Okay so this is the thing, I may have a tiny little problem with my shopping habits. But, I mean, I am going to need that waffle maker sometime! …. Well maybe I don’t exactly know how to make waffles but I could learn! And that black coach handbag, I am definitely going to use that next time I go to a wedding. Hmm, I don’t really know anyone who is getting married. Still I think it was a good investment! Who knows maybe it will be worth millions in a couple years!

My fiancé seems to think that I shop too much. I don’t think that is the case, I buy what I absolutely need and could not live without. I still have ample room to store stuff in the office. Ethan just doesn’t understand. Whatever, he will be thrilled when I come home today with a brand new polo shirt for him!
***

Oh my gosh. This store is fabulous! I was immediately aghast when I walked in. To be honest when my best friend, Tiffany, told me about this store it didn’t sound plausible. Wow I was so wrong. This store has EVERYTHING. The only drawback is that it is so crowded and the sales person is inaudible over the hundreds of voices.
“Where are the polo shirts?” I basically scream at the sales person.
He gives a nod of understanding, “Isle 7 next to the Red bottom Shoes.”
“Thanks!”

I can’t helping running through the store, just hearing that there are red bottom shoes in this building makes me intrigued. I just need another pair of shoes! I will be coveted by everyone! Red bottoms shoes are so in right now! My heart is thumping with excitement! The epitaph on my gravestone will say, Girl with the Red Bottom Shoes.

I am in close proximity to them … Wait. I am supposed to be here to get Ethan a new shirt. But I am sure he wouldn’t mind if I got something for myself too, right? Fiancé’s are supposed to want their soon-to-be wives to be happy! And red bottom shoes would make me REALY happy right now. To be honest I think I am being very ethical.

By the time I leave the store I am feeling so great! I open the front door to our apartment and Ethan is sitting on the sofa.
“Hi Sweetheart …” He immediately stops when he see’s my numerous shopping bags. OKAY maybe I bought more than just shoes and a shirt, but the dress matched perfectly …
“I bought you something!” I say, nearly cowering. Great, he is looking at me in a disappointed way.
“You always buy something. “ He says with no emotion. That is SO not true I don’t always buy something….
“I am not being facetious. You are indiscriminate when it comes to shopping.” He finishes.
“Well …” I try to think of a comeback but I feel too tired. Shopping really wears you out!
“Well?” he asks
“Well, shopping should be in the Olympics! I will submit the idea and then we will become rich! And then I can buy whatever I please!”
Ethan nearly falls down laughing, “I love you”
“I know.” I say with a smile
___________
Alright so I know that Ethan told me to cut back on my shopping sprees but I really need a new dress for my interview tomorrow. You see I am interviewing to be on the magazine staff of Vogue. If I get this job it will be perfect! I will get to meet celebrities and do articles on clothes and shopping! God, this is job is practically made for me!
Ethan doesn’t understand that I need to get a new outfit for this. I mean, I will cut back, right after I buy this outfit. This is clearly a special occasion.
I let all my thoughts drift away as I walk into the oversized Macys. Wow I kinda forgot how crowded it is here, I have lived in New York for a while so you would think that I would be used to the commotion. I love being surrounded with so many shops! It is wonderful, except when your fiancé puts you on a budget.
I still hate that word. It sounds like something that the secret service would say to an intruder or something.
Whatever, time to start shopping!
______________
“Ethan!” I scream as I walk inside of the apartment
“Yes?” He says questionably
“You cut off all my credit cards! Even my visa!”
Silence.
“I am so mad right now” I stopped my foot and crossed my arms.
Silence.
“Aren’t you going to say anything? Maybe an ‘I’m sorry”?”
Silence.
“You know what fine! I don’t care I will just get another card.”
Why isn’t he answering me? He looks like he is in pain or something. Ugh, why does he have to look so cute, I want to hug him and tell him that everything is okay and I am not mad. I wouldn’t be lying, I am not mad, I am livid. Does he not know how important this interview is? I could meet all the celebrities! Does this not matter to him?
He opens his mouth, ready to speak, but then closes it again.
“I’m leaving …” I say and pick up my Prada bag.
This catches his attention, “No, wait.”
“I’m listening?” I say in the most I am so mad right now voice.
“I thought you would try to buy something so I cut off your cards and then the bills for all of them came in.” He said while plopping the envelopes on the table.
“So…” I say
“Have you looked at the total?” He asked
I bend down to pick up one of the bills. Surely it can’t be that bad.
Oh. My. God.
OK maybe it can be that bad, but okay it is only one bill! The other ones won’t be this much money.
….
All I see is dollar signs. Dollar signs are only a good thing when it comes to paychecks. Wow, with all I spent I must have helped out the economy a lot. Hmm that is a good excuse! I was just trying to help our nation! Maybe I will even purchase a red white and blue hat to show my love for good old America! People will call me the girl who helped out the economy.
After I am finished opening all the bills, I feel a little guilty. I did blow a lot of cash. But I am about to make tons of money working for this new magazine! Maybe I will become best friends with Kim Kardashian and we will go shopping and she will lend me money, because I am her best friend, duh.
“Ethan, you of all people should know that you need to invest money to make money.”
“Really? Cause Sophie I don’t think buying clothes and shoes is considered an investment.”
“I really needed to buy a new outfit for my interview tomorrow! You don’t have the slightest idea how upset I am at you right now”
“Do you realize how many clothes you already have?” He asks.

I am SO done talking to him right now. I pick up my brand new Prada bag and walk toward the door. The last sound that he heard will be the sound of my red bottom shoes clacking against the hardwood floor.
______________________