Innocence is Ignorance

March 9, 2011

Childhood innocence or child hood ignorance either way it’s basically the same thing. And either way it’s fun to exploit. Tell a five year old he was adopted and he may not believe you. But tell him you found him on mars in a giant cocoon and it might seem a little bit more logical to him. Here is his reasoning: “I don’t know what adoption is so I can’t be adopted. But I know what a cocoon is and I think I went to Mars last summer so; maybe she did find me on mars. Don’t baboons come out of cocoons? I must be a monkey. My dad never let our dog Reggie sleep in the house, no animals in the house, it’s a rule. Well, if its rule then maybe I needs to sleep in the garage tonight”. No need in going into detail. Your parents find your little brother in the garage eating stale dog food and all of a sudden you’re grounded. Happens to all of us, right?
But this story isn’t about stale dog food or giant cocoons its really about my little brothers tendency to believe the unbelievable and his ability to totally disregard anything that sounds remotely sensible. Plus his uncanny sense of literacy. Not the type of literacy that they make you takes classes on and expects you not to fall asleep in. Honestly though, it’s kind of hard to sleep with a five year old crying in the garage. Try explaining that to our teacher. I’m telling you, you would swear detention was my home room.
But on a more serious note. I’m really telling you this because of an observation I’ve been doing lately. Literacy and my brother go hand and hand. I told him that meat is made from animal, so him being the gentle man that he is, had to talk to it. Hey, I wasn’t going to tell him it was dead. I thought it was funny at first but it got odd when he would talk to pastries, and scary when he would talk to crayons. One time I think he made the orange one cry. Most people have a problem talking to themselves, but my not my little brother. He has a problem talking to random objects. Most little kids play with food, but this kid, he’d rather hold a conversation with it about his stay in the garage. He’ll never let it go. It wasn’t that cold, it was November for goodness sake! And he didn’t have to eat stale dog food. There was a fresh bag of kitty litter that he so rudely ignored! I’m just saying, Its minty fresh.
For the most part I think My brothers verbal skills is what make him so odd in the first place. My little brother Robert was born with a lung defect and a speech impediment that took years of therapy to help. He was very quit for most of his childhood years. I was his voice. After having a child like that only a cruel sense of karma would give you one like Jeremiah. Five years of silence could only be followed by five years of crying the garage. He’s just a character. He pulls stunts all the time. Like Beating up fourth graders when he was in Kindergarten. The kid came out of nowhere rounding the corner coming from lunch, then bam, three foot tall John Sena pins him to the ground. But he’s not just a little brother; he’s also a high-tech spy cam. He once tried to beat up a guy for talking to me. The guy was in eighth grade and my bro was in kindergarten. Guys have to check with Jeremiah first before the y get to me. He cried when my cousin went off to prom. And made his point very clear. NO KISSING! What can I say? The kids a character and I love him.

The author's comments:
This is a tribute to childhood ignorence, and the hilarious moments in life that it brings

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