. I then briskly walk downstairs to get this family interaction over with.  During dinner we talk about the boring stuff, “How is school?” and “Got any tests coming up?” I ask to excuse myself before anyone else, and of course reluctantly my parents let me go. As soon as I get to my room I look at my phone, and see that I have 10 unread messages. I scroll through them and see they are all from my friends who were worried about me. They always know when my day has been rough, and I love them for that. I reply and tell them I’m fine. But am I really? I put my headphones in my ears and am immediately transported to another world, a fictional world that I wish could be my reality.  The rain has died down a little so the nightmares and delusions don’t haunt me. I close my eyes and for once see something happy, a rainbow. I drift to sleep with my headphones in my ears and the sweet hum of my music lulling me to sleep. I realize that life may not be perfect but as long as I have music, family, and friends it will be good, and that’s more than I could ever ask for. But some things have changed, like my hope, which is like a rainbow, it shines brighter than before, and is only there due to the rain.






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