“Eli!”

Jessica stared disbelievingly at her sprinting brother and the giant black bear that was his pursuer. She knew that she had to get away too, but she was frozen with fear; she also needed to help her brother. Jessica’s breathing quickly turned into exhausting pants as she tried to follow her brother and the beast. There was no way he could out run a bear, Jessica’s thoughts raced through her head. He was only a fourth grader, and Jessica knew that even a fully grown man could not run away from that huge furry mass. The seconds seemed like hours as Jessica constantly squinted in attempts to see through the darkness and find her brother. Every bounding step that the bear made on the ground with its huge paws Jessica hoped and prayed that the crunch and cracking sound that came were only dead branches or twigs—and not her brothers bones.

Suddenly, the bear stopped its chasing and stood on all fours. Jessica quickly stopped chasing as well and attempted to hide behind a near by tree. She watched the bear’s glowing eyes turn from side to side, as if it were analyzing ever detail of the dark midnight forest. Jessica hoped that this was a good sign; that the bear had lost her brother. Jessica took the opportunity and attempted to climb the tree she was hiding behind. She knew that all the trunks of these mighty Sequoias were large and that branches could not be found till high up but she had to try. The hard, rough, textured bark dug into her skin as she tried to hug the tree and pull her body up using the friction between her hands and the tree. She held in a yelp of pain as she fell to the ground, she could not see her hands but she could feel the warm liquid that coated her palms and fingertips. Jessica looked around the tree with caution and gasped when she saw the faint outline of her little brother Eli waving to her from behind another Sequoia about fifteen yards off. The darkness of the night must have made Eli blind: the only source of light for Jessica and her brother tonight was the dim crescent moon which was hidden behind the expansive black clouds that covered the midnight sky like an enveloping fog. Jessica tried to motion him to leave, but she assumed the worst that he could not see or understand what she was trying to say. She looked to see if the bear was still in the same spot, it was not. As Jessica was about to release a sigh of relief her lungs froze and she could not take in air. Horror filled her when she saw those bright, glowing eyes, emanating ferocity towering above the now tiny figure of her little brother. The bear’s powerful roar seemed to shake the world and it pounded on Jessica’s eardrums. She heard Eli scream but the beast cut him off. Eli’s body was slammed into the tree he was standing by like a rugged rag doll. Jessica heard the slash of the giant’s claws just missing her brother and shredding through the bark of the Sequoia like a saw. Jessica tried to move closer; she had to help her baby brother somehow. She wanted to cry but could not produce a tear or a sound when she watched the bear’s massive paw pound Eli to the ground—this time she knew that this sound was not the cracking of twigs.


The crack of the walnut between the nutcracker’s teeth made Eli giggle and Jessica smiled at her baby brother. She really enjoyed being an older sister now, and she was glad to see that Eli seemed to be enjoying it too. He clapped his small hands awkwardly—this was the first time Jessica had ever seen him clap and she thought that must have been pretty good for a one year old—and Jessica went to grab another walnut out of the bowl. They played in the living room together often now: mother had told Jessica that she needed to watch Eli now that he was not a complete baby anymore; mother had told her to be a good big sister. The stockings hung over the lit fireplace and the tree stood tall in the corner of the room: the gentle light from the fire illuminating the shiny ornaments that clung to the individual bristled branches. Jessica could not wait for Santa to come again this year. She always got such great presents from him, and this year she would be able to share her presents to play with Eli—she really looked forward to that. Jessica could see the moon through the window outside the moon in the dark clear sky; the stars shone brightly, floating in the perfect spots and arrangements to fill one with awe and contentment. Jessica counted the stars in the sky: pointing at each star in succession, pretending to place them in the sky like the hand of God. She quickly turned when she heard Eli’s cry as he had fallen trying to reach for another walnut and Jessica picked him up as best she could and laid him in her lap, rocking him back and forth and stroking his hair. “It’s alright,” she whispered to her brother. “I’m here; I’ll always be here for you.”

The slam of the back door hushed both Eli and Jessica and Jessica slowly guided her brother over to base of the tree: where they were told to wait until their father got home. Mother had been in the kitchen cleaning up from dinner, but now Jessica guessed that her father was home. She could hear her father’s heavy rubber boots stomping across the hardwood floor of the kitchen.

“There you are! It’s about time! I missed you,” Jessica could hear her mother say. “Did you get the presents?”

The pound of father’s fist on the kitchen table shook the whole house. “No I didn’t get them! There’s much bigger problems for me to solve then being Santa Claus for those kids!”

“It’s really not that hard to pick up gifts on the way home Jon!” Jessica heard glass break. “Jon! Stop that!”

