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That Fairytale Ending

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I like Michael Reader. There. That wasn’t so bad, right? Just a few easy strokes of my fingers on a keyboard, and the truth is out.

Such a simple, innocent act, but so much is changed. The fantasy I live in, the dreams I dream, are now worming their way into my pristine reality. When I see him, I see the smile that I imagined the night before in my sleep. I see his eyes, sparkly and blue, twinkling in the moonlight on a beach. I see his hands, holding my own, watching the clouds float past in the soft summer breeze. I see more than is really there.

So much is hurt, for I know that the chances of any of these fantasies are none. He’ll never see me that way, this is certain. He’ll never imagine me in a different light, never hope to see me in a different way. To him, I’ll always be sweet, careful Kayleen. I’ll always be the nice and silly, yet so confused and complicated, girl that sits next to him during first hour, second semester. I’ll always be the girl who curses herself for ever falling for him, knowing nothing could ever happen.

The truth has escaped, and so are the tears that were restrained. How could I let this happen? It’s ridiculous, absurd, even. I was always a smart girl, never one to dream too big or hope too high. Life has always kept my wishes within reach, within the grasps of reality.

Terrified, I’m wondering if I’ll ever be over him. Maybe I’ll spend my entire life liking him, wasting chances for adventure and travel, opportunity and experience, and most of all, chances to be loved. Chances to turn my fantasies of walking down a moonlit beach, watching clouds float above on a warm summer day, into my reality, my life.

I like Michael Reader. That tiny little sentence, spoken in irrevocable words, typed in indelible ink, or whispered in lingering thoughts, has the power to undermine my reality, tear it to shreds, and create a monster in my mind, laughing at my despair. That tiny, four-letter claim comes with responsibility, certain obligations I have, especially to myself. Obligations to live a life full of happiness, love, loyalty, and honesty. With the admittance of this little absurdity, I’ve shattered those responsibilities, and I’m desperately trying to recover the pieces, to reconstruct the meaning of those words.

It’s not like I’ll ever tell him. He’ll never find out about my little secret! The glancing from the corner of my eyes, the blushes, the shy smiles, it’s all a part of me he will never know existed. The dreams, the wishes, the thoughts; they’ll always be kept locked inside my heart, never to escape. And the worst part is, I’ll always secretly wish and dream that he has secret thoughts locked away, too, despite the fact that I know he doesn’t. I’ll always be waiting for that fairytale ending, unable to ever start a beginning.



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This article has 15 comments. Post your own!

Love.Hate.Passion. said...
Aug. 8, 2011 at 6:09 pm:

As teens , so many of us are in the position of caring for someone who doesn't care for us. The stories that some of us write about those emotions are cliche.This however ,was not. I suppose it's because you are a writer , and a touch of that made this amazing. You expressed unrequited love beautifully with emotion. I thoroughly enjoyed reading this , and was appreciate of how relatable it was. It's well -written and marvelous. Great ...no....AMAZINGLY FANTASTICALLY SUPERB job!

 <... (more »)

 
DoubleN replied...
Aug. 8, 2011 at 6:57 pm :
thank-you SO much for this :)
 
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TheSilverLaurel said...
Jul. 22, 2011 at 12:33 pm:
this is amazing, the ending is really emotional. 5stars
 
DoubleN replied...
Jul. 22, 2011 at 1:14 pm :
Thank-you :)
 
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Medina D. said...
Jul. 18, 2011 at 12:11 pm:

When it comes to realistic fiction i think this story hits the target! :) Only i dont think a lot of girls would describe their crushes like Kayleen, and thats because this story was told with a writer's touch.

The 2nd to last paragraph, to me, was like the intelligent scene in the story, and the last paragraph the most emotional.

but overall, it was great

 
DoubleN replied...
Jul. 18, 2011 at 10:13 pm :
Thanks! the whole logic-versus-emotions was kinda what i was aiming for, so this is good :)
 
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JustAnotherOwl said...
Jul. 13, 2011 at 11:32 am:
This was lovely! It's intelligently written (if "intelligently" is even a word...). I agree with CarrieAnn13; you captured the emotion perfectly. You are really talented as a writer! The wording is wonderful, never sounding awkward or having choppy sentence. If I read through again and find something to criticize, I'll let you know, but for now I don't have any complaints! (:
 
DoubleN replied...
Jul. 13, 2011 at 2:19 pm :
Thank-you :) It means so much and is so motivating to get such good feedback! And please, if you find anything to criticize, let me know!
 
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Megan.J.B said...
Jul. 12, 2011 at 10:57 am:
Very well, done and very sweet! This wasn't cliched and that's something about these sort of stories that I often see, but this was superb! :) Well done
 
DoubleN replied...
Jul. 13, 2011 at 2:20 pm :
Thanks :) This kind of feedback is so inspiring and motivating!
 
Megan.J.B replied...
Jul. 13, 2011 at 6:13 pm :
Well I'm glad I helped motivate you! :)
 
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TwasBrilling said...
Jun. 23, 2011 at 11:51 am:
This is really great writing! Keep it up!
 
DoubleN replied...
Jun. 23, 2011 at 1:52 pm :
Thank-you :)
 
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CarrieAnn13 said...
Jun. 22, 2011 at 8:58 pm:
Wow, this is great!  You captured the emotions of unrequited love amazingly.  Good job! :)
 
DoubleN replied...
Jun. 22, 2011 at 9:01 pm :
Thank-you :)
 
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