I am writing this letter because I think we need to talk about our relationship. You are just not who I fell in love with in the beginning, and we are in totally different places in our lives right now. What I am trying to say is that I think we should break up. All the problems began when you started the navigation acts. They were laws passed to restrict the use of foreign trade in the colonies, and that meant that I could only trade with you. I feel that you were being really territorial with me, and the only reason you did not enforce that acts was because it cost too much for you. After the big fight I went through with the French and Indians, I thought you were going to be more supportive of me, especially since I won. Instead, you passed new taxes to make me pay back for the money used in the war. First came the sugar act that taxed our sugar and molasses, but luckily I was able to get it repealed. Second came the stamp act, which taxed all our paper products, and I tried to reason with you at first but you would not listen. I had to get your attention with boycotts and riots, and finally after British merchants lost a lot of money, you revoked it. Then came, the declaratory act which allowed you to have total authority over me, and lastly there was the townshend duties that taxed paint, tea, glass, and lead. I was able to protest against it with “taxation without representation” and by boycotting, but you removed all taxes except for the one on tea. This is when I began thinking that maybe we just were not working as a couple anymore.
Additionally, after the French and Indian War, you began the proclamation of 1763. This allowed you to forbid me from moving west beyond the Appalachian mountains. I am still really upset about this as we really needed new lands for farming. I also wanted to continue expanding the colonies to discover more of the country that I now know as my home. I know that this might all come as a surprise to you, but our relationship is over and it has been for a while. All of these problems might have also been linked to the start of the great awakening. The great awakening was an evangelical revival movement where preachers used powerful emotional sermons to reach people. It also meant that each person could have an individual relationship with God. This might have caused you to think that I was challenging you and your authority regarding the Anglican Church and the power of the king. I know that you thought that maybe if I could worship God on my own, then maybe I could govern myself too and that angered you a lot.
The last straw for me was the Boston Massacre when everything turned bloody. I know that the colonies were forming an anti-British mob riot at the Boston customhouse, but you did not have to do what you did. The colonists were very angry and enraged, but that is no excuse for you to shoot them.
Your soldiers fired into the crowd and ended up killing five people. You also passed The Coercive Acts or Intolerable Acts which sole purpose was to to punish me until I paid you back for the 15,000 pounds of East India Company tea that I threw into the Boston Harbor. I only did that because I was still not okay with the tax you placed on tea. You ended up closing the Port of Boston which therefore made it impossible for me to make any more money, and then you put me under martial law. I think the best thing we could do right now is end our relationship to finally put an end to our problems. I am just trying to do what is best for the both of us, and I hope that we can still be friends.