December 16, 2011
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Really? I know you saw what happened. It’s not like you happened to glance over and just walk passed. You watched. For once, I thought you might be there for me. But, once again, you acted like the passive person you are.

Have I not been loyal to you throughout my entire life? You know, this happened because I was getting your kite. “For you, a thousand times over.” I meant those words to you, but now I don’t even know if you’re worth it. Clearly I’m not worth it to you if you’re really that phlegmatic while you watch your best friend being raped.

Do I embarrass you? Did I do something wrong? Was I not there for you? What was it? “For you, a thousand times over.” I would have saved you in a heartbeat. When we’re together, you act like we’re the best of friends. Yet, when it comes to being around other people, you act differently. You see everyone, accept me.

I won’t mention this to anyone. In my heart, I could never tell on you. Even though I don’t know what the reason is for you not helping me, you must have had a reason. I wish I could have hatred towards you. I wish I could just go to Baba or Ali or someone. But in my heart, I can’t. “For you, a thousand times over.”

This is hurting me, you know. I can’t keep it inside, I so badly need to tell someone. But, I’d rather hold it all in than get you in trouble. Honestly, what kills me the most is that you won’t even talk to me. Really? It should be me the one not talking to you. So, you’ll watch me get beaten half to death, and not say one thing to me? Act like nothing happened?

I can’t answer to you as to why I still continue to be loyal to you. I don’t know why I still try to brush it off and act as a friend to you. I’m the one who needs the friend. You can’t even be there for me when I need you.

People are telling me you’re leaving. They say you’re going to America with Baba. You’re really just going to leave like that? How is that I do everything I can to be good for you, and all the bad happens to me? Yet, you’re blessed with the good life. Here is my parting word to you, Amir. Karma.

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