Lonely | Teen Ink

Lonely

December 3, 2009
By Anonymous

Lonely

The rain poured down from the thick murky clouds above. It seeped through the girl’s sweatshirt and streamed down her back, rippling over each vertebra, sending fresh yet unsettling chills deep into her veins. The icy micro shocks sent flashes of vibrant emotion across her aching mind; emotions of longing and of loneliness. She stepped under the dripping awning of the bus stop bench, with no intention of catching a bus.
The boy ran, pounding the wet pavement. He swiftly avoided a muddy puddle only to slosh through another. He ran not as someone who is free and has left their burdens behind, but rather with a bent back, eyes darting with discomfort. Averting his eyes from those of the passers-by he pretended to run with a purpose. However all too soon the boy’s heart grew too heavy and his glance settled on the partially welcoming bus stop bench. Now he could sit and imagine he was waiting for a bus.
It had been a long day. The girl’s head hung low under the pressure of her sorrows. She could not let the world see this, this weakness. She pulled out her cell phone and stared unblinkingly down at the screen, shuffling through her empty inbox and recent calls list. She looked up only for a moment at the ashen sky. A boy sat down; a boy with a preoccupied face and yet a firm stare. The second he joined her on the bench her soul cried out from within her to know him and to be known by him. She wanted so badly to be able to greet him with a familiar smile. Her loneliness creeped down into her hands causing the muscles to throb with the innocent desire to be held. She needed a friend or better yet and angel on the unforgiving day. Strangers however, are not angles they are busy and pensive. Once again her mind was invaded with the severity of her insecurities and shortcomings. She remained a motionless drone on a bench with her phone, knowing that if she were to speak her voice would only crack and dissolve into the dense discomfiture of the moment. Besides the boy was clearly uninterested in small talk or introductions. He was waiting for a bus. He had places to go and people to see; people whom he loved, people who were easy to talk to. No, she was not interesting enough to know this stranger.
The boy sat as far on the opposite side of the bench as he could. His nervous hands stiffened in her company. Out of his peripheral vision he watched the light of her screen illuminate her tear stained face. However, he couldn’t make out what she looked like; he wouldn’t allow himself even a quick glimpse. He could tell simply by the hold-your-breath nature of her presence that she must be striking, beautiful perhaps. If only he could say something to make her smile maybe she could do the same for him. He couldn’t help but crave her friendship or even just one simple conversation. However at these thoughts his tongue swelled in his throat and his lips tightened and gripped his teeth: he had absolutely nothing to say to her. Besides, she didn’t come here for a heart to heart. She was without a doubt waiting for a bus to take her somewhere to people who love her. She shouldn’t be bothered with meaningless dialogue or spur of the moment relationships. She had her phone out and he knew that she had all the company she’d ever want. She doesn’t need him therefore he would do his best to stare off into the distance not needing her.
While the two sat in substantial stillness, one fiddling with her phone and one twittling his thumbs, the moon rose high into the black starless sky. Repressed desire for any sort of connection filled the night air with an unbearable tension. Figuring that each of them had missed whatever bus they had been waiting for, the girl and the boy left the bench. They walked wearily into the night, more alone than before, in opposite directions.


The author's comments:
This piece depicts the heart break that comes with missed opportunities. Every needs to be reached out to so why hold back?

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