split second

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It all happened in a split second, but to me It couldn’t have seemed longer. it’s interesting what goes through your mind when you die, my first thought was the reason I was driving aggressively at midnight down a dark road. It was supposed to be a great day for me, the day I turned seventeen. I guess that I’m the type of person who is easily set off, I can’t believe even now that a simple argument between my parents could cause so much pain.
”why can’t we just do that for him.” My mom whines to him. “because we don’t have that kind of money, Jane.” My step-dad, mike, says in the definite tone that signals the conversation is over . there they go again talking like I’m not even there. “he needs a new bass and its his birthday.” “when are you going to understand we can’t.” he said slamming his fist down on the table spilling his coffee all over suit, swearing his mouth off as he left the room my mom started to cry.

Putting on my jacket and leaving without even saying a word to her I left, without a plan to where I was going I walked over to my beat-to-crap Taurus. My breath coming out in heavy clouds of vapor on this dark December night, thinking about how crappy this day had been. As I’m driving around in circles, I began recounting the events that cause me to cry and run red lights. The usually crappy school day I always have was amplified by ten when I was awarded my birthday swirlies, and my bass was stolen after band class. All that amounting to the general tipsy relationship between me and my family was probably made me run that caused me to not see the Volvo that blindsided me.

All emotions swept through me at once, pain as my pelvis slowly shattered, numbness after the pain had subsided, sadness thinking of how my younger sisters would miss me, laughter at how petty my former problems seemed, and then everything went black. And now I wait for the white light to slowly creep towards me.





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