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20 September, 2012
High School: a mixture of the want to stand out and the want to fit in. High School was the start of who you were, you were either popular or you weren’t. Hot or not. Fortunately for me, I possessed both good sides of this wonderful theory. I liked hearing my name being shouted across the hallway. I liked the way the girls all looked at me. I liked coming home from school and seeing my phone filled with texts and party invites. All aspects of my life were glorified. Monty Knight was here to stay. Being a well-known junior in highschool, my name bounced off the lips of many cliques. Was it my charisma? Was it my famous smile or my tanned skin? Was it the large quantity of touchdowns that I brought to the scoreboard? Maybe. Or yes.
I turned down the hallway, heading to my next class. All the attention was on me. As usual. 5th period chemistry wasn’t the easiest, especially since I was in honors chemistry. I sat down at my desk and noticed that I had a new lab partner. It was obvious that she wasn’t exactly normal. Or the prettiest. Her pale moon-like skin contrasted against her long pink hair. Added to her look was a wide variety of piercings all over her ears and face. She was wearing way too much eyeliner under eyes and an interesting color of eye shadow. She was wearing tight black skinny jeans with a red button-down shirt and a lime green tie. On her feet she wore very old and worn-down sneakers. I think she noticed me observing her because she immediately struck up conversation.
“May I help you?” Being the polite individual that I was, I just smiled and insisted that I was just looking out the window.
“There aren’t any windows in this room.”
“Class take your seats.” Good thing Mr. Manson walked in. I had no idea what to say to this freak.
“I’m Jenna.” She smiled.
“Monty. Monty Night...” I said trying to signal to her that I was clearly uninterested in this conversation that she was trying to start.
“Cool name. Well, I just moved here from New York.”
“Fascinating,” I replied. I really didn’t want to talk to her. I didn’t even know her, but she had to be weird if she walks out in public looking like that. Mr. Manson continued his lecture on the effects on ecosystems while I sat there contemplating how a girl as nice as her could walk around wearing that. Her style definitely didn’t fit my definition. Suddenly, I felt a touch on my shoulder. It was from Mark Tabolt, some kid who sat behind me. What did he want?
“Here,” He said lamely. He stuck a small, white note into my hand. I turned around and opened it. From the pink ink and fancy letters that ran all around the page, I could tell it was from Courtney Dymond. Courtney was by far the prettiest and most popular girl in school. She hung around all the other preppy girls and she showed an abnormally large interest in me. Then again, who doesn’t? I turned to her direction and showed her my award-winning smile. I began to read:
‘Who's the freak?’ it read. I quickly jotted down that she was from the circus of New York. I passed it back to Mark. Courtney read it, wrote something down, and passed it back.
‘Well her clothes fit the act. EW. ‘
‘Yeah she’s definitely a freak of nature’ I wrote down. I turned around to pass it back to Mark when suddenly it was abruptly snatched out of my hand.
“Mr. Night, are you writing notes in my class?” announced Mr. Manson.
“Uhh..” Before I knew it, he was reading it in front of everybody. When he was finished, I looked over at Jenna in horror. She sat there without expression. Her eyes refused to meet mine, yet she remained still as if nothing bad was happening. BEEP. BEEP. BEEP. BEEP. Saved by the bell! I rushed out of class and dashed to my locker. I hope she moves back to New York before tomorrow…
That night, as I laid in bed, for some reason I couldn’t stop thinking about Jenna. From the way she looked after the note was read out loud. Expressionless. Almost as if she didn’t even care. But how could she not care? I said she belonged in the circus for crying out loud! Yet she sat there like nothing was happening!
The next day, I walked into chemistry to see Jenna sitting at her desk. I walked over and sat down. I tried my best to avert my eyes from hers but guilt got the best of me.
“Look....I...” I started but was immediately interrupted.
“It’s totally fine. I’m used to it,” She smiled, then turned away.
“Oh, well I just thought I should apologize. That’s all.”
Class started and Mr. Manson began to teach. How is what I did to her only ‘fine’? I embarrassed her in front of our entire chemistry class. And all she did was smile at me and tell me that everything’s fine? Something has got to be wrong with this chick. I still felt bad about it. If I said that about any other girl at this school, they would never talk to me or even look at me again. She was definitely different from everyone I knew. And I knew a lot of people. She seemed real, like she didn’t care what people thought of her. Like she could be herself around everyone. That was a new factor to a person that I never came across before. Should I get to know her?
