Morning | Teen Ink

Morning MAG

March 25, 2013
By Drac-in-Black GOLD, London, Ohio
Drac-in-Black GOLD, London, Ohio
16 articles 0 photos 11 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Never apologizing for feeling. When you do so, you apologize for the truth." - Benjamin Disraeli


The puddle of rainwater is a reminder of a past long gone. I stare into it. My face has changed a lot the last few years. What was once gentle and accepting is now hard and unforgiving. Steel blue eyes filled with daggers glare back at me from the water below an unruly shock of hair. I don't recognize myself. I don't want to.

I look up. The sky is gray, a blanket of colorlessness. The street is soaked in fog, illuminated every few feet by the glow of a street lamp.

A car roars by. I catch eclipsed glimpses of a black sedan. The color matches my mood. I hear the tires squeal as it splashes through a puddle, and I'm drenched with dirty water. I don't care. I welcome the wetness. It's rejuvenating.

I start walking down the street, my hands in my pockets. You appear beside me as I know you will. I pull up my hood and ignore you. Your hair is wet, plastered to your face, making you appear more beautiful than ever. You put your arms around my waist. I feel nothing.

“I'm worried about you,” you whisper. Your voice is sad and slips into my ears unobtrusively. Your body is flickering, like a light bulb in a thunderstorm. I bite back a reply and grimace as I feel teeth clamp on my tongue. Blood fills my mouth. I swallow it, tasting its saltiness.

“Let me help you,” you sob. I don't respond. You are not real. You are a memory. I loved you once. The tears on my face are a reminder of a past long gone.



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This article has 2 comments.


on Apr. 25 2013 at 6:21 pm
LexusMarie PLATINUM, Las Cruces, New Mexico
27 articles 0 photos 423 comments

Favorite Quote:
The more control you have over yourself, the less control others have over you.

Hi there, Krian! Wow, this was wonderful. I love the title, it's interesting, the reader doesn't know what the story will be about but wants to read it. The first paragraph is so strong, the way you word things and the way you describe is outstanding. It's mysterious and I am eager to read more. I like the line 'blanket of bland colorlessness.' Awesome! The character in your story is so interesting.. I can't figure them out! I'd love if you continued this into something more. Talk about them before and how they got to such a bad place. Talk more about the other character, this could be a novel. Great job!

Mckay ELITE said...
on Apr. 12 2013 at 2:24 pm
Mckay ELITE, Somewhere, Virginia
146 articles 0 photos 2230 comments

Favorite Quote:
"The people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world are the ones who do."
—Apple’s “Think Different” commercial, 1997
“Crazy people are considered mad by the rest of the society only because their intelligence isn't understood.”
― Weihui Zhou

Again, I'm amazed by your writing ability. Another exceptional piece. One thing: did you forget to capitalize "let" in the last paragraph. Other than that this is an enjoyable read. From start to finish. You don't disappoint but promise even better for the future.