Tiny flakes of chalky ash are thrown carelessly by the whispering wind, the miniscule embers launching themselves off the end of my recently lit cigarette and landing like dirty snowflakes on Devin’s cheeks. I casually stand above his still body and examine him with empty eyes, each emerald orb void of all traces of emotions and utterly blank in every way possible. I cannot help but admire how peaceful he looks as he lies sprawled out on the crumbling cement, his usual scowling face completely slack and lifeless. The word ‘innocent’ flashes through my mind as I take in his current state, the absurd thought causing a strangled chuckle to erupt from my throat. 

A gentle sea breeze whips my salty amber hair around my face, the sticky strands sticking in the corners of my mouth and obstructing my vision, blocking my view of the still life form that practically rests upon the worn top of my ancient sneakers. With a heavy sigh I bend my stiff knees and kneel besides the once living, breathing Devin, my pale bony hands trembling as I peel the straw-like hairs from my pink lips. My long, thin fingers curl around each other to create two small fists, squeezed so tight that my knuckles turn a ghostly shade of white and my fingernails leave half-moon shaped indents in the soft flesh of my palms. The sudden urge to shake Devin awake overwhelms me, an emotion that almost resembles fury flaring up deep within me. My harsh glare lands on his limp arms, each muscled limb covered in tiny little pin pricks, the miniature holes dotting his arms like brilliant stars in the dark night sky. Ever so slowly I run my rough thumb over the spots where each silver needle was injected into his delicate skin, imaging Devin’s calloused hands frantically pressing down on the plungers and shooting up the addictive drug.

Heroin had been Dev’s partner in crime ever since I had met him, a friendly companion that he eagerly consoled during his darkest of times, and a magical comrade that could boost his spirits whenever it was available. But that’s the problem right there.  At some point the supply ran out, and when we couldn’t manage to scrap up enough spare change to afford a refill, Dev simply had to go without. When you take away the one thing that makes a man happy, he tends to react in a not-so-nice way. He tends to viciously strike out at those who only tried to help him, lashing out with vile words and violent punches, leaving bruises inside and out. I guess in the end, Devin got what he deserved. 

Silent streams of tears slide down my crimson cheeks, the dewy beads of water landing with a noiseless splat on the horribly stained shirt that is stretched across my boyfriend’s body.  A gust of ocean air suddenly fills my nostrils with a terrible stench, the metallic odor of fresh blood sending me back to only a mere five minutes ago, when a smooth metal bullet ripped its way through Devin’s chest.  Out of the corner of my eye I spot the abandoned murder weapon lying carelessly by my feet, my hands desperately reaching out for it. I carefully tuck it into the deep pocket of my bag and stand  up, sending Devin’s dead body once final glance before I spin on my heel and head towards my parked truck.

Absentmindedly, I pull out a fresh white tissue from back bag and wipe the warm crimson blood from my hands, balling up the now bright red cloth and shoving it back into the side compartment, right beside the gun. With a loud grunt I manage to tug the sticky driver’s door open and gracefully slide into the cracked leather seat, inserting the keys into the ignitions and starting up the junky car. “Momma, where are we going?” A sweet voice reverberates from the seat behind mine and I swivel around so I can face the confused little boy, a genuine smile spread across my tired face. “Somewhere safe, Jacob. We’re finally going to be safe.” I say and turn back around, pulling at the gearshift until I manage to maneuver it into reverse and peel out of the faded asphalt driveway. I do not look back at the body I am leaving behind, the body that I killed, because it is only that; A body.