One in a million

May 7, 2009
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Tears. There seem to be quite a lot of those. Every ones crying, Well, I shouldn’t expect much more at a funeral but lately it seems like my whole life has turned into one big tear drop.

I’m still finding it hard to grasp the fact that mum’s gone, I guess that’s why I haven’t cried yet, I mean I’ve had my little sobs but I’m still waiting for my final outburst, not actually looking forward to that one though. I guess that will mean that I have accepted she’s gone, not coming back, and I’m not ready for that yet.

Or it could just be that I’m a heartless bastard who won’t shed a tear for the one person in her life who truly cared.

Mum touched everyone in her life. Everyone here, gathered in this cold dark cemetery, had a story to tell about my mother. They ranged from the truly deep thoughtful tales to the story’s of just plain kindness. From the story of how she once helped an old lady with her groceries to the story of how she saved a young girl from depression.

Mum was truly amazing, every waking minute of her life was spent worrying about someone else, I guess that’s what killed her in the end, she was worrying to much about everything else that she couldn’t spare a second for herself.

You see, mum knew she was going to die, she knew she was going to die since she was thirteen years old. But that only made her stronger, she thrived to do as much as she could in her given time. Maybe that’s why she held out longer than the doctors ever hoped. When my mother was diagnosed with cancer she was told that she would probably only have five years left, the cancer had spread to far for them to stop it but they started chemo anyway. Its a mystery to this day how mum made it to thirty three when she was expected to reach only eighteen.

My fathers grip on my hand tightened. He was another miracle of life, he met my mother in hospital when he was visiting his dad, they fell in love and married. Simple as that really. It never bothered him that he was a destined widow he just enjoyed every second of her company while it lasted.

They had me in 1987. Mum has done so much for me and Dad in these past 15 years. She is a true inspiration, and I’m gonna miss her like hell.

It appeared that everyone was now heading out of the church. I was given a million and one kisses and a million and one cuddles by a million and one friends and told a million and one things about my mother. I smiled politely and said my million and one thank yous as they all walked out side to their cars.

As the last car pulled away, I turned to my father and collapsed into his waiting arms. Then I cried, I cried for my mother, I cried for my father, I cried for all my friends and all my family, and I cried for the million and one people who had never had the privilege to meet this amazing woman, I cried until there were no tears left before slowly making my way to the car with my father and going home to our seemingly empty house.

My mother was one in a million.





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