The Escape

March 6, 2017
By groomset BRONZE, Ionia, Michigan
groomset BRONZE, Ionia, Michigan
1 article 0 photos 0 comments

I was strolling down the leaf filled trail with huge sequoia trees encompassing me when it happened, I heard the clunking of the bell. Everyone knew what that meant, it was time to fall in line. I made it to the edge of the woods on the outskirts of the village and saw herds of people in groups like buffalos walking toward the castle. It was only a half mile walk from the village to the castle, but it took what felt like a millennium, where everyone would be huddled together like pigs in a blanket waiting for the next bell to sound, which meant it would be time.

You're probably wonderstruck to what is happening but I can't tell you yet, that comes later.

My name is Blimpy Lingiesi, i’m 6’ 1”, brown hair, a slim guy. Something that sticks out about me is I wear the same clothes everyday, so if you’re trying to find me look for brown pants and a dark blue shirt. I live in the old raggedy rundown house right outside of the village in the green open land of the forest. My house is right outside of a great village called Bree. I occasionally go into Bree to trade my goods that I grow in my spectacular garden filled with juicy tomatoes and great cucumbers, but other than that and going to the castle everytime I hear the clunking cry, I don't get out to see or talk to many people. Alright now you know some of my conditions, let's get back to what you want to hear about.

We made it to the castle and what do you know, we were all huddled together barely enough room to breath. Everyone was waiting in anticipation, adults, teens, kids, and even infants, to what was coming. We all saw it at different moments, the people in the front saw it first. It was treacherous. The thing had white glowing eyes like a lightbulb that you just put in, it's hair looked like vines wrapping around a tree but instead of a tree it was it's hair. It was hard to look at without thinking about the nightmares that I would have about it tonight! Its mouth was probably cut with a piece of bark because it wasn't a clean cut. There was something on it's face, it looked like it bobbed for apples but instead of the apples in water, they were in acid. The burns were in an apple shape, up along its nose, under and above it's eyes.

They put it in chains that locked tight around its wrists, cutting into the flesh. The big muscular guards around it started getting all the “instruments” ready for when the time would come. They approached the beast with the tools in hand. It was helpless, just sitting in the chains nowhere to go. Silence. Yelling. Running.


The Witch


“Ahhhh,” everyone was screaming in terror.

A plan, I needed a plan! They are eventually going to get me if I don't think of a plan. I tried using my powers to get out of here but they didn't work. They must be blocking my powers somehow. The castle, I can hide in there.

“Oh no, it has escaped.”
“Run!” shouted a person right beside me.
My natural reaction was to run out the front gate, but that is what the witch wants us to do so he can pick us off in a big herd like slaughtering day for pigs. I trucked it toward the castle.
Got to one of the little doors that led to the safety of the castle, and it was locked.
Luckily there was a window above the door a little ways that was opened. I climbed up the unstable side of the castle hoping I lived to see the next day, but that was the least of my worries there was a freaking maniac running loose on the grounds. My body was trembling as I was climbing, as I got to the window, holding on as hard as I could, I swung my legs in and let go at the same time.

“Heh, I made it.”

I wandered around the castle looking for an escape route but my luck I didn't find anything.

“Whoa, what was that,” said Blimpy. It sounded like someone is hurt.

I turned the corner and there it was, staring deep into my soul, I couldn't look away.

It was the witch!

We were staring at eachother like some people stare at food. We didn't look away, then he ran and I ran after him. We both ducked and weaved through obstacles all throughout the castle. He jumped over something that I didn't see and I tripped over it and fell. I got back up immediately and pursued him again. I turned a corner and saw him standing there. We reached a dead end. He turned around and we stared at eachother again. I didn't want to do it but I had to, if I didn't I was going to get caught and then have to go back to trial for a year then I would be executed. I pulled the blade from my pocket that the guards gave to me right before they let me loose.


I was trapped, had nowhere to go. He came closer, it was like looking into a slave owner's eyes on whipping day. He crept toward me until he was practically on top of me. I was scared stiff not knowing what was coming until it hit me. He broke the skin with something, and penetrated, luckily, nothing important. I’ve never been stabbed before and now I know what it feels like. It feels actually like nothing. I would live as long as I didn't lose too much blood. I couldn't feel anything after that point, I went numb. He got me right above the waist on the outer side. I fell to the ground still not feeling anything, as he walked away.

I was there for a couple hours. I was alone and shivering, I was going to die right here in this spot, until I heard hope.

“Hello, is anyone there,” someone said.

I tried to call back, but my body wouldn't allow me to. My body was trapping my voice inside it like a caged animal. I tried my best to crawl towards the hope of a voice. It was no use, I had no strength, so I banged on the walls as hard as I could and then listened for a second just hoping the person was coming. I didn't hear anything. At that point was when lost all hope. I curled up in a ball and was prepared to die.
“Bye mom, I love you,” I said crying. Then I went limp and blacked out.

I woke up in my room on my bed with equipment all around me. Instantly I could feel something taped to my arm. It wasn't a bad feeling it was just out of place. I looked down and I had and IV stuck in me with blood pumping through the crystal clear tubes.
“I’m alive,” I whispered.

The author's comments:

Authors Note

I am Seth Groom, I am 14 and live in Ionia. I chose this topic of my story for one main reason, when we did free writes in class on many different topics, this one just stood out to me. In my own opinion it was my best start, grabber and beginning, out of any of the other topics we wrote about. I developed this mostly just by writing things down that I thought of and if they fit I kept it in there and if they weren't the best fit then I would think of something else.

I am most proud of my grabber and beginning paragraph, also when I described the witch. I am proud of that because it was my best use of descriptive details.

Some things that improved in my writing as I wrote, were my descriptive details and trying to show not tell. I am still not a master at it but I have improved a lot.

If I were to continue to write stories my next topic would probably be something about aliens invading earth. I would write about this because I love science fiction and some movies i've seen with aliens invading are just really well made and I would want to do that just with a book instead of a movie. 

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