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She absolutely could not comprehend the life shattering words her parents had just told her. So much was going through her mind. She felt sick to her stomach. The knots inside were slowly getting tighter. She thought, how could her parents be so O.K. with just turning her entire world inside out? She went to sleep thinking she would have a normal day. How could have she possibly changed the outcome of this harsh reality, but who would have guessed this was coming. Her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of her father's voice.
“Helloooo, earth to Victoria,” her father said while waving his hands in front of her face.
“What are you guys even talking about?” She kept the tears down since the beginning. She told herself over and over. This is not real. It's a joke. My parents would never do this to me.
“Victoria, please just hear us out. We want to explain it all to you, so take a deep breath and have a seat honey.” ,her mother said with a reassuring smile.
“Okay.. the reason for completely turning my world upside down in a matter of 5 minutes better be good.” Her reply was calm, but inside it was like someone took her heart and ripped it to pieces. It was so hard for her swallow and pretend to be perfectly fine to her parents.
“Vic, we love you we truly do, but it's time for a change in this house.Your father and I have decided we want to start fresh somewhere new where no one knows us or our past.This may be very hard for you to understand, but we have a few weeks before we are actually packing up and leaving.We just wanted to let you know, so it wasn’t a complete shock.” How could her mother actually think that this was better and wouldn't cause her pain and shock. The disbelief in her eyes went unnoticed by her mother.
“How is this not a complete shock? You are uplifting me from my friends and school, just so you can forget the mistakes you made. I get that you want to live the life where it is so simple and no one knows you or your past, but stop letting your bad decisions affect my life.” I can’t see why she thinks this is so O.K.
“Honey, it's going to be okay just trust me. Breathe, we understand this a huge change in your life seeing how it is the beginning of your senior year but this change is just for the better. We hope you can understand that and just move through this together.”,her mother tried to console her at least somewhat.
“This is honestly going to suck; everyone judges the new kid. Everyone knows that Mom. Somehow some way I’ll be judged for just being myself or different than the rest. I’m trying to understand your side of this whole mess you are creating, but it's not your life being drastically changed. I want to spend my senior year with my best friends not some new kids who don’t even know me. Why couldn't you do this after my senior year when I was already moving to a different location and going to college? That would be the perfect thing for me, but it doesn't matter how I feel.. I'm sorry Mom and Dad. I'm not the perfect child, I never will be. I can't just accept this. I can't tell you this is perfectly O.K. because it's not. I wish I could just let it all go and be happy about this it's going to take awhile before I even think about being happy about this. I love you guys, you have never left me feeling like I had the worst parents in the world. But right now when I look you in the eye all I feel is my stomach being punched as hard as possible.” she couldn’t hold back the tears anymore, they slowly streamed down her stone cold facial expression. All her mother could do, was hold her so tight to her that she could feel her daughter slowly start to shake while the tears dampened her generic shirt.
Finally, the dreadful day had reached her, after 3 full weeks after finding out that her life was about to change she still felt so sick. The only thing she ever wanted was to graduate in her hometown with all of her close friends and classmates. After packing for the past week the house was as empty as she felt. No matter how sick and horrible she felt about this situation, seeing her mom be sad and disappointed made her feel worse then ever before; nothing could top that feeling. So she told herself over and over throughout the whole 3 weeks keep strong, you are doing this for your mom's happiness which will forever make you happy one day.
“Hey Vic, start loading the moving truck. Now it may take a few days to get settled in but luckily I have already set up your whole schooling situation. Since it is already Wednesday night depending how long it takes to unpack will determine what day you back to shadow someone at your new school.” ,her dad said with a softened smile on his normally stone cold face.
“Alright dad, I will soon.” her smile made it seem like she was finally happy about the move, but inside she was still feeling the twisting and turning of her stomach. While grabbing all the boxes into the moving truck standing in her room for the last time ever she pushed her back against the wall. Slowly sliding down the cold wall made a shiver go through her entire body creating a feeling she never had felt before. Laying on this cold wall looking around her empty room made her feel the hot tears stream down her face to contrast the empty and cold feeling she had felt ever since the day she was given the news that they were moving. Her being alone to finally realize what was happening was short lived when her dad yelled in to tell her it was time to go. Over the course of unpacking and getting settled felt like an eternity to her, but in reality only took 4 days. Sunday went by like the blink of an eye for her it was 8:00 and she realized that she had to get ready for bed and face a new school the next morning which gave her so much anxiety. After finally being ready to just sleep so she could stop thinking so much she felt like she couldn't sleep. Many attempts to fall asleep and they all seemingly failed. All she could do was sleep it was like she couldn't turn her mind off at all wishing there was just a simple flick of a switch. When morning came she was awoken by her mother saying these terrible words.
