The Raw Ramblings Of A Youth On A Bad Day

June 23, 2010
By Ellawind PLATINUM, Seattle, Washington
Ellawind PLATINUM, Seattle, Washington
40 articles 0 photos 77 comments

Favorite Quote:
What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger.

Don't let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game.

Dream like you will live forever, live like you will die today.


I'm so sick and tired of everything right now. Of work, of school, of cliques, of not knowing what to say, of being stressed... good god, I'm just sick of everything. I'm sick of not understanding, not knowing. Tired of overanalyzing every little event in my life. I'm finished with now- I need to move forward! It's like being caught in traffic for hours, with no foreseeable relief.

This is just one of those days, isn't it? Fortunately I can skate tonight... I need to skate. To be free.

I need a dictionary. I have an urge to consume the words, an urge that demands satisfaction. Why doesn't anybody get it? Her face when she saw me... like I was doing something wrong, something stupid, like it was a plea for attention.

That's not right! I shouldn't feel self-conscious about anything I decide to read, whether it's a dictionary or something else! But I am, because of the ones who scorn me.

I know I shouldn't give a damn. The thing is, I can't help it. I'm different- yeah, we get it. Everybody knows. So why do they judge? I don't look at them and laugh at their use of the word (if it can be labeled as such) 'hella,' nor do I raise an eyebrow when they spend math class doing their makeup. I know that's just what they do. Can't they grasp that what I do is just different, not ridiculous or idiotic?

I just can't get these words out fast enough. My mind is high on confusion right now, high in a strange way that I can't explain.

Is it because of that one absence? Could that really have gotten my heart and mind into such a tangled mess? I suppose it's possible... How can I have let my emotions be so manipulated? I just don't understand it.

Ugh. I don't want to think anymore, to feel. I want it all to dissipate, to erode away, fast-forward.

But would that make my challenge easier, or worsen it?

The author's comments:
Simple- I had a really awful day, for reasons I'm not going to go into. Instead of yelling at a bunch of people or bursting into tears, both of which I considered doing and almost did, I wrote.

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This article has 7 comments.


on May. 8 2011 at 8:15 pm
Claire_Milan PLATINUM, Waldorf, Maryland
29 articles 1 photo 21 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Love that we cannot have is the one that lasts the longest, hurts the deepest, and feels the strongest because True Love cannot be found where it truly doesn't exist nor can it be hidden where it truly does."---A wise young man

This is very encouraging to me because I can totally relate to it. Great job!! =D

on Sep. 5 2010 at 10:20 am
Ellawind PLATINUM, Seattle, Washington
40 articles 0 photos 77 comments

Favorite Quote:
What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger.

Don't let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game.

Dream like you will live forever, live like you will die today.

Thanks, that means a lot to me. : I did check out your work, but I left feedback there, so I won't repeat myself here. Great job, though!

on Sep. 4 2010 at 9:26 pm
NeverCaredForKool-Aid GOLD, Elkridge, Maryland
13 articles 0 photos 531 comments

Favorite Quote:
I don't believe in hell but I believe in my parent's couch-- Watsky

Liked it a lot :)  The ending was preyyy legit.  I think it's so cool that you had the guts to write this down, and then post it on top of that!  I sometimes feel the need to write things like this, but I've never been one bold enough to write my emotions down.  It makes then =m feel too definate too me, to permanent.  I like to deny them, which is sorta sad, but true.

Anywya, really great little story, five stars :)

Again, I thought this was really amazing, can you comment and rate my story, "Encounter"?  You're so good I just want to see what you might think of my stuff... :)


on Aug. 5 2010 at 3:23 pm
Lover_that_Hates DIAMOND, Reynolds, Georgia
76 articles 0 photos 118 comments

Favorite Quote:
"She was fascinated with words. To her words were things of beauty, each like a magical powder or potion that could be combinded with other words to create powerful spells." From: Lighting(By: Dean Koontz)

very good! i like it alot! There is really nothing better than a good raw rant and that just what you did here; very nice!

on Jul. 11 2010 at 6:14 pm
OfficialApprover PLATINUM, Orefield, Pennsylvania
48 articles 0 photos 1754 comments

Favorite Quote:
Grab life by the balls. -Slobberknocker
We cannot change the cards we're dealt just how we play the hand
Experience is what you get when you didn't get what you wanted
It's pretty easy to be smart when you're parroting smart people
-Randy Pausch

Thanks!:) 

on Jul. 11 2010 at 6:05 pm
Ellawind PLATINUM, Seattle, Washington
40 articles 0 photos 77 comments

Favorite Quote:
What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger.

Don't let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game.

Dream like you will live forever, live like you will die today.

Thanks, knowing that it was relatable helps a lot, as that's one of the things I'm working n improving. I did check out your stuff, it's great! Keep writing!

on Jul. 9 2010 at 6:55 am
OfficialApprover PLATINUM, Orefield, Pennsylvania
48 articles 0 photos 1754 comments

Favorite Quote:
Grab life by the balls. -Slobberknocker
We cannot change the cards we're dealt just how we play the hand
Experience is what you get when you didn't get what you wanted
It's pretty easy to be smart when you're parroting smart people
-Randy Pausch

I loved this!  It was, as you said in the title, very raw  but emotional and well-written, very relatable. Great job.   Keep writing!

Btw, will you check out and comment on my work?





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