As I was sitting in the retreat visiting room my mom told me that this would be the last time she would ever be in there. She promised she would never take a sip of alcohol again. Funny how promises can take a spin so quickly. Within a few months sure enough the promise was broken. The alcohol had caressed her lips once again. The devil had reentered her body; leaving no hope for recovery. I knew then that I could never trust those words again. It was the devil I was dealing with, and he wasn’t about to surrender; not under any circumstances. The pain I felt when I realized I had been cheated, lied to, conceived was like no other. I found no hope in trusting anyone ever again. What’s the point? I thought. I’ll just be let down. Tears shed and bodies shook. Nothing would take the devil away and I know that now. Promises don’t mean anything when the devil is evolved. He streams up into your veins and refuses to leave. He lingers there like the annoying friend that will never leave. What is a promise exactly? It doesn’t mean much to me. A promise is just words. Simply that and no more. There is no reason to believe these words because they are just that, words.
Nothing But Words
January 27, 2010