“It don’t matter! Mine ‘as well break this too!”

More glass broke. “Jon stop! What do you think you’re doing? That’s Eli’s bottle!” The shrilling screech of her mother’s voice left Jessica’s ears ringing.

“Who cares about the children?” Jessica started to feel tears drown her eyes. “I can barely make ends meet when I’ve got those darn kids that need to be fed, clothed, washed, and all that other stuff parents do, I can’t do it all!”

“What happened today?”

Jessica heard more glass break. “I lost it,” Father spoke slowly, his voice on the edge of growling. “The job, they let me go.”

“What?”

“You heard me!” Father was starting to get to yelling again. “They fired me! Threw me out on the street like trash, and on Christmas Eve! We got no money left!”

Jessica could not tell if the silence was her mother’s surprise, anger, or depression. “Jon,” Jessica never liked it when her mother’s voice sounded like this. “You’ll get another job,” seductive. “You just go on back out there and find you a job again,” but more like a seductive witch trying to get her way. “You just go and get that money so we can pay for those kids, I’ll make it worth your while.” Jessica never liked hearing the way she said that last sentence.

“No, that’s just it.” Jessica did not like the growl coming from her father’s voice. “We won’t have any money for ourselves if we have to pay for those kids first.”

“But don’t you care for those kids? You must admit, they are entertaining every once in a while.”

“Yes, I do care for them,” Father spoke a little hesitantly. “But they’re both young enough still that we can put them into foster care or an orphanage or something.”

“Jon, I don’t want to do that.”

“They would probably take care of the two of them better than I could right now anyway, it seems like the best option for me.”

Jessica could taste the salty tears she had been quietly making. How could he leave? What about Santa? An orphanage? But she had parents, why would she need to go there?

“I will not put those two through the childhood I had to live. Please stay and help me, I need you.”

Jessica was surprised at how sincere she sounded. There was a long silence that seemed to last for hours. “Sue, it’s either me, or the children. If they don’t go, I’m leaving.”

Mother was now gently sniffling between her words. “Jon, no, you’ll stay right here,” Jessica could hear the heavy rubber boots travel closer to the back door. “Jon you can’t leave, stop!” The creak of the back door opening sent a dreary echo through the house. “I love you Jon, don’t leave me! Those kids need you; they need a father. I need you.”

Freezing wind from outside blew through the open door and Eli started to cry. Mother’s sobbing seemed to drown out the sound of the blowing wind. “Good luck, Susan.”

With that the door clicked shut and the sound of her mother falling to the ground sobbing into her hands was all that could be heard now. Jessica could hear her mother saying softly during her crying, “I need you, Jon. Was I not enough? I’m sorry, please come back Jon, come back to me. Love me again.” Eli continued to cry still in Jessica’s lap, but she could not find the courage to keep stroking his hair—she needed someone to stroke her own hair, it took all of her strength to keep another cold bitter tear from streaming down her cheek.


Jessica’s mother stroked her daughter’s hair as they sat together outside the emergency room. The halls were fairly quiet; the only sounds that could be heard were the distant echoing footsteps of hospital employees and the flickering of an occasional light. They had brought Eli here quite a while ago; Jessica guessed that it had been about four hours since the bear attack. Thinking about that bear attack again brought chills down her spine. She had been so afraid; so fearful that that was the end for her little brother. Now they just had to wait until the doctors came to tell them if Eli was going to be alright.

Her mom looked better now—more normal again. She had not cried out of control or blamed Jessica for anything since the bear attack. Jessica hoped that she was better now, she did not like when her mother drank out of the bottle on top of the fridge or when her mother opened any of those old zip-lock bags. Jessica liked it better before her father left: mother did not tell us to close her eyes when she did not do bad things. When they did not listen to the final sips, sniffs, or sighs; when they did not hear their mother tell them after she was done, “Okay, you can open your eyes now. The world is a good place, there are no worries.” Ever since Jessica’s father left, it had been hard for her and Eli. There was less food, less play time, less school gear, less clothing, less happiness. It was hard, but Jessica had to stay strong. She would not give in like her mother; she had to be there for Eli. Eli always had a smile on his face; he would never let anything get to him. Jessica could hardly remember the time when she was like Eli; it was not something she could remember was allowed for her to do. Jessica knew that she had to be the parent; she had to be the guardian; she had to be the one that protected what she saw was so precious to Eli. Not a care in the world; oblivious to the problems in life. He lit up the darkest room, Jessica was the glass that covered his flame—so that the thick immense darkness did not overpower the little flame, the glass would take it all and let the flames light shine through. Like a bright lantern on a stormy night, Jessica intended to make sure that the flame was never extinguished by wind or rain, and that the glass never broke.

