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"At any moment life could suddenly change."
Alice wrote before closing her diary and placing it between the two boards of her bed in her hidden place.
"Hmm.. " I sighed and sat back down on the ground beside her bedroom window. I had been watching her for the past week and I still couldn't understand what was making her so depressed to stay in her room all week. I admired my sister, I always had, she was like a role model for me and I could always go to her for help we talked and told each other secrets, but now most days the most I got out of her was, "Hi," or a occasional "shut the door." I thought about her last line she had just wrote and wished I could have read more, what if life was changing right before our eyes and me and Alice would never have that relationship again? Me being 14, just entered High School had no idea about the real world out there, it made me sick inside just to think of everything my sisters probably going through. Mom and Dad were worried at first, then came all the fights late at night, and then my sister gradually started to get sick, now day and night she lives in her room barely doing anything and yells at me constantly to stay out. Mom and Dad said give her time... but time could be forever and forever might be too late. Nick, my sisters ex-boyfriend stopped by the other day to drop off her stuff after their recent breakup and since then my sisters been pretty upset, she sobs day and night over it- but I'll always remember the day she had just came home after the incident, it was awful.
"Ahh!" my sister yelled through the house as she slammed the front door and broke down into sobs.
"Whats wrong?" I asked worried running over to her as she sprawled across the living room screaming/crying.
"Nick broke up with me!!! What else could be wrong?" She looked up at me for a brief moment then turned back to her sobbing.
"What, what happened?"
Nick and Alice had been together for 8 months and not once had they gotten into a fight, things had been moving smoothly and I even remember my sister telling me, "things were starting to get serious." I told her to watch out because she could end up the next 16 and pregnant kid, but she always gave me a smile and reassured me things would be fine.
"Stuff. Tell mom and dad I'll be in my room for the rest of my life."
"Alice wait," I said grabbing her hand. "What about school and cheerleading you can't shut down your whole life"
"Sure I can, and I just did- screw it, those don't matter anymore."
"Could you just try talking to me?" I asked trying to come her down.
"There's nothing to talk about, now just leave me alone!" She yelled and ran up to her room, making me flinch as she slammed the door behind her. I sat on the floor devastated and sighed , thinking what could have possibly happened to make her that upset. Alice was always strong she never let anyone screw with her and she rarely cried, but when she did she sure did make it noticeable, it killed me inside to hear her upstairs throwing everything around between the screams and sobs.
Now its been almost a whole week and things have slowly started to settle down. She wrote in that diary everyday now and it took everything inside of me from losing my patience and going in to steal it out of there. I decided to try to go in there and start a conversation. I creaked open the door and peaked into my sisters stuffy little room.
"What are you doing in here?" She glared at me.
"Alice, I've been worried, whats going on with you? You look really ill and pale.."
"Nobody cares, so just leave okay?"
"But...Alice, I care, I really do, I can't stand seeing you like this." She looked like she was about to cry then her face turned serious again.
"You wouldn't understand, you're too young"
"Sure I would, what ever happened to the sisterly bond?" I asked and pointed to our bracelet.
"That ended when I finally grew up, I'm sorry you're on your own now." I could feel the tears starting to stream down my cheeks,
"I don't know you anymore," I said and walked out of the room and into mine, where I ended up crying myself to sleep.
School was hard the next day, my friend Sam asked me what was wrong and I just shrugged and ignored everyone for the entire day. The whole ride home I thought of all the possibilities that could be wrong with my sister, but none of them seemed possible, she was the good girl in the family and Nick came along and screwed it all up. My hands clenched into fists at that thought, I had always had a weird feeling about him but I could never make out what it was. He must have made my sister this way, she was completely and utterly in love with him and he threw it all away. What a jerk. I calmed down and walked into the house for another long boring night. I ran upstairs to use the bathroom, but stopped dead in my tracks, something about this picture wasn't right. My sisters bedroom door was wide open - not once had it been open unless mom and dad were in there, but they weren't even home, so what was up? I top toed down the hallway and flashed a quick glance into Alice's room and I gave a confused look as I turned away and then looked back again focusing in, her bed was empty. I walked in and looked around having no luck in spotting her anywhere. I decided to call her name, but knew she would kill me the instant she saw I was in her room.
"Alice, Alice are you there?" I shouted throughout the house. I heard a crash from down in the basement and sprinted downstairs. I searched for where the noise had came from. There lying on the floor was my sister, unconscious with the fridge door wide open above her with a beer in her hand.
"Oh no!" I shouted and ran over to her. "Alice, Alice wake up!" I shouted as I started shaking her frantically. I glanced around the floor and must have seen over a dozen empty bottles scattered and broke all over the place. I started to cry, and still hadn't received her response yet, she just lied there, unspoken.
I ran back upstairs to peer at the note mom and dad had left on the fridge, it read they wouldn't be home until 7:30 so I had plenty of time. I ran back down to my drunk sister and managed to carry her back up the stairs, but the moment we made it to the top the puking began.
"Urghh." I moaned with a disgust, who would wanna drink to this point?
"What the hell is going on?" my sister yelled between her short breathes.
"I would ask you the same, but I'm to busy trying to keep you alive" I snapped.
"You shouldn't be here because I'm fine." She disentangled her arms from mine and strangled up the stairs only to fall once again and the puking came back.
"Fine, eh?" I chuckled. "Wait till mom and dad hear about this."
She collapsed and started randomly singing and shouting, walking crookedly up the stairs. Drunk, boy I was ashamed, I never thought it would come down to this, I thought as I stared picking up all the empty bottles off the floor. Once I finished I ran upstairs to see my sister passed out on the bathroom floor. I figured she would pass through it and recover on later with a hangover. I couldn't help but go to her room again. Inside it was the same as I had always remembered it, I checked behind me to make sure my sister wasn't somewhere crawling behind me and ran over to her bed. This is the moment I had been waiting for- the diary. I lifted the mattress up from between the box spring and there it sat the little helpless book all alone, containing so many untold secrets, just awaiting before me. I was so happy I almost squealed and jumped from excitement but I had to keep it down, in case any moment my sister woke up. I picked up the purple book with the blue lacing along the edges and stopped before I opened it. What if I had found out Alice went through my diary I would flip c***, but this was different I convinced myself she was in desperate need for some help and it was soo hard to resist! I forgot about it and flipped the cover open the first entry was from only two weeks ago on April 7th. I flipped through the pages till I found one that read from earlier today,
"Mom and dad are out for the day today, and I am going down to the liquor cabinet, I don't give a s*** anymore, I'm going to drink till I can drink no more. I just tried one and it tastes soo disgusting but I'll just chug the rest of them till I can't taste it no more..."
Another one read,
" I gave up on Nick today, he broke up with me the second I told him I was pregnant with his baby, now what the hell am I supposed to do? Abortion? Nah, but I can't tell my sister Casey she will tell mom and dad for sure and they'll kill me!!! Life sucks, I hate it here..."
I shut the diary and didn't read anymore from that point on that was enough, wow could it really be true? And she just consumed all that alcohol, oh no ... mmmm.. I can't tell anyone so how am I supposed to help her? I placed the diary back down in its place and sat on her bed and thought till I could think no more.