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Silly Apprehension

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With every minute that passes, my heart beats faster. Who is the “smart one” that invented the clock? Couldn’t we just go on with our lives and not have to worry about checking the time? A life without caring if we’re late for an important date. A place where we don’t need to figure out if it truly is a “hair past a freckle” or just something clever to say. Life without clocks, without the annoying ticking, a life that’s just there. Still. Idle. Frozen . . . Okay, agreed, that sounds really boring.

How about this: time stopping watches! It’s the thing of the future! No more being late for anything, no more having to rush. Just hit the handy-dandy “TIME STOP” button on your watch and viola! Oh, if I could just get my hands on one of those, then my troubles would be over. Alright, now, how can I buy a time stopping watch? Ebay? Oh, darn. Are they even invented? Grr. Okay. That’s okay. You’ll be okay. Just breath in . . . It’s fine. I’ll just have to find a different solution.

Think. Different solution. Different solution. Different sol—I know! I could rent a time machine and go backwards, before I made the decision for Friday! Or I could just skip ahead in my life and not worry about it! There you go! I knew there had to be a way out! Life’s lookin’ sweeter already!

Oh. My brother just broke it to me gently that time machines haven't been invented either. What’s up with that?! Are all you inventors just sitting around, sipping a coke, and watching “How It’s Made”? This is really irresponsible of you! You have no idea!

I look at my list of solutions. Scribbled in horribly messy writing across a piece of scratch paper are the words: “no time”, “STOP watch”, and “time machine”. Each word has an annoyance-slash scratched across it.

I need to think. There has to be a way out of my going on Friday. There HAS to be! I scan my brain over and over. Headache increasing. Thud! My ears tell me that something just fell on the floor but I ignore them. I’m still thinking. STILL THINKING!! Grr. Ugh. I can’t take it anymore. Before my brain begins to purge all of my childhood memories, I reach down and pick up what fell. It’s a book. Holding my pounding head, I flip through a couple pages. Something catches my eye. I stop flipping. There’s a phrase in the book that reads, “So don't worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today's trouble is enough for today”. Sighing, I give up. Fine. I’m not going to worry about tomorrow, or Friday, or whatever.

Holy cow! What if . . . nope, not worrying. I’m not worrying at all. I’m calm, cool, and collected – like a cucumber. Think: cucumber. Block out Friday’s thoughts. Think: cucumber. Think. Think. Hey, it’s actually working! I don’t even remember what I was getting all worked up about. Ha-ha! Well, I’m boring myself. Or you’re boring me. I don’t remember. Anyhow, I’m bored. And for some reason, I have the sudden urge to watch Veggie Tales. Good-bye! Thinking: cucumber. Thinking cucumber. Thinking cucum—Doh. I just thought about Friday.





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