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Just Like in the Movies

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You think your first kiss will be perfect.  It’ll be a fairytale moment: true love’s kiss.  Or it’ll be in super slow motion.  You both lean in, heads tilted at the perfect angle.  Your lips will meet, and sparks will fly.  Or you’ll both be staring at each other for a few moments before, magically at the same time, you both lean in and your lips crash together in the world’s most passionate embrace.  Or maybe it will be in the rain.  After your first perfect date, you’ll both run with your jackets held above your head to totally not block out any rain.  You make it to your doorstep.  You’re both laughing because you’re both soaking wet.  Then, still laughing, you kiss.
But, no.  It won’t be like that.
It’ll be the summer after your senior year of high school.  It’ll be way over-due, in your mind.  After over a year of liking this person, you finally find out he likes you back during your senior year.  He’ll still be in a relationship.  But, he likes you too, he says.  He wants to break up with her. He won’t, though.  You tell him that it’s not fair to her.  She doesn’t deserve to have her boyfriend talk behind her back about wanting to break up with her.  She doesn’t deserve to still be led on by him, even though he’s not really in it anymore.  She’s a nice girl.  You like her.  She’s too good for him.  You’re too good for him, and you know this.
But, you’ll still keep trying.  Waiting.
Finally he’ll break up with her.  In the same breath he’ll tell you that he doesn’t know if he still likes you.  You back off.
He’s still one of your best friends.  You still have to see him every day at lunch.  You have to hear your other friend talk about how he’s with someone new.  You have to hear him talk about what a great person she is and how much she means to him.  Then you find out he’s been playing everyone.  He’s been talking to more than one girl.  You find out he was talking to someone besides you behind his girlfriend’s back.  Then everybody starts to dislike him.  Your friends all talk about what an awful person he is.  You agree.  He hurt you.
You’ll start talking to him again during the summer.  You’ll decide to start a relationship on Friday.  On Saturday, you’ll find out he’s moving across the country.  On Monday, you’ll go on a date.  You’ll walk around the mall.  You won’t hold hands.  It won’t feel like you’re together.
After a disappointing “date,” you’ll get in his car so he can take you home.  You’re almost shaking.  You know it’s going to happen.  He’ll lean over the console of the car and he’ll kiss you.  It’ll be weird.  You don’t know what you’re doing.  It’s awkward.  He just ate pasta with alfredo sauce.  You’re in his car, where the air smells stale.  You don’t know if the kiss was good or not.  He’ll drive you home and kiss you again before you get out of the car.  You’ll go inside and text your best friends to tell them that it finally happened. 
On Thursday, he’ll break up with you.  You’ll have known it was coming.  It won’t hurt you as much as it should.  You’ll regret kissing him.  You’re too good for him.  You deserve a better first kiss than him.  But, that’ll be what happens.  Your first kiss won’t be like in a fairytale.  Your first kiss won’t be like in the movies.




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