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Reeve Fowler

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My day started with a song-- I heard the music even before I thought of the melody. I sang it in my dreams. The sound of it filled me in, as though I was a mere pail taking in water. The water was cool and smooth; it was magnificent inside me. Slowly I closed my eyes, gently filled my thoughts of that single melody, and played it in the piano. Instantly I was filled with such joy, of such hope, and I swore to myself I would do this forever-- to feel, just to feel, to feel was to live.

I wrote the notes in a musical sheet, smiled, and then stood up. There was so much melody inside me, and all they did was fill me up. If I let them go, if I play them in a piano, would I then be empty? I thought they would leave me, and enter the real world where they can be heard, monopolized, idolized. But then I stopped and sat for a moment; what would happen if I keep them on leash, if my selfish soul bottles them up for eternity? I would be whole, wouldn’t I? I would be my own dream.

Right?

Then I realized it was a mistake to do so. They would live inside me, I know, but eventually they will wither away. They will fade, as dreams often do, because I had not let them go. I will be their death, in so many ways. If that happens then I will die, and that’s for certain.

With a world-suffering sigh I put my fingers on the piano. I closed my eyes again because that was how I did it, and then I relaxed. I let everything that hinders me go. I let them go, and I started the music.

Happiness-- it consumed me. It devoured me so entirely as I played the notes, as I felt them so absolutely in my soul. I thought for a moment that I had gone to the in-between world, where everything was both illusion and reality. I said to myself, “Remember this moment, for in time, when you are old and decrepit, this is the only thing you shall hold unto,” and I smiled, because it was true.

The music seemed to have gone on for eternity. I was not aware of time, or anything, really, for that matter. All I knew was that I was in the middle of this bliss, of such realization, that I had to step back and watch everything unfold. I smiled again. And again. And again.

My day started with a song. It had ended with magic.



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