May 2, 2011
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“AAAHH!!!” Joe Igguleski screams. “A SPIDER! A SPIDER! A SPIDER!!!” he runs downstairs to Mom and Dad, still yelling. “Mom! Dad! There was a huge spider in my room! It must’ve been a half a foot long! It was going to eat me!”

“It was just your imagination, Joseph.” Mom says calmly. “Go back up to your room and go to sleep.”
Joe goes back up into his room, and on the floor is his brother, Mike, laughing so hard that he was crying. “So it was YOU who put the spider on my nose! “You’re going to get it for this!” Joe strikes. Mike is still cracking up on the floor.
“It’s all about timing, my friend.” Mike explains. “You were talking about spiders eating you in your sleep, so I took my toy spider and put it on you. Apparently, you woke up approximately…37 seconds after I attempted the prank. Gotcha! ”
“I hate you so much.” Joe mutters.

The next day in high school, it was picture day. Joe is wearing his best clothes: a green vest and corduroy pants. Mike takes his brother out in the hall. “Step right up to see the ‘Mazing Mike Igguleski!” Mike exclaims. “Do we have any volunteers? How about you?” Mike says as he throws Joe next to him. “Hold this egg for me, will you?” Mike puts an egg in his brother’s hands. Mike takes out his wand. “Now, I will make the egg disappear! One… two…three!” He hits the wand on the egg in Joe’s hand. Crack! The egg explodes and there’s yolk and the albumen are splattered all over Joe’s vest and pants.
“You did that on purpose!” Joe whimpers as he runs down the hallway, crying. “I hate you even if you didn’t exist.”
A week later, Joe and Mike get their report cards.
Mike opens up his report card. “All right! Straight A’s! And look! My lowest grade is a 97 in science! And my highest grade is Math with 100! This is great because the NYS Math Assessment is coming up!” He shouts. “Hey, Joe! What did you get in math?”
Joe whimpers. “Uh…I got a 67.”
“Ouch…tough luck,” Mike says. “Well, I’m going to play basketball with Bob. Bye.”
After dark, Mike comes home and his mom talks to him.
“Mike, since the math assessment is coming up, I wasn’t you to tutor your brother.” Mrs. Igguleski explains. “I want him to do well, and I know you want him to do, too.
“I know, and I’ll try to teach him the methods of Pythagorean Theorem… Graphing Linear Equations, one and two step equations, and…
“I get it,” Mrs. Igguleski interrupts. “Just do your best.”
The next day, Mike catches up to Joe and talks to him about tutoring him.
“Why do you want to tutor me? You’re mean to me!” Joe questions.
“Joe, I want you to pass.” Mike explains.
“I won’t let you! I can pass the test by myself!”
“Fine. I‘ll make up all the bad things I did for you in the past month.”
“Are you serious?”
“I swear. “I’ll start by doing the dishes tonight.”
“Thanks Mike. I might need help after all.”
That night, Mike does the dishes and then explains the Pythagorean Theorem.
“Oh, I get it!” Joe realizes. “a2 + b2 = c2!”
“Tomorrow, I’m going to clean your room and then teach you one step and two step equations. Good night.” Mike yawns.

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