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Boredom

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I sat in my room, a square room with a panhandle. Big, but not too big, gray but not too gray, a color scheme gone wrong. What happened to the colors I wanted? Where is my emo rainbow?
Boredom, what is it? I don’t know the definition, and I’m not about to go look online. The guilt would only pile. Wasting time and wasting electricity and money doesn’t have to go hand in hand.
Bored, it’s 6:22 pm. Why didn’t I do anything today? I called my friend at three, asked her to come over; I pleaded her to help stop my boredom. She said she would think about it. She never called back. I didn’t call her, she might just show up, or she’ll go hang out with our friends, but she won’t call me though. She won’t call me because I’m boring. I might laugh when they tell me their stories of the day, and they will forget that I called. I’ll feel rejected and I’ll feel unwanted. But that’s temporary, and I won’t give a damn later on. It’s called forgive and forget. Or is it? I don’t know and I don’t care.
I turn on the TV, nothing. There’s something, it’s just not interesting. I turn the TV off after a quick channel surf. The cablevision box has a bright digital clock. I always use it to check the time. I like it; it doesn’t tick-tock like my other time-telling device. The other one just reminds me that time passes by quick.
It is 6:53 now, still bored. I lie on my bed and try to sleep. I shut my eyes and try to sleep. I get into my bedcovers and try to sleep. I shoot my eyes open and grunt. I pretend like it’s a new day. It’s early, that’s why it’s so dark.
I walk over to my window. Strange, it’s raining. The pitter-patter of the raindrop soldiers is irritating. Why did it rain over Spring Break? What day is it anyway? Maybe it’s Tuesday, and I’ll get to see Ryan Seacrest on American Idol tonight. I should really check a calendar or my computer. But, why waste energy? Everything electric in this city is powered by coal. Cheap coal too, cheap coal burns the dirtiest. Yuck really. It’s called air pollution and lung cancer.
Twitter, Facebook, Myspace, why did I get them anyway? Fads are overrated. Twitter is for stalking, so that one is okay. Facebook on the other hand is boring. People go on to tell people where they are and what they’re doing and how they feel, nothing funny. I mean, twitter is the same but with celebrities. Facebook is the place where my mom puts stuff on my wall and my baby pictures. I mean I was a cute kid, but mom had to be banned, blocked, whatever. And Myspace is just lame. No one important uses it anymore.
On Twitter, I found Obama. I thought he was supposed to be taking care of the country not twittering. I don’t know what he tweets because I don’t follow, but man, it’s just like all these celebrities meeting him. Just plain silly.
7:25, did I really spend that long thinking? Weird, and I’m still bored. If it’s Tuesday, then in thirty minutes I should turn the TV on to Fox to see if Idol is gonna be on. That might relief my boredom, unless the contestants suck. Then that’ll be a problem.
Why even watch Idol? If I don’t watch and try to entertain myself with nature’s gifts, then I would stop my air pollution, kind of. Why did I take AP Environmental? Now I feel bad. Why can’t America change? Maybe if it was more like Denmark. Now that would be great. And why is the US the only western country that hasn’t signed the Kyoto Protocol? I thought Obama cared about the environment. Was the environment and going Green on his platform? I don’t even know. I don’t like politics. It’s all a dirty game, and I don’t like dirty games.
Oh, it is 8:03, time to turn to Fox. And it’s not Tuesday, it’s Monday. Who cares now? Turn the TV off and dance in the dark, sounds better. Now, I have to find my iPod and plug in the iHome.
I plug both in, turn the lights off, put shuffle and Poker Face comes on. Sexy dance when no one is looking. That’s what I did, but my sexy dancing is pretty bad, so I’m sure it looks more awkward than what I think. I try to move with the music and copy Lady GaGa’s sexy dance moves, but many would just say FAIL.
A couple of songs went by. I stopped at 9:02. For some reason, I actually sweat. Good work out; though I’m sure dancing like a moron is far from a good work out.
The sky was clear when I looked out the window. The rain soldiers had stopped their invasion. It was still wet, I could tell, but I decided to go on my roof-porch anyway. The summer air felt great, it wasn’t humid, and it felt free instead of stuffy.
I had brought a pillow and a blanket out. I sat on the roof-porch and I saw the small city where I lived. Where thousands of diverse people lived, those like me and those who were different in every way. I sat thinking about them and about their lives. How they exist and I don’t know them, and how they don’t know me and I exist. It’s strange how small we are. There are 6.9 billion, or so, people on Earth. We don’t contribute to any ecosystem; we destroy them and only care for ourselves. It might be easy to say “There should be less people! Cut the population of people in half!” But, who would those people be? The people who reproduce the most are the ones in third world countries. The One Child Policy works, but it is inhumane. Give people condoms, and the Catholic Church will yell nay.
I always think too much. My thoughts come out of Boredom. I lied down on the roof and looked at the stars. The giant dark blue of a world so beautiful, it’s amazing how vast the sky is, and how big the universe is. I felt the sky would swallow me in, I felt it would come down and I would disappear, and then what? Who would remember me? No one, people naturally have short attention spans.
I shouldn’t just sit and let life pass me by. I don’t want to feel bored, but boredom brings something out of me. I think and I think. I don’t want to be forgotten. Maybe next time I should make friends with people who don’t forget. Maybe I should stop being the contestant on American Idol who takes no risks and gets kicked off early and isn’t remembered. Next time won’t be next time, and I’ll try and turn my next time into today. Sounds cheesy, but I mean, hey, what can I say but the truth.



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This article has 2 comments. Post your own!

KillerButterfly said...
May 10, 2010 at 12:24 pm:
This was really good. Deep.
 
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xxSilvia4realzzxx said...
Apr. 14, 2010 at 3:39 pm:
YO!!! WAZZ GOOD SON!! this is silvia u member i member i dnt wanna rite 2 u on facebook cuz ur a loser so yeah tht just sounded like a diary... so FAKE!!!!! BE MORE CREATIVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! w/ no love u noe im not trying to be mean im being truthful like simon from american idol!                                  -♥Silvia♥
 
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