“Excuse me, misses?” Jessica looked up and saw a neatly dressed nurse standing in front of their bench.
Her mother stopped stroking Jessica’s hair and set her hand on Jessica’s lap, gently squeezing out her nerves. “My son, is he alright?” It sounded close to being calm and easy, but directly on the edge of bursting into tears.
“Yes, he is awake and stable. You should be able to see him soon, but the doctor’s asked for just a few more minutes,” The nurse studied Jessica’s mother as if she saw right through her attempted bliss. “Don’t be nervous Mrs. Haner, your son is going to be alright. Would you and your daughter like something to drink?”
“Something to drink does sound good,” Jessica’s mother said a little more relaxed. “What do you think Jessica, would you like something to drink?”
“I could use some water,” Jessica replied. With that the nurse guided them to the cafeteria and went to get them some drinks.

Her mother was reaching for the second clear glass bottle on the top of the fridge. She had just broken the first one after clumsily dropping it on the floor and Jessica knew that it was time to go. Jessica went through the house to find her brother as quickly as she could. She could not let her mother find out they were leaving, or that would cause even more trouble with her than Jessica and her brother were already going to get if they stayed around long enough. Jessica could not take being blamed for her father leaving or their low income one more time, and she definitely would not give her mother a chance to blame Eli for anything. Jessica slid down the hardwood floor of the bedroom hallway to cut down on the noise level and took a hard left into Eli’s room. He was playing with his Lego’s in the center of his room. They were really old, a lot of them were broken and they had come from a local church, but he stilled loved them. He was in the middle of building what looked to be a city with a big dinosaur stomping down Main Street.
“Eli quick, we need to go.”
The small frown that came on his face said it all. “We have to go again?”
“Yes Eli, do you want mom to yell at you?”
“No,” He sadly looked down at his Lego city. “But I just finished my city.”
“You can build your city again later. I don’t want you getting hurt.”
“I know,” Eli slowly stood up and put on his boots and coat. “Is it cold outside?”
“It’s really dark and a little chilly, but those boots and coat should be fine for tonight.” Jessica told him while helping get his coat on more quickly. She looked around the room for a way to get outside: she knew they could not go out the back door, front door, or kitchen door because their mother was in the kitchen and they would have to go through the kitchen to get to any of those doors. Jessica looked up and found the window above Eli’s bed. “This will have to do.” She said as the two of them climbed onto his bed. Together they shoved their fingers beneath the window frame to pry in up high enough so that they could crawl out the window and fall into the shaggy bush that lay beneath the window.
“Jessica! Eli! Where are you?” Jessica heard her mother scream from the kitchen. Jessica listened to the awkward clobbering sound of her mother trying to run down the hall to find them. Jessica motioned to Eli that they needed to move fast and they returned to cramming their fingers under the window. Jessica flinched as she felt the quick nasty sting of a splinter slowly entering her right index finger, but she kept pushing; there was no time to cry over a splinter. She could feel the small wood piece sliding into her finger; the sting brought a tear to her eye. The window cracked and slid up about half an inch. Jessica sighed with relief while Eli helped take the splinter out of her finger. They could hear their mother’s footsteps getting closer; the sound of her high heel shoes on the hardwood floor sent shock waves and echoes through the house. Jessica and Eli again turned back to the window and pushed up with all their might. Jessica felt her shoulder crack as she pushed on that old window which seemed as if it were attached to the wall. She heard Eli make a boyish grunt and he pushed the window the rest of the way up, slamming it against the frame above. Jessica chuckled. That boy was getting stronger everyday, she thought to herself. Eli then jumped up, hauling himself out the window, and Jessica heard the snap of branches and the soft thud of her brother landing on the ground. She knew it was not a long fall, probably a little less than six feet. Jessica quickly turned her head to look at the doorway; her mother had not gotten to the room yet. With that little bit of reassurance, Jessica imitated her little brother and hauled herself through the window. The prickly branches of the bush scraped her neck as she feel and branches snapped under her back. She could feel her arms and cheeks getting scratched by the bush, but she did not care.
Eli helped his sister up and they made their way out into the woods. Jessica could hear her mother’s faint screaming getting softer the farther they ran. “Wait, no! Jessica, Eli! I’m sorry! I didn’t mean it! Where are you?” Jessica had heard this before, but she knew that her mother needed more time—she wasn’t normal yet. Jessica and Eli made through and around the trees, and they began to settle down slightly. Resting against the tall branchless tree, they stayed close together; it was very dark outside and it was difficult to see, staying close together was the most comforting option. Their heavy breathing was quickly silenced. Jessica held her breath as she watched a giant black furry mass walking perhaps ten yards in front of them. She did not know what to do; she could get away from her mother but a bear was something else entirely. Jessica went to grab Eli so that he would not try to move but she was too late. The crack of the twigs beneath Eli’s moving foot brought two bright glowing eyes set in their direction. Eli screamed and sprinted off and the glowing eyes flashed to Eli and pursued him. Jessica screamed his name in fear.



