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No Regrets

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It was 6:30am in my house and there was already chaos. I heard my mom call for me from the bottom of the stairs.
“Emily Smith, I f your not down here in two seconds the family chore chart is going to have your name all over it!”
The moment I heard that I hoped out of bed a charged down the stairs. I sat at my normal spot at the breakfast table and began to eat the Cinnamon Toast Crunch Cereal already prepared for me. At the table my little brother Josh, who is 6, was chomping on his
Cocoa Puffs while trying to tell a story about how he got sand in his shorts in first grade class yesterday. I usually don’t listen to his stories that often because they are normally totally random or disgusting. Instead I will talk to Lily, my eight year old sister. Since she is only five years younger than me, we have a lot more in command than a six year old who manages to get sand in his pockets every day. My older brother, Mike, who is sixteen usually, tries to listen to Josh’s stories, but you just get bored after a while.
After I was done with breakfast I went upstairs to get ready. After fishing through my drawers for the perfect shirt for the day before Winter break starts I ran outside to catch the bus. Where I sat next to my best friend in the whole world, Megan. We chatted about how ugly Mark Jones’ holiday sweater was and what Megan was going to do in Costa Rica over Christmas. When we got off the bus we made our way to our first class of the day, Social Studies, which I am good at it just bores me to sleep.
Class began like usual having Mr. Wall tell us a random U.S. fact. Today’s fact was pretty interesting; he said that all former U.S. presidents get security around them for the rest of their lives. This is a good Idea if you think about it because you were once one of the most famous people in the United States of America for at least four years.
After that I was called to the office, which surprised me because usually the bad kids get called to the office, no t a regular kid like me.
I walked into the office and my mom was staring at me with a sad and serious expression.

She walked up to me and said the worst words I could hear, “Grandma died of a heart attack about an hour ago, I’m sorry.”

I was in such shock, I had no idea if I was supposed to say something or not or cry or be brave, and I had never been through this experience. I stood there for about a minute before I noticed I had been standing there with my mouth hanging open in shock and closed it.

My mom began to lead me out the front door of my school after I collected all of my school supplies. We had a very quiet and awkward drive home from school. When we arrived at our house, I slugged up the stairs and into my room where I sat on my bed for what seemed like forever. I sat there for at least three hours thinking about how my life would change without my grandma around, and how I would not be able to go to a lunch and a movie with her every weekend. I would never be called snuggle bug again, or even see her face again.

Mom finally called everyone down for dinner at around 10pm so we could all vent out our tears for a good ten hours. Since she was so upset she had my dad order Domino’s pizza.

I stared at my plate of pizza, which is usually my favorite type of food looked very boring. I did not even have one bite.

At around 11pm I slowly plodded to my room, my head touched the pillow and I was out like a light.

I heard a slight knock and saw the bright sunlight peering through my window. I knew that know like the back of my own hand, it was mom. She stepped in and noticed that I was okay and left. I knew she knew that I was awake even though I was faced the opposite way as her.

I got on some comfy cloths and headed down stairs. I sat on our comfy couch where the rest of the house hold was. We were giving each other a lot of unsure looks.

My mom, being the way she is, told us the plan for the day, “ Alright guys, today we are going to go to the place where grandma is going to get buried and then we can just hang out here and If you guys want you can write something to say at grandma’s funeral.”

The moment she said that I knew I wanted to write something, but I knew I would never be able to with my confidence. I knew my sister would write one and my little brother would attempt to. I could at least try but I it would be better for me to keep my feeling inside like I always do. If I do write something no one would be able to hear me through my sobs.

When we finished our plans for the day I sat at my desk and did my hw to get my mind off everything and so if I end up going to school sooner than my mom plans I won’t be even more stressed out. My family was getting a little back to normal, but not the same. Tomorrow was going to the funeral and I knew everyone was going to lose it and we would need more than a box of tissues.

I woke up really early to get ready, the whole time I was getting ready I was thinking about a lot of things, but mostly if I had made the right decision to not write something.

We arrived at the funeral home and out family got our own personal room from everyone else. All around there were signs and cards saying “Ruth Hynes you will be missed.” The name was different because it was my mom’s mom.
As I sat there listening to different people saying good things about my grandma the guilt kept getting bigger of not writing anything. It was almost the end of the service and my mom was speaking. I knew if I did not say anything I would feel bad for the rest of my life.
I crept up to my mom in the front of everyone and tapped her shoulder. She looked down and knew why I was there. She scooted over and I knew it was my time to show my grandma how much I loved her. I began in a soft voice just saying I love her and after a few minutes I got more comfortable and told them what fun I had with her and why I lover here and anything I could remember her. I talked about her for more than an hour. It was the best thing I could have done to help myself and let my grandmother know how I feel about her. If I would have not said anything I would have regret it for the rest of my life. I know have no regrets.





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