Monkey Bars MAG

December 18, 2008
By Taylor Cutshall SILVER, Westminster, Colorado
Taylor Cutshall SILVER, Westminster, Colorado
8 articles 0 photos 0 comments

When we were younger, I remember sitting on the monkey bars in the snow. We took off our hats and scarves, one at a time, to see who was the strongest, the bravest. I always won because you’d freaked out when your hands stuck to the metal – you were afraid they’d never come off. I’d call you a little girl and you’d throw your hat at me.

The snow would fall and we’d talk about kid stuff, and I’d wonder why I liked you so much. We would talk about things we thought were so important: Pokémon and Digimon, and all of the other “mon” type things that I can’t even remember anymore; you were always better at them than me.

The snow fell and the soft glow of the streetlights made each flake seem like a fallen firefly, a lightning bug processional that I could never tear my eyes from, except to look at you. Our breath would hold the light as well. You would put two fingers to your lips and pull them away, exhaling and pretending that you were smoking a cigarette. I was afraid to do that because my mom smoked and I knew it was only for grownups.

Now it’s snowing again, and we’re sitting outside on the hood of your white compact car. It’s dark – three in the morning. The only light comes from your headlights and sends a dull pain through my eyes. I like the darkness.

Well, that’s not true. The second light comes from a small orange ember between your fingers, between your thin lips. Now your breath mingles with real smoke, creating a ballet of young and old, of mature and immature, of ignorant and just plain stupid. My legs are crossed and I watch you, wondering when exactly we grew up, or if you ever really grew up at all. Am I sick of the burning of secondhand smoke in my throat, the smell it leaves on me … or does it only intrigue me more?

You smile at me, your ball cap flattening your hair into your brown eyes. Your free hand grasps mine comfortingly. I inhale deeply and cast my eyes down, knowing that I was never going to be strong enough to remove the particular layer that led to nicotine. Or perhaps it’s the other way around, and I’m the winner again.



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This article has 52 comments.


on Nov. 14 2010 at 12:39 pm
Chitra.I PLATINUM, Dubai, Other
44 articles 2 photos 131 comments

Favorite Quote:
Everything makes sense if you think too much about it.

This is amazing. Like....amazing.

bubj98 BRONZE said...
on Nov. 14 2010 at 11:14 am
bubj98 BRONZE, Oceanside, California
4 articles 0 photos 32 comments

Favorite Quote:
"hate is a strong word ,but love is a stronger one"
"sometimes batteries help when the little robot inside your head stops working"
"i guess that guy over there is like...alive?"

i liked how it showed that when the other character imagined they were smoking as a kid and then were actually smoking into adult hood.i loved the chemistry and how poetically beautiful it was.great job,keep writing .and check out my work everyonce and a while.thanks.

LexiB SILVER said...
on Oct. 1 2010 at 10:28 pm
LexiB SILVER, Tallassee, Alabama
7 articles 0 photos 34 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous, do not be terrified, do not be discouraged. For the Lord your God will be with you where ever you go."







Joshua 1:9

You did a good job writing this. I like how you kept it short and sweet, but added enough details. Will you check out my work? I only have one story so far, but I'll submit more soon.

Coop123 BRONZE said...
on Oct. 1 2010 at 6:33 pm
Coop123 BRONZE, Mt. Airy, Maryland
1 article 0 photos 40 comments

Favorite Quote:
Deja vu'! This is the part where I tell you to SHUT UP!!!

awesome wat i ws trying 2 say is smokin is dumb...

 


Coop123 BRONZE said...
on Oct. 1 2010 at 6:32 pm
Coop123 BRONZE, Mt. Airy, Maryland
1 article 0 photos 40 comments

Favorite Quote:
Deja vu'! This is the part where I tell you to SHUT UP!!!

 and to you.. :}

on Jul. 27 2010 at 8:12 pm
deus-ex-machina14 BRONZE, Stewartsville, New Jersey
1 article 0 photos 439 comments

Favorite Quote:
"There are two main tragedies in life. One is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it." -Oscar Wilde

Very interesting and unique. Great!

on Jul. 27 2010 at 5:22 pm
DarkMountain BRONZE, Portland, Oregon
4 articles 0 photos 39 comments

Favorite Quote:
My eyes feel so heavy when the stars are calling me
- Join with us eternally -
I'm falling in deep trance and my powers are weakening
I'm falling in a world between dreams and reality
... I'm sailing away to undiscovered seas...
Oh time...

Great descriptions... Loved it! 5 stars

on Jul. 27 2010 at 1:59 pm
bluesky0728 SILVER, Phoenix, Arizona
8 articles 0 photos 107 comments
this is in the fiction section...

on Jul. 27 2010 at 1:32 am
DannyKid33 PLATINUM, Pleasant Hill, California
34 articles 2 photos 81 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Don't ever let the media tell you what to look like. You're beautiful the way you are. Stay beautiful, keep it ugly." - Gerard Way.

so good and sad yet amazing all at the same time. basically it was jst beatiful i loved it so much

on Jul. 5 2010 at 6:57 pm
still-a-novice BRONZE, Balderdash, Illinois
4 articles 0 photos 25 comments

Favorite Quote:
Attention people! This is life here! This is not a rehersal. I repeat, Life is not a Rehersal!

Like kksme said, the change was good.

 


kksme SILVER said...
on Jun. 13 2010 at 6:34 pm
kksme SILVER, Greenvale, New York
9 articles 0 photos 11 comments
I really like the change from childhood to adulthood. This was really good.

on Jun. 13 2010 at 3:12 pm
whatshername GOLD, Carlsbad, California
14 articles 1 photo 112 comments
this is great!

halez96 SILVER said...
on Apr. 8 2010 at 3:41 pm
halez96 SILVER, North Augusta, South Carolina
7 articles 0 photos 8 comments

Favorite Quote:
"The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return." -Moulin Rouge

Its really good.. I just don't really see where nicotine and cigarettes comes into it. Then again, maybe I wasn't paying enough attention.

Anyways, you're a great writer(:


MamaF said...
on Feb. 1 2010 at 1:21 pm
I thought it was awsome!

MamaC said...
on Feb. 1 2010 at 1:11 pm
i loved this piece of writing!

lrlr17 said...
on Feb. 1 2010 at 11:52 am
you did a great job

on Nov. 5 2009 at 12:56 pm
this article was good. how old were you when you used to hang on the monkey bars?

on Oct. 11 2009 at 1:24 pm
accio-sarcasm, Nunya Effin Business, Other
0 articles 0 photos 59 comments

Favorite Quote:
"To the well organized man, death is but the next great adventure."
-Dumbledore, Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone

"There's nothing wrong with you. There's just a lot wrong with the world you live in."
-Chris Colfer

??? Whats that gotta do with the story???

on Oct. 11 2009 at 1:21 pm
accio-sarcasm, Nunya Effin Business, Other
0 articles 0 photos 59 comments

Favorite Quote:
"To the well organized man, death is but the next great adventure."
-Dumbledore, Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone

"There's nothing wrong with you. There's just a lot wrong with the world you live in."
-Chris Colfer

C'mon, Whatsyourname! Stop smoking!!!

Lol:):) FABULOUS story! Best one that I've read on Teenink!

on Aug. 22 2009 at 4:31 am
cayleebobaylee BRONZE, Cumberland, Rhode Island
1 article 12 photos 4 comments
Honestly, that was a amazing piece of work. Hit me a little, i have family that smokes and i really want them to stop; but that's never going to happen. You did a great job :]




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