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A Victim Of The Gun

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Please. Don't call me a hero. Don't say that I am lucky. Don't allow your parents to use me as a dinner-time topic. And when you see me on the news, name and face under a heading like " Local Girl Saves School from Shooter", don't assume that I'm happy I lived, because we all lost something that day. Unfortunately for me, it was my heart.

I remember hearing the first shot during AP art. We all sat, shook shaken trembling in our desks, teachers marker poised at the board. Waiting. This period of waiting lasted a short while, and the silence spell was broken with the crackling sound of the loudspeaker. Principal Green's voice echoed around the tiny, windowless room. " this is a lock down. I repeat, dangerous personal in th-".

Second shot.

The teacher herded us like sheep into the supply closet. The 21 kids with stricken faces tumbled over numbed bodies, fighting for a place in the back. Paper and crayons shoved haphazardly to the floor. Ms. Levin closed the door, finger to her lips. We shook. Silence ate away at the tension, and for a fleeting minute we were given a present of false hope.

Then the third shot
And the fourth.
And the fifth.

Standing, pressed against Ms. Levin's arms and Emma's hip I counted 19 more shots followed by countless screams. Then,

Silence.

We heard the classroom door creak open and a girl squeaked. Hollowed footsteps brought walking death to our closet door.

Silence while the masked man turned the handle.

Silence, while lips trembled, noses ran with snot and faces quivered in hands.

Silence when he drew the gun and fired two shots.
I watched in slow motion as the bullet entered Ms. Levin's head. Watched as she thudded to the floor.

I watched in slow motion how the bullet flung itself into Emma's stomach, catapulting her backwards into a tub of markers. Watched as she placed small hands over the wound and drew them back red.

So when I turned my face back to the man, who had drew his gun on me, I decided I couldn't die. I wouldn't die. And when he said "sorry", finger on the trigger, my hand was already clasped around a clay knife, making way to its target.

And when I woke up in the hospital screaming. I felt the blood that was no longer on my hands, and searched for a heart with a now broken pulse.

So please. I am not a hero. Just another victim.



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dragonfly95 said...
Jul. 7, 2013 at 5:54 pm
This is a very interesting and pertinent work. I like it though there are a few grammatical errors, you can tell that your heart was in this peice. The last line was the best part. Good job :)
 
Diana101 said...
Jun. 19, 2013 at 8:14 pm
Wow, this was incredible . Very well written . I liked it :)
 
ephemeral said...
May 27, 2013 at 1:44 am
This is the second time that I've read this and I've liked it both times. The satire is made even more poignant by the fact that it's first person narrative in the viewpoint of the girl herself. The trauma of the event pokes through with the almost exhausted tone of the narrator and the disatisfaction with how her deed is being treated. This is a really emotionless retelling of the events, as though the victim is still experiencing the shock and trauma of the event (in denial), but a... (more »)
 
StarlitSunriseThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
May 24, 2013 at 7:24 pm
  I really liked the beginning of this. :) You put an interesting spin on a somewhat popular story, and the ending was definitely unexpected. Good writing!
 
Someone2know said...
May 23, 2013 at 12:16 pm
This was amazing.. :)
 
becca.37 said...
May 21, 2013 at 7:44 pm
I love it! Chilling, twisted, yet hopeful. I wouldn't change a thing!
 
Jade.I.AmThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
May 12, 2013 at 11:20 pm
This is fantastic!! So chilling......and ur such a good writer, u shld be proud! ;)
 
Cutey-Beauty said...
May 1, 2013 at 1:53 am
WOW! Brilliantly written! You really have a talent for suspense and chose your words well to bring out all the emotions. :) Keep on writing!
 
JustAnotherOwl said...
Apr. 29, 2013 at 6:08 pm
I really really really really adore this piece. I love the way it's written- seriously, you're incredibly talented! The lay out is great and I love the fact that the piece is so short- it gets across the point really well. I especially like, in the very beginning, when you use the phrase "dinner-time topic. This piece is really incredible.
 
Hanban12This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Apr. 27, 2013 at 10:00 am
OMG! I absolutely love this! it reminds me of the recent elementary school shooting... so sad! But i love how you first off grabbed the readers attention, not letting them go. I had to read this twice, and still got teh same affect. Awesome! :)
 
Makala said...
Apr. 24, 2013 at 9:18 pm
Good job! I liked it!
 
LexusMarieThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Apr. 23, 2013 at 8:21 pm
Liv! Liv! Liv! I love, love, love this! Your writter is always more impressive by each piece of work I read. I am so happy you wrote this.. seriously, this is AMAZING. The chills I got were like no other and it made my body shudder! (See what I did there?) Seriously, the emotion in here is CRAZY good. I love the title and the first stanza, sets up the beginning of something I'll never forget reading. The way the whole story is layed out is very good. I mean this is so spectacular. The emotio... (more »)
 
LexusMarieThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Apr. 24, 2013 at 6:14 pm
OMG. SERIOUSLY. writing* not writter.
 
JettaWintryThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Apr. 23, 2013 at 5:53 pm
You have quite a few grammar errors, but WOW. This is fantastic. I love the drama, the emotion, and everything. This is so well-written. 5/5
 
Literature_DarlingThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Apr. 22, 2013 at 9:18 pm
So brilliant that I have no words at all...I sat here staring at my screen for five minutes trying to find something to describe how I'm feeling....I just can't  
 
Artgirl1999 replied...
Apr. 22, 2013 at 9:39 pm
Wow. That was breathtaking. Wow. I don't have any critiques for this. It was amazing.
 
MckayThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Apr. 22, 2013 at 3:51 pm
OMG!! That gave me chills. A cold sweat is running down my spine. This is something everyone needs to read. Great work.
 
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