Change | Teen Ink

Change

February 12, 2014
By Maggieabide SILVER, Covington, Louisiana
Maggieabide SILVER, Covington, Louisiana
6 articles 0 photos 0 comments

Change


Sitting in her gloomy but wicked room, Samantha, or as her friends call her, Skidds, lies on her bed pondering what the point of school is.

"I mean why do we even have homework if we sit in a classroom all day learning about the same useless stuff everyday?" she asks her friend Morgan.

Morgan is Samantha's best friend since pre-school. They met while playing with baby dolls in the Boulder City Day Care Center when they were 4 years old. They've been friends for 13 years.

Morgan, being the more rational one of the two, says, "Think about it Skidds, if we didn't have school, you wouldn't have any art classes to learn from. And we both know, you would die without art in your life."

And she was right. Samantha has been drawing for a number of years. She has always drawn things that fit her personality. Her favorite thing to draw is skulls, but sometimes she likes to go deeper, drawing pictures of what her dream life would be like.


Samantha was adopted when she was 2. Her parents names are Rod and Tammy Wells and they adopted Samantha in 1996. Samantha hates her parents. They are never around. Her dad's a drunk and her mom spends most of her time shopping or out spending money somewhere.

She wonders where and who her REAL mother and father are. She asks herself questions such as: Why did they give me up? Why didn't they WANT me? Was I not good enough? She will never admit this curiosity because it makes her feel weak inside and she can't show people this side of her.

Whenever she feels this way, she pours her emotions onto paper, into her art.

Morgan finishes up her homework, Samantha doesn't, and they decide to go out.


Some of the kids at Boulder High, the school Samantha attends, have a hangout spot by an old abandoned pool called "The Pit". This is where most of the sketchy or "troubled" kids, as they say, go to hang out to forget about their sorry lives. Samantha and Morgan meet up with some friends at the pit. When they arrive, they're approached by their friends Pete, Alice, Blaze, and Jax, who is Samantha's boyfriend.

Samantha and Jax have been dating for a couple of months, nothing serious. Jax isn't the serious type anyway. He is always sneaking around with other girls not caring what Samantha thinks but she likes him to much to break up with him.

Samantha smiles at the sight of Jax, but of course, Jax being Jax, doesn't react the same way. Instead, he murmurs a quiet "Hey Skidds", and then walks away. "What's his deal?" Samantha asks Pete. "You know how he is", says Pete, "he gets in those moods where he's mad at the world, thinks he is no good, and wants to do nothing but drink and mope around to feel sorry for himself." Samantha turns away. "I still wonder why you even stay with him," says Alice. Samantha, agitated by the comment, walks away.

She wants to draw. She wants to forget about Jax for a moment, try to focus on the only thing she knows matters.

So she decides to walk home. It's only a short walk back to her neighborhood, but it's cold. She pulls her black hoodie over her head and begins to jog so she will get there faster. She arrives at her house, opens the front door, and sees her parents both sitting at the dining room table.

This is a odd sight. Her mom is actually home, and her dad isn't wasted on the couch watching ESPN. She knows something is up.

"Samantha kid, we wanna talk to you for a second." says her dad. "We're going to be making a big change."

Kid? Why is he calling me kid? Samantha thinks to herself. He barley even remembers my name half the time and now he's calling me kid?

"Okay," murmurs Samantha, "what's the change?"

"Your father and I have found a home. Somewhere else, not in Boulder." Tammy says. "We are moving to Florida. First thing next week."

Florida? What the heck is in Florida? She thinks. "Why are we moving there? Everything is here- my friends, school, my whole life is here!" She exclaims.

"Our decision is final. We will leave first thing on Monday morning."

Samantha is furious. She storms upstairs to her room, slamming the door. She can't even begin to think about what just happened. She can't leave her friends. She can't leave Jax, Morgan, and all the other people that actually care about her.

Morgan. Her friend of 13 years. How will she even begin to say goodbye?

They leave in a week, Samantha has to pack her things, say goodbye to her friends, and leave her life in Boulder behind.

A few days have gone by and Samantha hasn't slept a bit. She is struggling with the idea of moving and is trying to understand how she will go on. Today will be the day she tells Morgan. She only has 4 days left and she can't go any longer with this secret.

Samantha meets Morgan at her house, like they do everyday before school. It's kind of like a tradition. The thought of losing this tradition makes Samantha sad. Before Morgan can say anything, Samantha just comes right out and says it.

"I'm moving. I'm moving in 4 days and I will probably never see you again."
"What?" Says Morgan.

"Yes", she says, "my parents dropped this bomb on me the other day acting like it was no big deal. What am I going to do? I can't pick up everything I have and leave Boulder. I can't leave my school. I can't leave you."

Morgan, someone who never shows a sense of emotion, begins to cry. "This is horrible Skidds, I mean really bad. We have gotten through so much together. Who will I go to if I need something"

"I know," Samantha says, "I hate my parents. I wish they never would have adopted me. I wonder what my real parents would have done."

This is the first time she's spoken of them. In front of Morgan, in front of anyone, for that matter.

"We will keep in touch. We will talk everyday and will never go a day without calling each other. You promise?" Morgan asks.

"I promise," Samantha answers.

The next few days go by in a heart beat. Samantha and Morgan spent the whole four days together. Samantha said her goodbyes to Jax and her other friends down at The Pit. She packed everything she owned and threw it in the moving truck. In a few short hours Rod, Tammy, and her would be on their way to Sunnyville, Florida.

Unfortunately, it is time for them to leave. Samantha and Morgan stand in the driveway next to the moving trucks. "Remember our promise," says Morgan, "I love you."
"I love you too," Samantha sadly says.

