I feel so, so guilty. But I don't know why. Was it because I turned my back on him? I dig my face into my arms, the soft tears rolling down my cheeks. No, I didn't turn my back on him. Did I? I don't know anymore. What's right from wrong, from what's good to bad? I just wanted him to love me;was that so bad? Is it so bad to want to be loved? Gentle sobs shake my system. I couldn't take the pain, the misery of knowing that he loved someone else. I didn't have a choice. Did I? I hug my kness, trembling. I wish I knew what to do. But for now, I'm alone.