I decided that after finally graduating high school, despite my previous motivation for immediately going into college, I'd get a job. In the past, I only really saw a job as a way to make money, and only then when I was trying to save up for something. After I got what I wanted, I quit.
College is expensive, any form of schooling is, so I figured taking a year off to save money up wouldn't hurt. My mother is very kind, she didn't mind and would support my choices so long as I promised I would eventually continue my studies. This is how I landed my unfavorable job as someone who delivered pizzas. I figured this was probably my pessimistic and anxious brain speaking, I don't actually expect it to be extremely deplorable, but you never know.
The pizzeria I work at isn't a chain, and my boss had told me not to expect to have to deliver every day. I didn't the first day, so I worked the cash register for most of yesterday. Today we had actually received orders that I needed to take care of, so after I put the pizzas in the pizza bag, I headed into my car and drove off. I prayed to God that I wasn't going to stop in a bad neighborhood, I had a decent car and I didn't want to be car jacked.
The first house I had to deliver to wasn't actually so bad, it was an okay place in an okay neighborhood. The house was painted an obnoxious bright red, when usually a house would be a nice shade of creamy white....or something that wasn't this attention grabbing. The lawn was unkempt with dry dead patches of grass, and had wilting flowers. For some reason, it irked me. As soon as I walked up the cigarette littered porch, hot food in hand, I rang the doorbell. I noticed it didn't work and was forced to knock. I only felt more vexed when whoever ordered hadn't answered the first time and had to rap at the door once more.
“Hold your horses, I'm comin’!” I heard a loud voice say. Hold your horses? Who even says that anymore?
When the man answered, the first thing I noticed was the strong smell of fresh cigarette smoke in the air and trying to escape out the door. He had been smoking indoors, and in fact had a cigarette in his hand. He had stubble all over the lower half of his face, and the hoodie he wore didn't hide his beer belly. His television played a commercial too loud to ignore, and I could see bits of trash on the floor if I so much as peered inside.
“Delivery for Omar...” I began to say, squinting my eyes at the printed receipt because I had trouble pronouncing the last name, “Ma—”
“That's me!” He said while wearing a smug smile. There was nothing to be smug about.
“Right. Well, here's your order. That'll be fifteen—”
“D'you wanna come inside? I got beer,” He offered.
I immediately shook my head. I wanted to get out of here as fast as possible; the smoke was burning my nostrils. “No, thank you—” I started politely, only to be interrupted again.
“It's Saturday! You should take a break, pizza guy.” He flicked the butt of his finished cigarette near a small pile on the floor. Ah, so that's how they all ended up there.
Usually, I think I would feel flattered by this type of offer; especially, if by a very slim chance, a girl were to offer. However, this was a guy that had greasy looking hair and smelled kind of rancid, as if he hadn’t showered in a day or ten. To make matters worse, he was very obviously drunk, or at least buzzed. He also kept interrupting me. I wasn't too pleased.
When he slung his long arm over my shoulder, it took everything in me to not immediately rip it off and run back into my car without getting the money for the food. I stayed regardless, reminding myself it's not a good idea to have your pay docked on your second day on the job.
“I'm sorry, but I really need to get back to work. I only just started yesterday, and—”
“Oh!” The man exclaimed, as if he suddenly understood why I couldn't accept his offer. I shouldn't even have to turn down his offer, it should have never been said in the first place. “A newbie, I see. I get it. Worried about your boss, or whatever!” He removed his arm from my shoulders to pat me on the back, and I suddenly felt like I was being looked down on. Was worrying about your boss firing you something pitiable?
“Please, just, pay for the food.” Despite how extremely rude and exasperating this entire encounter was, I still felt that what I just said sounded pretty impatient and irritated. I was, but I shouldn't show it, lest he file a complaint. I hastily added, “You know, before it gets cold.”
The smelly man looked surprised, as if he had completely forgotten I was here to deliver a pizza.
“Right, right.” He winked at me. “Gotta keep the man at bay. Just for now.” What was he talking about?
In any case, he fished a twenty out of his pocket and traded it for the pizza. I didn't realize it had been burning my hand until it was taken from me.
“This should cover it, right?” I nodded, deciding that it'd be a small tip for me if I just didn't tell him the full price. He doesn't seem like someone concerned with change, anyhow.
When I was about to grip the bill, he snatched it away from my reach. I gave him a bemused look, and tried grabbing it again, only to have it out of my reach once more. I stopped and stared at him. He snickered. I don't think someone's goofy grin has ever gotten on my nerves so quickly. It's so obvious he thinks he's being funny, probably charming too. Maybe it would be if he didn't reek and didn't have a questionable stain on his pants.
“If you take my offer, I'll pay you!” He winked at me and held his money behind his back. Is he hitting on me? Actually, it sounds more like I'm being solicited. This is getting weird.
I decided trying to play along will just get me nowhere, because this man has nothing better to do than to torment someone who's doing their job. I held out my open hand and waited for him to just hand me the money, like a normal person is supposed to do.
The man stared at my hand for a minute and pouted like a petulant child before placing the twenty in my hand. “Man, you're no fun.” I can't believe that actually worked, I mentally berated myself a bit for not thinking about doing this earlier.
After finally, finally, closing the door and leaving me alone at his doorstep; I quickly made it back to my car and sped away, not wanting the guy to come back out and decide another conversation was a good a idea. I vaguely wondered if I smelled like him.