It was like a scene from a movie, pulling away from her house and her best friend, all happening in slow motion. It was a long, miserable drive down to Sunnyville, one Samantha was not looking forward to. She plugged her headphones in, clicked on "The Cure Radio Station" and pulled out her sketchbook and a pencil. This will be the only thing to get her through the never ending, dreadful car ride.

Finally, they arrive to their new home. All Samantha can think is wow. The house is a huge two story sitting right on the beach. She knows she should feel a little excitement, but she just can't. She is not one for hot weather and beaches. I mean, she's lived in Colorado her whole life. She know it will be a new adjustment. Tomorrow will be her first day attending her new school, Central High, home of the cougars. She know this will not be her scene, a school full of prissy cheerleaders and football jocks.

She walks in the house and it really is beautiful. She goes straight upstairs picking a room, not speaking to her parents. She throws everything on the floor, jumps in bed, and falls into a deep sleep. When she wakes up, she will be beginning a new life here in Sunnyville.

As soon as her eyes open, she dreads today. She throws on her black hoodie, jeans, and combat boots; throwing some makeup on and of course the black eye makeup she loves. She walks downstairs grabs an apple and walks out the door. She uses the directions her parents gave her leading to the school.

She walks through the double doors and it's exactly what she expected. Tan, beautiful girls all over their jock boyfriends. She feels out of place. She walks to the door that says office and goes in. She meets with the principle, Mr. Roy. He gives her her schedule and tells her everything she needs to know.

She has 7 classes a day: Physics, Civics, English, PE, Fine Arts, Spanish, and Art IV. Art, thank God for Art.

"Sophie, here, will be with you all day today, helping you with anything you need." Principle Roy says. He points to a little scrawny girl wearing glasses and a high waist preppy skirt. "Hi, I'm Sophie!"

Ugh, Thinks Samantha, "Hey, um I'm Skidds." She says.

Their first class is Physics, her least favorite class of all. It's impossible to pay attention. She gets through her first 5 classes, and now it's time for lunch. Where will I sit? Who will I talk to? I wish Morgan was here. She thinks. She ends up sitting with Sophie and listens to her blabber about Math and Science, and how she has a B in AP Civics. "My mom is going to kill me," she says.

Her next class is Art. A feeling of relief. Her and Sophie walk to class and for the first time today, she feels excited. She walks in and feels at ease. She can't wait to start drawing. Her teachers name is Ms. Jules and she is about 40 years old. Immediately, Samantha has an indescribable feeling that sends chills through her body when Ms. Jules looks at her for the first time.

She has never seen or talked to this woman before, but she feels like she knows her. She goes to a table and picks a spot to sit in. She can't stop thinking about how she might know this woman, but nothing comes to mind. She gets out a piece of paper and pencil and begins to draw a skull because she couldn't think of anything else to draw. Zoned out, into her drawing, Samantha jumps at the sound of a voice.

"That's an interesting drawing you got there. Samantha, isn't it?" Says Ms. Jules. "Uh, yes. Thanks, I guess." Samantha answers back.

"Don't get me wrong it's good, but why the skull?"

"I don't know. I just like drawing them and it's what I'm interested in." Says Samantha.

The sound of the bell scares Samantha. She had lost the track of time while drawing. She packs up her stuff and walks out the room, almost running into a couple of people. Why am I so jumpy? Samantha thinks. Why do I feel so weird and in a way, vulnerable, right now? She can't shake the feeling she has connected with Ms. Jules.

She walks home, barging into the front door of her new house, walking straight towards the computer. She clicks on the internet explorer symbol and types in: Suzanne Jules. She caught a glimpse of Ms. Jules' first name on her tag when she walked into class for the first time earlier that day.

Right before giving up, something catches Samantha's eye. It's a adoption website. She clicks on it and a big, long list comes up. Before her, she reads a list of names: mothers, fathers, mothers and fathers. Then, she see it.

Suzanne Jules.

At the top of the list, there is a introduction to the website that explains what it's all about. This adoption website is for parents, single or married, that have given up their child for adoption and live in the area.

Samantha thinks, does this mean anything? Is there a reason I feel this connection between Ms. Jules and I? Could she be... Could she be my mother? This thought is crazy. She couldn't possibly be her mother. Samantha doesn't know what to do. So, she picks up the phone and calls her best friend, Morgan.

"Hello?" Answers Morgan.

"Hey Morgan, it's me. I think might have found something that I may, or may not want to know the truth about." Says Samantha. "What is it," asks Morgan, "is everything okay?"

"I think so, I don't know. I think I might know who my birth mother is. I don't know for sure if it is her, but I have the strongest feeling. I feel connected to her, in a way I've never felt with anyone else before." Samantha explains.

"What? Do you really think so? I mean are you sure?" Morgan asks Samantha. "Yes. I am almost positive. She teaches art, and art is like my life." She answers back. "Well what are you going to do?" Morgan asks.

"I think I have to ask her." Samantha says.

And that's what she was going to do. After talking to Morgan for a while, she came to the decision that she was going to approach Ms. Jules and come straight out and ask her. The next day, first thing in the morning, she would walk in her room and discover if she was her mother or not.

That night she couldn't sleep. She was anxious, excited, but most of all nervous. She was afraid of the answer she would receive. Yes or no, her life will change.

The morning was now here. Samantha got dressed and walked to school. Once again she opens the double doors to the school, more nervous than the first day. She walks towards Ms. Jules class, stands in front of her door, and takes a deep breath.

While opening the door, Samantha knows that this moment will change her life forever.



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