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Life is a masquerade Part two
The room remains silent as all eyes, green, brown and blue focus upon me.
“Who did that to you Kasey? Are you cutting yourself?” Kiera grabs my legs, the tears pour faster and quicker down my now washed out face, the mascara smudges into my cheeks, dripping down my chin. I squirm.
She looks at me with a deadly glance. It seems bizarre why she would give me that look but I can tell she is frightened. Her sharp eyebrows come to a frown.
“I’m tired!” I say softly, my throat tight and sore with the cries.
She gives a look of disgust and disbelief. I never ignore her. I tell her everything.
“Kasey? Why won’t you tell me what’s going on?” She yells.
“It’s nothing I promise, I didn’t want to say anything because I knew you’d all react like this!”
“What happened?” Her tone becomes sharp. Jennette looks at me with fright in the background.
“Okay fine... You know that camping trip I went on with my cousins from France?” I ask, they all nod as if they are programmed to do so. “Well we were down by the lake, playing on this tire swing and I swung too hard and fell off it onto the rocks, there were twigs in the water and they cut my legs. I was lucky I didn’t break my back!”
Lies. Lies. All lies.
“Why didn’t you just say? We all thought someone had been hitting you!” Maya says with a tone of relief.
“Oh no...” I give a slight giggle. “I felt foolish having to tell you I fell off a tire swing!”
“You are such a clumsy person! Good job you didn’t hit your head on those things!” Kiera laughs.
They believe me. The panic decreases.
Blindly the sun shines through my pallid sallow coloured curtains, leaving a ray of light upon my double bed. I awake. I stretch my hands up, yawning before I kick of the great duvet cover. This is the first day of college. The first day of a fresh beginning.
I make my way towards the bathroom upon the landing, slowly staggering like a snail. I look up at the mirror; my face is the only thing that isn’t bruised. Thank goodness! I grab for my great metal-combed brush, dragging the tats out of my wavy hair. Then I brush my teeth before putting my make up on. You aren’t allowed lots of makeup at this college, only minimal -something that I am not used too nowadays. The pale foundation is almost like a mask up on me, I’m not used to this face!
My thick grey hoodie clothes my arms and chest. I am hidden once more by fabric. My skinny black jeans have the same affect on my legs.
The corridors look humongous compared to the ones at the high school; I feel as if I blend in amongst the crowd as a mass of people surround me, they don’t seem to look like the cliques that we were in. In fact people here more or less look the same.
“Hey!” I hear a familiar voice. I turn to see the handsome narrowed brown eyes looking at me mysteriously. It was Luke. I gulp.
“Hi Luke!” I say with a sickly feeling in the pit of my stomach.
“Don’t I get a kiss off my girl?” He says sharply. I smile faintly... my parched lips press against his unusually soft ones. I wonder if he can feel it! The fright...
“You still coming to mine tonight?” he asks me. I nod. “Good!” He smiles with the smile that I fell in love with a year and a bit ago, the one that now scares me half to death when I see it. “Bye babe!” He walks off as one of my friends approach.
“Hey Kasey! Are you okay?” Perry asks observantly, she is as good as telling people’s feelings as I am lies.
“Fine it’s just pre-college nerves!” I laugh. She giggles with a girlish tone although Perry is actually the tomboy of the group, she has short choppy hair dyed auburn red, and her makeup usually consists of black eye shadow and deep red lipstick. She could pass for a Goth, it she didn’t wear the bright yellows and greens she loves so much.
The first day goes well; I am surprised about the ton of work I already have to complete although I would have to wait until I got back from Luke’s to do so.
Luke pulls up at my drive-way, its quarter to eight. He’s half an hour late. I lock myself out of the house, my parents are on vacation. As I take a seat by him in the car, he once again leans in for a kiss. My heart pounds heavily against my chest! I can’t breathe as he pulls me closer.
“What’s wrong?” he asks looking startled.
“Nothing...” I say, smiling. He kisses me again.
Luke’s house is enormous compared to mine and even compared to Kiera’s too; the windows are great and rounded with pretty stain glass on the loft ones- Luke’s room. The ceramic flooring decorates the conservatory and chef-style kitchen, a large leather corner sofa in the beautifully decorated living room. He takes me down to the basement by my hand, which has been converted into a sort of lounge and gaming room. Sitting in front of the electronic blue fire- not the most homely kind either is Luke’s ‘pretty-boy’ cousin Brett and his ‘girlfriend’- Brett had a new girlfriend every couple of months since the age of about fifteen. On the couch, Danny- Luke’s best friend and my friend Denise sit cuddled up. I smile. I wish I was like that with Luke. I wish...
“So babe how was your first day of college?” Luke asks, placing his hefty hand around my aching shoulders. He waited until now to ask me that... he was all for show.
“It was great! Much better than I expected!” I reply, for once truthfully. Denise grins at me, loosening from Danny’s grip.
“Glad to hear it! Apparently Kiera isn’t having such a good time at her new college!” she chats to me. “You’re taking literature aren’t you?”
“Yeah...” I start although Luke interrupts me.
“Well I think we’ve had enough school talk for the past thirteen years or so! Don’t you think it’s about time we had some fun?” He laughs, turning up the music on his IPod dock loudly.
“Actually, I have to do some stuff for collage, I can’t stay long! I say.
“Babe, you don’t have classes tomorrow, you’re eighteen have some fun!” He shouts, that smirk upon his face as he grabs my hand tightly, his dark eyes lowered.
“O...Okay!” I stutter...
The night passes by quickly, it reminds me a bit of that prom night when all I could think about was my bruises and pain, again I am masked by my tan and clothes and the fake grin up on my face. Deep inside my stomach curdles, I feel so ill... eventually the games are over and people start to leave. Finally it is just me and Luke alone. The fright builds up inside of me. I feel the need to vomit!
“What’s up with you tonight?” Luke asks harshly.
“Nothing...” I stutter again.
“Nothing? You’ve had a face on you all night, people will think something’s up!” he says.
“Something is up!” I mutter, he hears me.
“You’re so ungrateful, do you know that? I love you, I invite you to parties, I pay to go out with you and buy you things and you go around saying something’s wrong!” suddenly he bawls at me, kicking at the empty paper cups on the floor towards me. “You need to learn that the world doesn’t revolve around you and your feelings. This is my life Kasey and you’re not going to ruin it!”
“Your life?” I laugh half screeching. “This isn’t just your life! This is my life and everybody else’s lives too!You aren't better than anybody else so stop acting as if you are Luke!” I stop, the tears filling up my already red eyes, I shouldn’t have said anything.
The rage builds up in his eyes, his hands heavy as they cut deep into my skin of my stomach, I try to duck down, yet his fist slams into my cheekbones. I yelp in pain, curled upon the floor.
The world freezes for a few moments. I see his feet moving towards me. He holds me by the hands, dragging me up into his grip, my tears pouring down my skin and again I feel his lips upon mine. He turns to me and says. “You know I love you right?”