“Hey uh, Jenna, can you help me-”
“Shh. Monty, no talking,” Mr.Manson hissed at me. She gave me a clueless look on her face like I was speaking a different language. I grabbed a paper out of my binder and wrote:
‘Hey can you help me on this evolution crap?’ I slowly slid it over to her side of the table; I didn’t want to get caught passing notes with her. She smiled and wrote down:
‘Sure, when?’ Should I ask her to come over and help? But, if anyone saw me with her they might to start to think I was weird like her. I’ll think of a plan to sneak her over where no one will see her walk in.
‘My house, at 6?’
‘Sure thing, see you then.’ Once I got that note back I ripped it into tiny little pieces, just in case someone got a hold of it and read that I invited Jenna Smith over to my house.
Dang! I forgot to tell her where I lived! I will figure something out by the time school is over. I’m going to my last class with my boys by my side when Jenna turns the corner. Oh no! Don’t come up to me, don’t come up to me, PLEASE don’t come up to me. But she did anyways.
“Hey Monty where do you-” I cut her off.
“Who are you?” I demanded and glanced at my boys and give them a clueless look as if I had no idea why she was even talking to me.
“Uh,Jenna? From Chemistry?” She asked looking at me with a furrowed brow and suspicious eyes.
“Oh well, I got to go, bye!” I said breezing by her.
“What is up with her?” Josh, one of my friends asked.
“I have no clue! That was weird..But oh well, she probably just wanted to talk to me. But forget her.” How was I supposed to make that up to her? First I embarrassed her, now I completely acted like I had no clue who she was, and no interest and finding out. I need to find her, and talk to her alone.
For the first time I was hoping to see her in the halls. I did, as I left last bell. I pulled her into a closet.
“I’m sorry about how I acted, back there.”
“Its fine I get it. You are too worried about your reputation, and what people will think about you if you are seen talking to me.” She said with tension in her voice.
“So you get it?”
“Yeah I get it, But, I’m but I’m not going to sneak around talking to you. You can either get over yourself, and talk to me, or you can forget about me, and don’t even bother talking to me.”
I was shocked. No one has ever talked like that to me before.
“No, I want to talk to you.” I actually did want to. She was really cool, and fun to be around. But I don’t know if I want to give up my reputation.
“Then prove it.” She quickly responded. How? What do I do?
“Come to my house tonight still.” I said while handing her a paper that had my address on it.
“Fine,” She walked out the closet and shut the door in my face. How? How can a girl be that forgiving? How could she not hate me by now? Maybe she was right. Maybe I do need to get over myself? That was all going through my head when I was waiting for her to come over. Wait, do I actually like her? She’s not the type I usually go for. I would never even think about going out with someone like that, it just wasn’t normal for that type of thing to happen. Maybe I do like her? No one has ever been so real to me. No one would ever tell me that I only think about myself, and how I thought no one was better than me. They wouldn’t care. They would just be happy I talked to them.
I sat at my desk, wildly anticipating Jenna‘s arrival. When the doorbell rang, I flew down the stairway faster than a cheetah. What was wrong with me? I never get nervous in front of girls! I finally pulled myself together and opened the door.
“Hey.” I said looking at her more closely. She is actually pretty.
“Hi! Is there something wrong?” She must have seen me staring.
“Oh no, nothing. Come in.”
“Have you decided what you’re going to do yet?” She asked while she was walking behind me, following me up the stairs. Once she said that, I instantly spun her around and kissed her. It just as I thought it would be.
“I choose you.” I said staring in her eyes. Her eyes were big and her face was as red as a rose. But she immediately came back for another kiss.
“Yes. I want you, you are different from everyone. What you said today, it made me realized how I thought of myself and how I thought that how people viewed me was all that mattered. But, it doesn’t. When I first saw you, I knew you were different. How you didn’t care about what people thought, when Mr.Manson read that note out loud, you really didn’t mind that we were saying that stuff. I want to be like you. And I want to be with you.” I said confidently.
“Finally someone has realized why I don’t care!” She exclaimed while tippy toes to kiss me.
That school year was the best school year of my life! Jenna and I dated and didn’t care if people knew about. But out of all of this, I learned that you don’t need to conform to what everybody is saying or doing just to be involved with someone who isn’t. Love is blind and you can choose to either be sad and not be yourself, or be happy and be yourself. Fortunately for me, I was given both good sides of this wonderful theory.