Schlaf

October 13, 2010
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Walking into the thick air automatically overwhelms you with the feeling of suffocation. As you glance around trying to figure out where the air may thin out a little bit, you look down and notice the carpet is a hideous dark green color. The walls around you that surround your being are the darkest shade of red you have ever seen. Just as you turn your head, you notice an assortment of plants. There are dead ones, alive ones, and even more fake ones. You breathe in and the smell of old must and dried up baby powder fill your nose up to its brim. Suddenly; you hear a noise. You’re not sure whether this noise is just in your head, or if it really does exist. Silent sobs fill your head, along with screams and a dulled voice of a man whose accent is way too difficult for you to understand.

Most people upon entering a funeral home have a sudden feeling of death placed upon their shoulders. You feel more emotions once you open those big wooden doors and step foot inside its shadowing walls than you will ever in a life time. I walked inside the room holding my best friends hand, and from the moment my foot stepped through the door, I knew I was going to regret it. It was too early when I went. I remember waking up, getting dressed, and heading out to her car all in one quick blur. The weather outside, was too nice for the occasion. I felt as if God made it sunny, so he could laugh in my face at how I was truly feeling on the inside. He was just being ironic.

Walking inside, I let my cold hand drag along the rough green walls, never even thinking about letting go of Amanda’s hand. I couldn’t have imagined me seeing my Grandmother’s body without having my best friend at my side. The side of my body rubbed against a small table that was covered in what looked like breath mints.
“What would someone coming to see a dead body need breath mints for?” I suddenly thought to myself.
Amanda and I were slowly making our way into the viewing room to see what I have dreaded all day. The thought of my grandmother’s dead body lying in a casket sent chills down my spine.
“She shouldn’t have been on her own that day.” I whispered out loud to Amanda shaking my head. “I knew something was going to happen if I let my sick grandmother go out to the store on her own. Those stairs are way too steep. Anyone could have fallen over or down them. I just can’t believe I lost my grandmother to them.”
We slowly walked into the bare room, glancing over I noticed we must have been early, because the moment we peeked our heads into the room, there was no one inside.
“Where is everyone?”
Amanda quietly asked with a little bit of easily noticed worry in her voice.
I dropped her hand gradually and forced myself over to the casket as quickly as I could get my shaking legs to take me there. I glanced around in the casket and was over struck with the image I saw. There was not one person in that room except for Amanda and I; and the sight of my grandmothers pale body was too much for me to handle. I fainted.
“Get up, get up, get up. I knew this was going to happen. Adrianna open your eyes. We can leave now; look your mom’s coming inside.”
I couldn’t manage to catch a breath. The image of my grandmothers white skin, her eyes almost doll like, and her face done up with make up she never wore made me sick. I was not sure of how to react.
I got up, finally. We started walking quietly out of the room while people I was familiar with were walking into. Suddenly, I started violently shaking. I didn’t know what it was. My body was trembling, I heard Amanda begin to scream. I couldn’t stop. I collapsed. She held me down; pushing my body into the floor. I couldn’t breathe. My throat began to close. She slapped me violently. In a rush I saw my grandmother. Lying in front of me. She was smiling on the outside, sitting in her chair in her fruit stand and I couldn’t believe it. I started falling. Grandmother’s smile grew smaller and smaller until it became one giant blur. I couldn’t see grandma anymore. I reached out as she reached out and then...
Out of nowhere, I awoke.
I looked up and saw my mother smiling softly at me. The soft skin of her hands combing back my dark brown hair, while her blue eyes slowly moved to the worry on my face. I smiled back. Realizing everything I have just seen was just a horrible dream. I glanced up at her, her light brown hair dancing over her face as her bright smile beamed down on my half asleep daze.
“Don’t ever let me fall asleep again.” I began to say as my mother pulled the blanket up to my neck and tightly wrapped me in it before she went off to work.





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