Goodbye Daddy, I'll Be Okay

I stood there with my mother, just looking at the casket. I felt numb, nothing bothered me, I was there looking at the casket not knowing what was going on. It had happened so fast, but at the same time so slow. First we were in the car driving, then we were at the hospital, and then we were here at the church looking at the casket.

I didn’t know what to do, say, or even how to feel. I just stood there as people walked up to me and gave me a hug saying different things but at the same time they all meant the same.


“I know what you’re going though”


“This is tough but you’ll get through it.”


“I’m so sorry.”

Did they really know what I was going though? Was I going to get through it? I cant argue with the I’m sorry. But I just stood there and nodded I didn’t speak. It was too hard. As the line ended we all took our seats. My mom and I’s in the front row. The pastor walked out and said a few words of God. We stood again and sang a song. I felt numb and didn’t know what was going on. When the song was over the pastor said “Lily has something she wants to read.” I stood up and walked up to the stand, I took out the piece of paper that I had written on and unfolded it. I started to read it. I told myself not to cry so I tried.

“My Daddy, my hero, the first man I loved, the man who was always there for me. I’m 16 and am standing here before you telling you about my father, who is dead. My daddy was there for me from the first time I fell down and hurt my knee, to when I got my heart broken. My daddy was there when I needed help with something, always eager to listen to my problems. Everyone knew that my daddy was one of my best friends. We had a relationship that not many father and daughters have. I was lucky. My hero, I don’t know how to tell you how much I looked up to him. Every time I talked to a guy I always had my dad’s voice in the back of my head. I will always be daddy’s little girl. He was the first man I looked in the eyes, he was there picking me up when I was crying though the night as a baby. I love my daddy, I always will. I will never forget the night of the accident. Everyone said it happened so fast, but for me it was like I was living in slow motion and no matter what I couldn’t get out of it. I remember sitting in the waiting room thinking: why him, what has he done. I prayed to God to save him, I told God that I needed him in my life. Then the doctor came out and said that he hadn’t made it, and broke. I didn’t get to say goodbye to my daddy. I looked over at my mom and saw how hurt she was, she lost the love of her life. I remember that whole night like it just happened today. But I also have good memories of my daddy to remember. Goodbye daddy, wait for me and mommy up there, I know you’ll be looking down and watching over us.”


I walked back to my spot by my mom. The pastor said a few more words and then the casket was closed. We all stood up and sang Amazing Grace, and my mom and I walked out behind the casket. Walking down the aisle I was slowing breaking again. This was goodbye for a while. I stood there with my mother, looking at the hearse. I felt numb not knowing what to think. I said to myself “Goodbye daddy, I’ll be okay.





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pieceofheart said...
Jun. 27, 2009 at 2:24 am
this is really sad and if this is your story, im sorry about your dad. But bad things happen for reasons. To help you grow and mature from them
Keep writing beautifully like this and like you said, you will be okay :)
 
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