I Will Try to Fix You | Teen Ink

I Will Try to Fix You

February 10, 2014
By Bay_Renee SILVER, Brinkhaven, Ohio
Bay_Renee SILVER, Brinkhaven, Ohio
7 articles 2 photos 39 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Kites rise the highest when going against the wind."
-Winston Churchill


You are suspended in the air by a single copper chord, dropped down directly in the center of the room. You are a prized possession of your owner, and he indeed has valid reason to take pride in you. You are beautiful- a captivating source of radiant light that casts shadows over the room. You are wonderfully intriguing to anyone who sees you, and especially so to those who take the time to appreciate you.
When someone new steps into the room, your owner throws his arm up at you and slaps on a painted grin, exclaiming, “This is my chandelier. It never sways, never dims, stays as steady as the stars on a clear summer night. It is lovely. It is beautiful.”
As he speaks and the others observe you, study you, you remain still- still as ‘the stars on a clear summer night’. You let your golden lining shining and your blue, teardrop crystals shimmer in the light that you yourself are radiating. You are lovely and beautiful and bright for the amount of time that is takes for your audience to look at you, love you, and then leave you.
As they stride away, you realize none of them ever stay. They follow your owner into another room where another prized possession is placed and when you find yourself alone, you’re still lovely and beautiful and steady, but you grow dim. Your sparkle dulls with your own fading light.
When your owner takes his guests upstairs and they carelessly forget that you are hanging from the very floorboards they are currently stomping on, you begin to sway, but no one sees. That can’t happen. If it did, your owner, the one who thinks you’re lovely and beautiful, might replace you with a light source that outshines your own. You wouldn’t let that happen…But what if you did? Would anyone still love you?
You shine brighter with a newfound determination. You sparkle and flicker and make the shadows dance over the walls, gracing them with your brilliant light show. You are beautiful, lovely, but the people above and around you are still careless. You’re shaking, no longer in control- spinning, but no one notices. The chord, the single copper chord that is holding you in your position snaps and gravity warmly welcomes you, even though you have defied it for so long.
You shatter on impact. Your crystals are crushed to mere dust and your light goes out and you’re still beautiful, but very broken. Your owner sees you as a mess to clean up and your audience, the ones who once marveled over you, are now ashamed of you… Don’t they understand that even the best have the ability to be broken?
I am sad for you. Your shadows have all dispersed, gone back into hiding, and you’re no longer suspended high in the air by your braided copper chord. You are on the cold wooden floor, being observed in a new way. You are unable to be fixed. You are no longer a prized position. You are a shameful heap of gold flaked dust, unable to give light and have no purpose now that you have fallen.
Why do I feel so sorry for you, though?
After all, you are simply a chandelier.


The author's comments:
I have a slight obsession with metaphors... Enjoy!

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This article has 6 comments.


on Mar. 15 2014 at 9:06 pm
kingofwriters BRONZE, DeWitt, Michigan
1 article 0 photos 196 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Books are a uniquely portable magic." - Stephen King

I love books, and I love technology, but I don't want to see the latter overwhelm the former. I just think books are meant to be pages you turn, not screens you scroll through.

I don't think I could explain it better than BlackbeltJames, but I had to comment on this because this story deserves comments. You do such a good job with the personification of a simple chandelier which makes this story wonderfully sad and thoughtful. The chandelier's story represents how people always want to be adored and wanted, but how life can sometimes tragically deliver less than what is offered. This is a powerful, thought-provoking story and is the mark of a fantastic writer. Keep on writing! :)

on Mar. 1 2014 at 6:10 pm
Bay_Renee SILVER, Brinkhaven, Ohio
7 articles 2 photos 39 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Kites rise the highest when going against the wind."
-Winston Churchill

Oh, thanks so much for taking the time to read and write such a nice comment! Everything you said was exactly what I was trying to convey, so I'm glad you understood!

on Feb. 27 2014 at 6:15 pm
BlackbeltJames GOLD, Reading, Other
14 articles 0 photos 193 comments

Favorite Quote:
Isaac Asimov - "Intelligence is an accident of evolution, and not necessarily an advantage.”

I like how you humanised an inanimate object, giving it emotions. You portrayed them really well, you made the reader genuinly feel sorry for it. You also show the bluntness of humans, and how cruel society can be, as once you have run out of uses nobody cares, there is  very little loyalty or sentiment. You also give a couple of strong morals to the story, showing that you cannot always rely on looks or glory to let your ego hold you up, as one day you will surely fall, broken and shattered, while you are so unused to it; or that not even the people we think have the perfect lives, are always the most fortunate. It was well written with lots of context, good job :)

on Feb. 24 2014 at 7:13 pm
Bay_Renee SILVER, Brinkhaven, Ohio
7 articles 2 photos 39 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Kites rise the highest when going against the wind."
-Winston Churchill

   Thank you so much for the thoughtful comment and taking the time to read! I'll be sure to check your poem, too!^.^

on Feb. 24 2014 at 11:03 am
JacobTheOrdinary PLATINUM, Rancho Cucamonga, California
43 articles 0 photos 38 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Fiction is the lie that tells the truth."

Also, the title of this piece just ties it together because out of everyone, only the narrator is willing to fix the brokenness.

on Feb. 24 2014 at 11:02 am
JacobTheOrdinary PLATINUM, Rancho Cucamonga, California
43 articles 0 photos 38 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Fiction is the lie that tells the truth."

you are not the only one obsessing over metaphors. i really enjoy this poem. you both, from my opinion, personify a chandelier and make a metaphor between people and chandeliers. this is well written and i am sure to check more of your work. In the meantime, you should read my poem called "The Blade's Kiss" which also does the personifying and metaphors something to a person.


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