Mel's Story, Part II | Teen Ink

Mel's Story, Part II

February 24, 2010
By Bassoonkelley GOLD, Tampa, Florida
Bassoonkelley GOLD, Tampa, Florida
15 articles 0 photos 49 comments

It's been two months since the talk, and I'm still pathetically hopeful.
I mean, hey - everyone says a woman is always a mother, a man is a father once he sees his child. Maybe...maybe he just needs to see her.

I took a deep breath for both of us.
The whole school knew by now, and all of my friends were still deciding. Still deciding if they should stay, or run, or just drop off a gift at my baby shower and then pretend like they don't know me the next day. It's a very subtle thing they're doing; trying to be supportive but also slowly giving me more 'space' until they finally stop visiting altogether.
I don't blame them, I wouldn't want to associate with me either.
I'd been taking a walk through the city's park, which is always empty on a Thursday. I stopped to take a rest at one of the benches closest to the water, holding my little girl from the outside of my belly.
I closed my eyes and just let my mind float between my thoughts, slipping around the corners of my ideas, weaving in and out of them.

Ezra. Ezra...something.

I've always adored that name. In Hebrew it means "help", and I always thought that was so fitting for a newborn - especially an unexpected one. Most new parents are so freaked out by the time that their kid is almost ready to be born that they are just about to kill each other. When their baby arrives, it soothes them into the nurturing mothers and fathers they need to be. The baby helps their relationship.
In my case, however, Ezra's going to be a different kind of help.
God willing, she's going to keep me sane.
Hugging my belly, I got comfortable and started to tell my Ezra a story.

"Once there was a sailor whose lover was The Sea. As soon as he was old enough to work on a boat, he got a job as a laborer. He soon became the captain of his very own ship, which he happily sailed all around the world until he was an old man. Every night he would go to his cabin below the deck and let the beautiful songs of The Sea lull him to sleep, his lover only separated from him by just a few inches of wood and metal. As an old man, one night the sailor became completely despondent. Do you know what that means, baby girl? That means he was so heartsick he couldn't fight any longer. He sat on the deck of his glorious ship, drinking bottle after bottle of wine, toasting to the health of his lover The Sea. Out of his mind with both heartache and liquor, the sailor tied a cannonball around his ankle, and climbed over the railing of his ship. Declaring his love for The Sea, he begged her to let him love her. He explained that he'd never wanted one being so much in his life. Never felt so connected; so connected that the mere inches of distance between them was so painful he couldn't bare it."

Taking a few moments to push the tears back down my throat, I continued.
"The Sea, feeling his pain and realizing her own feelings for him, sent a giant wave towards the sailor's ship, sending the man right into her loving embrace. To this day, if you listen closely enough, you can hear his drunken laughter in the crash of every wave."


The author's comments:
the next section of "Mel's Story." I'm still working on a title. Anything you'd like to see in the novel? Any suggestions? :)

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This article has 10 comments.


KatsK DIAMOND said...
on Feb. 21 2012 at 7:22 pm
KatsK DIAMOND, Saint Paul, Minnesota
57 articles 0 photos 303 comments

Favorite Quote:
Being inexhaustible, life and nature are a constant stimulus for a creative mind.
~Hans Hofmann
You must stay drunk on writing so reality cannot destroy you.
~Ray Bradbury

Good job! This kinda reminds me of Annie Lammott's (sp?) memoir about raising her child after the dad ran away. Maybe a good title would be Finding Her Way or something . . .. .

on Feb. 5 2011 at 9:37 pm
awesomeaugust GOLD, Boston, Massachusetts
10 articles 0 photos 176 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Keep your eyes on the stars and your feet on the ground"
~Theordore Roosevelt

I love it! (again) I lvoe how it sounds like a real novel...and it flows well from the first installment. Only suggestion is- don't rush into the title. I think Ezra might be a little too obvious for this story...you need something really original...jsut my opinion!

on Jul. 28 2010 at 6:42 pm
PoetLaureate07 PLATINUM, Aberdeen, Mississippi
32 articles 0 photos 246 comments

Favorite Quote:
To love is to risk not being loved in return. To hope is to risk pain. To try is to risk failure, but the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing..

this is really beautiful... i love the story of the sea and her lover.... sounds familiar.... beautiful.... suggestion............................................................................ let "Craig" come back into the picture or tell how "Mel" lives raisin her baby by herself n finds a man thtll take care of her baby...

on Jul. 2 2010 at 7:22 am
I love this story. As for title suggestions, I thought Ezra might be a good one. Maybe it's a little cliche but I think it'll work, if that's what you choose. I'd like to see how Mel will find help to support her child.

on Jun. 25 2010 at 11:16 am
roxymutt BRONZE, Marietta, Georgia
4 articles 5 photos 110 comments

Favorite Quote:
It's not what you look at that matters, it's what you see. -David Henry Thoreau

this is great! i liked this a lot...there were such great emotions and the story just pulled the entire piece togeter for some reason! i really liked this :D

on Apr. 9 2010 at 8:41 pm
madmadie22 BRONZE, Wichita, Kansas
2 articles 0 photos 28 comments

Favorite Quote:
"It is quite unnerving to be proven wrong, particularly when you are really right and the person proving you wrong is proving himself wrongly right. Right?" Lemony Snicket, The Reptile Room

Oh-ma-goodness! This is so beautiful!  The story about the man and The Sea and just how she is dealing with the baby is so... I don't know, it's beautiful!  I can't wait for the next one!

Emiline SILVER said...
on Apr. 5 2010 at 4:49 pm
Emiline SILVER, Nashville, Tennessee
9 articles 0 photos 33 comments

Favorite Quote:
"When deep injury is done to us, we will never recover until we forgive. Forgiveness cannot change the past. But it does enlarge the future."- Mary Karen Read

I can't wait for more! Please keep posting!!

on Apr. 4 2010 at 12:00 am
live.laugh.spaz GOLD, Singapore, Singapore, Other
11 articles 11 photos 32 comments

Favorite Quote:
laughter is a tranquilizer with no side effects

OMG i love this.....post more pleeasseee (: 

on Mar. 9 2010 at 3:30 pm
Tori.Lovett GOLD, Alexandria, Louisiana
17 articles 3 photos 35 comments

Favorite Quote:
Fill your paper with the breathings of your heart. ~William Wordsworth
--------
The wastebasket is a writer's best friend. ~Isaac Bashevis Singer

I love it! LOVE IT! I can't wait for more! Ah!

I loved the entire thing. You are so talented! I love all of your work! The story within the story was beautiful. Amazing job!

on Mar. 9 2010 at 8:19 am
babigerl1194 PLATINUM, Margaretville, New York
23 articles 10 photos 155 comments

Favorite Quote:
wat doesnt kill you only makes you stronger

omg i loved it. you are so talented. my favorite part was the story the mommy told her baby. it was heart wrenching and yet so beautiful.


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