“Get up Victoria you have a new school to attend to now isn't that just exciting.” her mother's cheery expression made her even more sarcastic than usual.
“O.K. mom I get it, I'll be down in a bit and oh yeah of course this so exciting.” she said with a half smile tied with the rolling of her eyes hidden by her blanket. After forcing herself out of bed walking down the stairs as slowly as possible seeming as if she were a sloth.
“Victoria just get down here so you have time to eat and get ready so you aren't late to your new school.” her dad yelled up the stairs.
“Dad I’m right here you don't have to yell. All I have to do is eat and go back up and get dressed and put some makeup on so I don't look dead.” she said with a slightly annoyed tone.
“Fine just hurry up. I don't want you to look bad your first day there.” her dad tried to say with a reasoning tone. She didn't want to argue anymore so she simply gave her dad a half smile. After eating she walked all the way back upstairs to find an outfit she liked. Finding some jeans and a “cute” top she was finally dressed. She wanted to look decent, so she put makeup on, and walked back down the what seemed to be millions of stairs after she said goodbye to her parents. Walking out into the brisk morning air and breathing the air in gave her a sense of relief. She thought to herself over and over today will be a good day as long as you just believe that. Walking into the new strange building it looked huge compared to her old school. The foreign building was called Western Tech High School. She walked in and found the office after looking for at least 5 minutes. The office lady called down a girl named Jazmyn Jones. The strange girl walked in seemingly too cheery for Monday morning.
“Hello, I’m Jazmyn I will be the person you are shadowing today. I will make your first day a breeze. Don’t be nervous I know it's a new school but you have me.” Jazmyn's smile made her feel so uneasy.
“Um okay.. Thanks?” her response showed to be unnoticed by Jazmyn. After a tour with Jazmyn she met some new people who were equally really nice to her and she wondered to herself why aren't these people noticing I'm not like them. I want to be noticed that I'm different because that's what makes me unique. Everyone was complimenting her and being so kind what was going on in this school.
“What is happening here? Why is no one being mean and judging me and what I’m wearing? That's what happens all the time it's normal to me. I assumed I would be because I'm the new girl and I'm not like everyone else.” her confusion was getting worse.
“What are you talking about? You are not different, you are just like everyone in this school. You look normal no one is different we are the same. I don't get your confusion.” Jazmyn replied with smile.
“ But I am different. I don't look like you at all. None of us are the same. Everyone is unique and that's perfectly fine. I like being myself, and being my own person. I just thought at least someone would have said something to me because I am different and have quirks. So stop telling me I am like you and we are all the same because we aren't.” her response was slowly showing how scared she was becoming. More and more people started to surround her to figure out what the commotion was. Once the people around her figured out what was going on, they started to say to her the same as Jazmyn saying simultaneously YOU AREN'T SPECIAL YOU ARE JUST LIKE EVERYONE ELSE IN THIS SCHOOL. Her thoughts were all messed up and controlling her. She had to say something to these people. She was going crazy with all the words being said to her.
“I am different leave me alone please. Just go away Im begging you…” she couldn't think anymore it was all too much. She slowly felt her back hitting the lockers she felt if she could just sit and cover her face it would all just stop, Time would stop she could go back and live her normal life finishing out high school with her family. All she could do was stand there and take it tears streaming down her face. Closing her eyes tight, once she finally opened them everyone seemed to start to disappear and fade away. She couldn't believe what was happening was she truly going insane. She thought to herself maybe if I close my eyes one more time it will just disappear for good. Once her eyes had finally opened, she looked around, and it gave her the feeling of a weight being lifted off her shoulders. Sitting up she took a deep breath and just smiled knowing the horrible nightmare was completely over.