Beauty and the Beast

May 31, 2013
By mxckingbird SILVER, Missouri City, Texas
mxckingbird SILVER, Missouri City, Texas
8 articles 0 photos 6 comments

Favorite Quote:
"People run from rain but sit in bathtubs full of water." -Charles Bukowski

The carpet was worn all the way through. Footsteps followed the tattered path up to her deprived body, lying limp in the wooden, lace-stricken casket. She was so beautiful. They all walked past her and attempted to hold in their distressed cries and disheartening moans. Pure silence hung over them like a heavy rainstorm. It was pouring sorrow and grief as they stood there, dead, with no umbrellas to shelter them.

Ugly. She was utter beauty, but that truth evaded the world. They only saw her difference from the mind swept minions of society. Good for nothing. Her story was a bestseller, one that would touch the hearts of many, if only they listened. She was held together by weary tape and dissipating glue. She had fallen from great heights, only to be pushed off again and again. She lost hope, she lost faith. Fat. She was bruised and scarred by spoken daggers and fists. The beast within her grew stronger with every grimace of pain with no intentions of stopping its tirade until her touch was as cold as her shriveled soul.

She was truly beautiful, but it was hidden by disapproval. She longed to feel the slender touch of bones against her skin. The beast, obsessed with image, drove her to become that lifeless figure she’d dreamt of. Her heart fluttered with the synonymous quavering of a butterflies deathly wings. But, still the dissatisfaction on their faces was too much to carry on with her. She couldn’t kill the demon inside her without killing herself.

The only thing left to eat was happiness, so inevitably she starved. Finally, she slid her delicate hand down her torso. The bones?she could feel their presence up against her perfectly smooth skin. She smiled, as she lay in the cold, porcelain bath. A slow, struggling inhale and then the evenly chiseled knife slithered into the spaces between her grooved ribs. She managed to destroy the beauty on the outside trying to kill the beast on the inside. But she was finally free, and she never worried again.

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This article has 7 comments.

on Sep. 28 2014 at 10:22 pm
Creative-Writer BRONZE, Mesa, Arizona
4 articles 0 photos 37 comments

Favorite Quote:
We know what we are, but know not what we may be. -William Shakespeare

once I began reading, I couldn't pull myself away from the screen.  I am very glad I had the chance to read such a brilliantly well-written story.  And I hope to read more and more of your stuff! 

on Sep. 22 2014 at 6:49 pm
AutumnMoon BRONZE, Lebanon, Maine
3 articles 0 photos 23 comments

Favorite Quote:
"We see our better selves in the eyes of those who love us." -Cassandra Clare

I found this to be the most powerful of all of your work. This is something that people deal with far to often and I believe that it is a good subject to discuss. You are a fantastic writer and I urge you to continue. Absolutly lovely! 5/5

on Sep. 22 2014 at 5:11 am
Extraterrestrial SILVER, Singapore, Other
9 articles 4 photos 66 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Do what I do. Hold tight and pretend it's a plan!"

I just read all your written work in one sitting, and I need to remember that it's something I should not do again because it's not healthy for my heart. Again, that's a compliment. I apologize if it seems like I am sending mixed messages. You have a talent for making words flow so nicely. Honestly, if written words were to become human, I'm pretty sure you both would be best friends. I got goosebumps reading this. So many touching lines, so many metaphors and figurative comparisons and emotions. The bit about "weary tape and dissipating glue" is just awesome. This piece really is an eye-opener about the issues of depression, self-perception, and the judgment of society. I love the last paragraph and how the main character's actions are committed out of sheer necessity -- that there really is a beast inside her, and the only way to get rid of it was to get rid of herself entirely. A couple of minor mistakes: "...synonymous quavering of a butterflies deathly wings" should be "butterfly's deathly wings." Also, in the second paragraph you outlined the fact that the character's beauty was unseen by the world, and thus society thinks that she is ugly... so "She was so beautiful" in the first paragraph seems out of place. Some parts also seem to contradict one another. For example, "They all walked past her and attempted to hold in their distressed cries and disheartening moans." This gives off the sense that they're trying but not succeeding to hold in their cries, so there can't really be "pure silence" hanging over them. 

on Sep. 21 2014 at 10:05 pm
mxckingbird SILVER, Missouri City, Texas
8 articles 0 photos 6 comments

Favorite Quote:
"People run from rain but sit in bathtubs full of water." -Charles Bukowski

Oh my gosh thank you so much, that really means a lot :)

kamkit BRONZE said...
on Jul. 22 2014 at 11:31 pm
kamkit BRONZE, Ventura, California
4 articles 1 photo 22 comments
I must agree with the other comments and say I absolutely loved this. Granted, I was a little confused in the beginning because I wasn't quite sure of the context before reading the second paragraph, but after I went back again I saw even more how wonderfully(and terribly- in a good way) you protrayed the subject. You have a lot of description in here which aids the story because it is 80% raw emotion, and perfectly original lines that really got me ("Her story was a bestseller", "held together by weary tape and dissipating glue", "couldn't kill the demon inside without killing herself"....*shiver*) This works great as a flash fiction piece, and really couldn't get any better, excellent work :) PS The title also fits very well

on Jul. 13 2014 at 10:59 pm
Liv.Harris ELITE, Dardenne Prairie, Missouri
317 articles 10 photos 1155 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Let me glimpse inside your velvet bones." - Edgar Allan Poe

This is a great take on the story, very well written and flawlessly put forth! Please keep writing, you are an excellent author! :)

akstory GOLD said...
on Jun. 14 2013 at 2:37 pm
akstory GOLD, West Palm Beach, Florida
11 articles 3 photos 19 comments

Favorite Quote:
It is our choices . . . that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
~ J. K. Rowling

Oh my gosh Daniella Maria... That was amazing. Extremely depressing but definitely well-written. Ah you're such a good writer!


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