Mel's Story, Part I

February 2, 2010
Quietly, he spoke.

"Well then I can't see you any more."

I searched his face quizzically, trying to figure out where exactly this was coming from. Definitely not his backbone, that's for sure.

"Then open your eyes, Craig! This - this isn't something you can just run away from! I can't run, and you're tied to me. Life isn't a three-legged race, Craig. We have to take this slow, together, okay? Step by step. Together."

"I can't, Mel. I just...I just can't."

I pressed a hand against my stomach. Apparently it was as sick of his bull as I was.

"I didn't do this to myself! WE did this! We made this...this..."
I couldn't believe the word he'd chosen to finish my sentence.

"To be honest I was going to say 'baby', but apparently I was way off base. It's too late for the alternative, Craig. WE HAVE NO OPTIONS. We're just going to have to roll with the Goddam punches."

The look he gave me said everything. He was always the kind of person who would just get frustrated when he couldn't move his emotions from his heart to his mouth, which is where I came into play. I felt incredibly calm, which so surprised me; I was picturing a complete meltdown.
"I know that you don't love me; not anymore, at least. To be honest, Craig, I'm not in love with you either. Your fingernails are way too long, and you only wash your hair like twice a week. Not exactly attractive."
I sighed a defeated sigh. Maybe this kid is going to be a superhero, because I have no idea where my strength is coming from.
"I don't have the money, or the time, and neither do you. But combined, maybe...maybe we can be our own little dysfunctional family."

He was pacing back and forth, slowly and deliberately. I stepped in front of him, staring him in the face.
"Craig, maybe we can do this."
Pressing both of his hands to his forehead, Craig slowly shook his head.

"Well. I'm not gonna lie, that's disappointing."

Together we just stood there for a second, kicking at the ground and staring off into the distance past the lake's shore. Words just kept coming out of my mouth, even though I knew I should probably keep to silence.

"You know, in third world countries like Cambodia or Somalia or whatever they used to have these things called "menstrual huts". When women were on their periods they would be exiled to just sit in these huts, because men in like the 1400's thought that the shedding of uteral lining was witchcraft voodoo or Santeria or something. Except they didn't actually CALL them "menstrual huts" at the time seeing as how they thought it was some form of really icky, evil magic."

Probbbbably not the best conversational topic.

Taking an embarrassed second to clear my throat, I decided to wrap things up.
"Wellllpp, you've got about what?, five or six months to find your balls? So, if those two little bundles of fertile joy show up and you decide to do something halfway valiant by being a father to your own child, why don't you shoot me a text or facebook me or something. I'm probably not going to want to talk to you or see you, so impersonal communication is most likely the best route to take. But hey, what do you know about the best route, right? Have a good life, a**hole."

I had a feeling that things would turn out this way.
Take a little advice from me and listen to your gut.
Mine used to be full of good judgment, but now it's probably got something in it that looks like a newborn panda surrounded by placenta goo.

Join the Discussion

This article has 13 comments. Post your own now!

Blah_blah_blah said...
Aug. 6, 2011 at 11:34 am
I love this!! I know im a little late but I read your article The Color of the Inside of my Mouth and it led me here.  I can't get enough of your stories!
awesomeaugust This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Feb. 5, 2011 at 9:20 pm

I love this! Perfect beginning, a real grabber, great dialogue, thought the use of swearing was appropriate (and that's coming from someone who doesn't swear), and great ending! This would be a wonderful short story but also a great ending to the first chapter of a novel. I love the umph behind mel's words. I'm not a total feminist or anything, but I was like "yeah!"

Love love love it. Thanks,


maggiebar1 said...
Feb. 5, 2011 at 8:13 pm

I'm not sure if my other comment posted or not, and it case it doesnt for some reason, I'll just say it again. Anyways, I really like the beginning and where you're going with the story. The only advice I would give is this: don't make Mel get too descriptive when she's talking directly to someone, in this case, Craig. Example. When she tells Craig to text or Facebook her because she'd prefer impersonal communication. I like the descriptiveness a lot, but it just seems like thats something th... (more »)

maggiebar1 said...
Feb. 5, 2011 at 8:01 pm
also, about the GD word. use with caution, but I think in the event of using it because it helps add to the character, go right ahead. just don't be throwing it down because you can
PoetLaureate07 said...
Jul. 28, 2010 at 6:36 pm
i eally like ur story, but... PLEASE DONT USE THAT GD WORD... it makes me mad and ruins a wonderful story...
Bassoonkelley This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Jul. 29, 2010 at 1:02 am
I'm sorry about that, and I'll keep that in consideration when I'm writing from now on!
PoetLaureate07 replied...
Jul. 29, 2010 at 3:37 pm
Thank you.... It truly was  wonderful story.... Part II i great, too... you really need to write a part 3...
Bassoonkelley This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Jul. 30, 2010 at 2:23 am
Thanks so much :) The comments I get really mean a lot to me.

This and Part II are actual the beginnings of my first novel :) I've  only got about 10 pages so far, but it's a start!
PoetLaureate07 replied...
Jul. 30, 2010 at 2:48 pm
It truly is... im glad u have found some type of inspiration to encourage you to write a novel... dont accept failure as faiure(which i dout youll have)but acceptit as a second chance!!! =)
Megaphone1927 said...
Jun. 25, 2010 at 10:30 pm
Ahhhh, this is written really well! Most stories out there nowadays are super-predictable, but with yours, I have no idea what's happen next!
PoetUnknown said...
May 23, 2010 at 6:30 pm
Wow this is REALLY GOOD! I guess im not the only person inspired reading everyone elses comments:)
babigerl1194 said...
Feb. 24, 2010 at 5:35 pm
this is amazing!! i love it. never do i read long stories but ive read all of yours. i read all yer work and i want more. its like a drug ur that goood. u should totally be writer for not only are u good and make the reader feel emotions but u put thoughts in our heads too and make us thinkk. well to b honest u inspired me and so know imma go write. ur like my hero now.
ToriLovett said...
Feb. 13, 2010 at 1:59 pm
You are an amazing writer! I love it! Can't wait to read more! Keep it coming!
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