“Jessica! Where’d you run off to this time?” Her mother yelled from the end of the hospital hall, turning in circles looking for her daughter. “We had our drink! You don’t need any more!” Jessica sighed and got up from the cafeteria chair and walked toward the direction of the screaming. The screams and yells echoed through the halls and seemed to reverberate off every wall in the hospital. Jessica was surprised staff had not come to tell her mom to quiet down—it would not have been the first time.

“I’m right here mom,” Jessica gave her mother a fake smile and her mother gave her a frown with a raised eyebrow. “Sorry,” Jessica added with a sigh. Her mother gave an approving smile and patted the top of her head. They both turned when the heard the door to Eli’s emergency room open. The doctor was a tall, well built man. He did not look very old, but his clear blue eyes and cleanly kept hair gave Jessica the impression that he was very smart, educated, and organized. This thought made her smile; she was happy to think that the doctor working on Eli was a good doctor. The bottom of the doctor’s white coat fluttered gently as he walked over to where Jessica and her mother were standing. His organized clipboard in hand, it looked like he had all the information he needed about how Eli was.

“Hi, nice to meet both of you,” the doctor said with a smile extending his hand out to Jessica’s mother. “You must be Mrs. Haner,” the doctor smiled while shaking mother’s hand. “And you must be Jessica,” the doctor again smiled and shook Jessica’s hand. His hand was very comforting, Jessica thought. It was a strong handshake, but it was out of respect, not to cause pain.

“So how’s my son?” Her mother asked quickly and demandingly. “What’s wrong with him? Is he going to be okay?”

“Well, Mrs. Haner,”

Jessica did not like the way her mom smiled at the doctor before she spoke. “Please, call me Sue. Or Susan if you’d like to be all sophisticated and fancy like I know you doctor folk are like, so smart.” Jessica really didn’t like the way his mom was looking at the doctor.

Thankfully, the doctor was not returning that smile. His was only out of respect for the patient’s mother. “Mrs. Haner, your son was attacked by a bear. Luckily, from what your daughter Jessica has told me, the bear did not have a chance to attack Eli for long. The major damage done that we can find was most likely from the smack of the bear’s paw on Eli—which again Jessica informed was the only time she knew of that the bear attacked Eli directly,” the doctor looked down to Jessica and gave her a quick friendly wink. Jessica smiled proudly, but still anxiously waiting for the news about the damage. “The paw must have slammed into the right side of his body: we found that he has two broken ribs, his right arm is broken, and his collar bone was out of place. He also must have been hit by the claws; there are some fairly long cuts across his chest and one gash across the face. Please, don’t be concerned. I can assure you, that Eli is going to be alright. He will just need some time to heal his bones and cuts. Now, if you’ll follow me to the room you both can see Eli.” Jessica darted the moment the doctor took his first step towards the emergency room. The doctor’s smooth strides to the door were cool and relaxed. The way the doctor walked made Jessica feel better: he would have been walking much faster if there was something wrong with Eli. The doctor held the door open for the two of them and they walked into the room. The window at the end of the room showed the still black night sky with glistening stars spread across the canvas. The room was not huge, but it wasn’t small either: there was a couch built in to the wall underneath the window for family and friends to sit, there were tools all around the patient bed that was pulled up against the center of the back wall of the room. A flat screen TV was mounted on the wall directly across from the bed. Overall, Jessica thought the room was very nice, but her focus was on the patient in the bed. Eli watching Disney channel made Jessica laugh: he hated Disney channel.

She ran over to the edge of the bed and Eli turned his head and smiled at his sister. “There’s nothing else on,” Eli said jokingly. “And I can’t change the channel.” The two of them laughed together and talked about what the hospital was like. Jessica loved talking to her brother; she felt as if things were right again—that she was back where she was supposed to be. Jessica could hardly hear her mother and the doctor talking by the doorway. “They gave me purple Jell-O earlier: purple Jell-O! You gotta try some it was so good!

“So as you can see Mrs. Haner, your son is alright. But, he will take some time to recover.”

