The greatest excuse in the world | Teen Ink

The greatest excuse in the world

April 27, 2016
By jessicaoldenburg BRONZE, Riverside , California
jessicaoldenburg BRONZE, Riverside , California
1 article 0 photos 0 comments

Well you see Mrs. V I really didn't want to be late to your class but I had no choice. The universe put all these obstacles in my way and it was impossible for me to ignore them, so I'm going to now tell you all the reasons I was late this morning. It all started off when there was a frog in my shower, now clearly that is not something you could just ignore and jump in the shower with so I had to calmly grab the frog but it was quite slippery due to the shower water I had just recently turned on, so it took a couple of minutes of hopping and leaping until I could firmly grasp it to take it outside. Once the frog was safely outside I took my hot shower. Once out of the shower and dried off, I went to my room to get dressed. After I was fully clothed and ready to make my way to my car and go to school and be a couple of minutes early, I heard this animalistic cry. Now I couldn't just ignore that so I went in search of the shrill screaming, to my surprise I found my neighbors cat in my garage trapped under a box. When I lifted the box the cat jumped at me with rage, knocking me down. It scratched and attacked me with such fierce power! Once it had decided it gave me a good solid beating, it ran off.  When I finally got up off of the ground I looked down and my uniform was torn and covered in hair and since our lovely and understanding school has such a tight dress code I knew I would have to change. Once I finished getting redressed, I went and got into my car. Whilst driving I was stopped at a stop sign and noticed there was a woman sitting at a bus stop and looked like she was choking. I pulled over and ran to her and performed the Heimlich on her and after a solid 30 seconds of doing so, she spit out a huge piece of hot dog that was lodged in her throat, which I find to be a strange breakfast food but that's beside the point. Once she gained a solid breathe she thanked me a million times and begged me to let her pay for some coffee. Now of course I couldn't let this woman NOT repay me, after all she absolutely insisted. After we got coffee I began my journey to school, but then I remember I forgot my iPad at home. Damn! I hurried home to get my device and while I was driving back through my neighborhood, I saw a boy trying to jump up a tree. I rolled down my window and asked what he was doing. The boy said " I'm trying to get my cat! It's stuck in the tree!" Now I am no fireman but I will help an animal in need at anytime. I got out of my car a went climbing up the tree. Once up there I realized the cat was the very same cat that attacked me while saving it from the box in my garage holding it captive. I proceed to call it to me and grab at it and once I got a hold of it I saw this piercing hatred look in its eyes and I think it remembered me. It began clawing and I dropped from the tree, cat in hand. Now that I did this very kind deed, to only be scratched at AGAIN, I ran home and grabbed my iPad. I decided it was time for me to finally get to school now that I was 20 minutes late. I drove to school, and now I'm here. So you see Mrs. V I  just really wasn't meant to be here on time, I really had no choice in my tardiness today and I strongly believe it should be excused.



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