What Hurts The Most

August 18, 2010
"Why does everyone everyone love Jenna Riley so much?" Samantha questioned, tucking her physics book into the clutter of her other textbooks.
"Have you met her?" Rebecca snorted. "She's got the body of a model, the face of an angel, and the personality of Jesus. Shes..."
"Perfect, I know." Samantha stated sourly. Rebecca raised an eyebrow at Samantha. The sound of slamming lockers surrounded them.
"Jealous?" Rebecca asked. Samantha pulled another textbook from her locker and slammed it to reveal Rebecca's amused face.
"Not even, Rebecca." Samantha spat. Samantha picked her bag off the floor and shoved by Rebecca. Rebecca smiled and grabbed her own bag before following Samantha into their next class.
***
Jenna Riley always sat in the front. Jenna Riley always sat in the front and always sat next to a boy. Jenna Riley always sat in the front and always sat next to a boy and girls would pass her notes all class just to be simply acknowledged by her. Jenna was too nice to turn down the teachers request to sit in the front, or too nice to deny a boy the privilege of sitting next to her for a class, or to return a note to a anxious girl without a cute little reply. She was the kind of girl who raised her hand even when she wasn't sure she knew the answer, just so the teachers face would light up when the teacher saw her participating, or the kind of girl who would start conversation even with the nerdiest guy just because she knew it would make his day, or the kind of girl who would end all her notes with "xoxo" because she knew the girl would show the note to all her friends. Jenna Riley was the "It" girl, and you either wanted to be Jenna Riley, or you wanted to date her. There really was no other third option, unless you were Samantha.
"Samantha, would you please pay attention?" Mrs. Pheebs demanded.
"Uh, yes ma'am." Samantha replied sheepishly. Her face turned a light crimson.
"Sam, if you could stop burning holes into the back of Jenna's head for two seconds, Mrs. Pheebs wouldn't have to address you." Rebecca whispered. Samantha shot a dirty glance at Rebecca.
"I'm not even looking at Jenna, I'm looking out the window. And its Samantha, not Sam." Samantha whispered back.
"GIRLS!" Mrs. Pheebs said, raising her voice.
"Sorry." They both said in unison, shrinking into their seats.
"Maybe you girls should learn to take after your classmate Jenna." Mrs. Pheebs stated proudly, as if she was showing off a trophy.
"Yeah, over my dead body. Gosh I hate that girl." Samantha whispered loudly to Rebecca.
Suddenly, Jenna turned around in her seat and met Samantha's eyes. She heard Samantha.
***
*diiiiiiiiiing*
The bell signaled the end of class, and Samantha couldn't wait to leave. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Rebecca run to the door. She looked up in confusion, and that's when she saw Jenna approaching her.
"Oh no, this cant be happening." Samantha said under her breath.
"I'm sorry?" Jenna asked, now standing directly in her path to the door.
"Nothing, It's nothing. Now can you please move so that I can leave?" Samantha asked politely.
"Well, actually, I just wanted to ask you about something." Jenna replied, bouncing on her heels slightly.
"Oh, well go ahead I guess." Samantha said. "Please be about the homework assignment, please!" Samantha thought to herself.
"When Mrs. Pheebs said you should be more like me, I heard what you said, about you hating me and stuff. I was just wondering why." Jenna asked crossing her arms self consciously.
"The truth?" Samantha asked calmly.
"Yeah, the truth would be nice." Jenna stated quietly.
"You parade around school like your better then everyone else. You use words like "hun, sweety, darling". You're nice to everyone and pretend like you don't see their flaws when you really do. I just don't understand why everyone likes you so much, I mean, you're nothing special." Samantha expressed. Jenna darted her eyes to the floor.
"I never knew you felt this way about me. Why didn't you tell me before?" Jenna questioned.
"How easy do you think it is to go up to a girl you don't know and just tell her you hate her?" Samantha demanded. Jenna flinched at the word hate. Maybe she wasn't as perfect as the act she put on.
"I understand. I'll let you be on your way now. Have a good day Samantha." Jenna retorted. Samantha nearly exploded.
"See, this is what i'm talking about! This is such an act it's pathetic. I know you really want to say something mean to me, so just go ahead and say it. Stop being so d*** polite and just say something to me, d****t! Gosh sometimes I wish you just would disappear" Samantha ordered. Jenna flinched again.
"I'm sorry you feel that way. Good bye Samantha." Jenna stated before she rushed to the door and left Samantha in the classroom alone, feeling like complete dirt.
***
"Oh my gosh! This can't be happening!"
"Did you hear yet?"
"This school will never be the same."
A cascade of comments swirled throughout the hallway like a gust of wind. Samantha stood at her locker, pretending to search for something among the clutter, but she was really eavesdropping on the conversations around her. She had been listening to her classmates for a solid 2 minutes, and yet she hadn't figured out what the fuss was about. Then people started to whisper, and then people started to stare at her. She could feel them burning holes in her back. She slammed her locker and whipped around to face the crowd with an angry expression on her face. Instantly everyone quieted down to silence, but all the eyes were still on her. She just kept staring at all of them, and then finally someone spoke up.
"I hope your happy, b***." a guys voice shouted from the back of the crowd.
"Okay, what is everyone's issue?" Samantha yelled, and suddenly as if god parted the crowd, a clear pathway to the girls restroom was right in front of her. She looked at both sides of the parted crowd. Some people were crying, others giving her some pretty nasty glares, others just looked sad. What was going on?
Samantha walked towards the door, and when she approached it, she grasped the handle and turned it. When the door opened, gasps erupted from behind her. Hanging from the ceiling was the high schools newest ceiling decoration, Jenna Riley. Samantha gasped as she took in what she saw in front of her. She blinked and the stumbled backwards into the crowd. She felt people push and shove her. Tears erupted from her eyes and she turned around and fought her way through the crowd. When she reached the back, she bolted down the hallway and out of site.
"Hey, whats going on?" Rebecca asked as she approached the crowd, coming from the opposite direction. A girl in the back with bushy hair and acne turned around to face rebecca.
"Jenna Riley killed herself!" She shouted with a lisp, and rebecca's jaw dropped. Rebecca shoved her way into the crowd and fought her way to the front. When she saw what everyone was staring at, her skin turned a deathly pale. Jenna Riley hung from a noose in the dead center of the girls bathroom. Her arms were decorated with scars from past cutting, and a fresh new one on on her neck. But that wasnt what everyone was staring at. It wasnt the empty prescription bottles on the floor. It wasnt the bloody razors lined up along the sink. And it wasnt the fact that Jenna Riley had stripped down to her bra and underwear. Everyone was starring at her bare stomach, which flashed the phrase "You got your wish Samantha." written in blood.





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