Every worry Jessica had had was gone. She was talking to Eli, and he was talking to her. She would always watch out for her little brother. They remarked at how bright the stars outside were.

“The brace for his collar bone should help set it back in place in just a week. His cast on his right arm however will need close to a month to heal.”

Jessica helped Eli point at the different stars. Eli would call out and describe the star he was thinking of and Jessica would have to guess which one he was thinking of and point his hand to it. Jessica loved playing this game.

“We’ve stitched the cuts on Eli’s face and chest. They were not too severe, but the stitching should help make the healing process cleaner.”

“Nope! Try again!” Eli said as Jessica shifted his pointing finger to the second biggest star in the sky.

“His ribs will heal as well; he should stay in bed for at least a week. After that, he’ll be free to move around again—except for his right arm of course.”

“Yep! That’s the one!” Jessica patted herself on the back in her mind.

“Mrs. Haner, what is that in your pocket?”

“Now it’s my turn!” Jessica exclaimed with a grin-like smirk on her face. Eli was always bad at finding the star she picked.

The rustling of an old zip-lock baggie was the only sound that came from their mother. “Mrs. Haner if you would please step into my office I would like to talk more in depth about your, situation.”

The office door clicked shut. “Come on Jess! You’ve got to be cheating,” Eli said after his fourth failed attempt of finding the star. Jessica giggled; she was so good at this game. Jessica could somewhat hear the doctor talking from his office. She caught words like “addiction”, “rehab”, “health insurance”, “custody”, “lawyers”, but she didn’t care. The only thing that mattered in her world right now was that Eli was safe and smiling. Jessica knew she would watch over him, she had always known that. But she would not treat it like a burden; it was never a burden to her. She would not let the world break her like glass; she would not let the world shatter her. Eli’s flame would not go out because there was no one to protect him. She would be his guardian, his protector, his parent.

“I give up,” Eli said. “You win.”

“Like always,” Jessica laughed while she ruffled up his hair.

“When will we get to go home?” Eli asked looking at Jessica with innocent eyes.

She stroked his hair and smiled reassuringly. “Soon, Eli. We’ll be back home before you know it.” Hearing this Eli smiled and slowly, tiredly, nestled his head as best he could into his pillow and closed his eyes. Jessica pulled up his blankets and gently tucked him in. “I’ll always be here for you.”


Jessica wanted to run to Eli’s side and help him up, help him escape, but did not know how to do it. The bear towered over her brother who was sprawled around the base of the tree. She did not know if he was unconscious or not, but it did not matter. The glowing eyes of the bear looked down at its prey. It quickly looked back up and searched at the loud echoing sound of the smacking of wood against wood. Jessica could feel the sting in her forearms from the shock of hitting that branch against the trunk of the Sequoia. Her plan had somehow worked, the bear started to walk away from her fallen brother and towards the sound of the smack. It did not travel far though; Jessica guessed that it did not want to entirely leave the prey it had just spent so much energy stopping. A loud smack echoed through the woods again. The bear took a few more steps closer. Jessica could feel cool sweat beginning to run down her back. Smack. The bear took another step. Jessica was not sure if she should move to a different tree or not, the bear was beginning to look quite larger. Then a gunshot silenced all. Flashlights and the yells of people came from the direction Jessica and her brother had run from. The lights were getting closer; the yells were getting louder. She began to recognize the some of the voices as many of her neighbors. A second gunshot brought an ear drum rattling roar from the bear before it ran off. The instant the bear starting running away Jessica began sprinting towards her fallen brother. While running she looked to her right to see all the people that had come. Her mother was being supported by two other women to help her get out here and it looked as if all of the men from their neighborhood came with guns and flashlights. Her mother must have heard the roars from the bear and asked the neighbors to help her get out to the woods. Jessica wondered how drunk her mom was when she asked but did not think about it for long—Eli needed her. She got down to Eli and flipped him over unto his back and placed his head on her lap. She could not see how bad any of his injuries were, but she would not let him worry about his injuries. She laid her head against his chest: he was breathing. Jessica let out a huge sigh of relief and stroked Eli’s hair.

Jessica heard a small, almost inaudible whisper that sounded as if it were hard to produce. “Jess? Is that you?”

Tears started to come to Jessica’s eyes. “Yes Eli, it’s me,” the smile on her face almost made her cheeks sore. “But don’t talk, just rest. Everything’s is going to be alright, I’m here.” She saw Eli smile and he closed his eyes slowly and gently, resting his head on Jessica’s lap. Jessica took off her jacket and placed it on top of Eli, tucking him in for calm, comforting night’s rest.