Thievery.

November 30, 2010
By SilentlyRising GOLD, Decatur, Georgia
SilentlyRising GOLD, Decatur, Georgia
13 articles 0 photos 100 comments

Favorite Quote:
"My pen is the barrel of the gun. Remind me which side you should be on."


A cold breeze swept through the streets, causing many of the inhabitants to pull whatever clothes they had on closer to their freezing bodies. Even though the temperature was low, the marketplace was still filled with people selling, buying, and trading whatever they could to stock up for the winter. But, among those who actually had money, there were a few novice thieves. They would roam about like a buyer would, and, while one of their team distracted a vendor, the other would lift whatever was small and wouldn't be missed. This was how a particular team of two sisters operated. The older one, a girl of twenty-two named Addison, would start up a conversation while her younger sister stole whatever she could get her twelve-year old hands on. There was a big risk in thievery, though. For, in this town, if someone committed a crime, what body part that person used would be cut off. If someone stole, a hand would be amputated. For rape, well, I’m sure you get the idea. But, back to the team of thieving girls.

The day had dragged on to noon and the pair is about to get a hearty lunch of fruit. “Are you sure this is fresh?” Addison demanded hotly. “Everything you see was just picked this morning by me wife,” the man replied, offence lacing his voice. She discreetly made a motion for Martha, the younger one, to begin her theft. “How can I be sure this fruit wasn’t rotting in your garden?”

“Lady, do you see anything wrong with the food?”

“There’s a bruise on this apple.”

“So don’t buy that one!” He exclaimed, throwing his hands in the air. Addie stole a glance back at Martha, who was clutching two apples, two peaches, and a bundle of grapes. She gave the younger girl a small nod and turned her attention back to the man. “Perhaps I’ll take my business elsewhere!” She exclaimed. “Perhaps you should! Go be someone else’s problem,” he snarled back. With a small huff, she turned and began to walk stiffly to where her sister waited. Martha was carefully stowing stolen food into the woven basket that was laid carelessly in the crook of her arm. “How much did you get?” Addie asked breathlessly.

“Enough,” came the reply. A slow smile spread across the older girl’s face. “Let’s go home,” she said, taking the younger girl’s free hand. “Home” was an alley with a few scattered newspapers and a cardboard box. What were two blossoming girls doing sleeping in an alley? Simple: they were runaways. It was them against a cold, unforgiving world. The pair settled down on the filthy ground and dug into their meals. Outside, everyone passed by, unaware of the suffering that laid between the brick walls.


The author's comments:
Just got bored and, well, wrote. One of my friends said that they liked it, so I decided to post it. Enjoy.

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This article has 7 comments.


on Feb. 1 2012 at 7:33 pm
SilentlyRising GOLD, Decatur, Georgia
13 articles 0 photos 100 comments

Favorite Quote:
"My pen is the barrel of the gun. Remind me which side you should be on."

Haha. Maybe. I have no idea what do do for it, though.

on Feb. 1 2012 at 7:12 pm
Musicalartist, Xxxxx, Other
0 articles 0 photos 145 comments
i agree, sequel coming soon?? :D

on Dec. 26 2011 at 8:38 am
Sherry.K SILVER, Jakarta, Illinois
6 articles 0 photos 27 comments
Wow! Breath-taking. The descriptions were amazing! Keep writing :)

leafy said...
on Sep. 22 2011 at 12:14 pm
leafy, City, Other
0 articles 0 photos 682 comments

Favorite Quote:
Gil: I would like you to read my novel and get your opinion. 
Ernest Hemingway: I hate it. 
Gil: You haven't even read it yet. 
Ernest Hemingway: If it's bad, I'll hate it. If it's good, then I'll be envious and hate it even more. You don't want the opinion of another writer. 

Nice story! I loved the descriptions, it was detailed nicely. But yeah, I would separate the dialogue. Other than that, I think a sequel (or a novel with this) would do nicely. Keep up the good work!

on Aug. 4 2011 at 10:16 pm
MidnightFire PLATINUM, Lincoln, Illinois
40 articles 6 photos 239 comments

Favorite Quote:
'Dream as if you will live forever, live as if you'll die tomorrow.'
for my sister: 'when life gives me lemons ... i eat them'
'do not be afraid, be faithful'
'God is not safe, but He's good'

Oooh! this was really good :) you should continue this, you could make a great sequal.

on Jul. 30 2011 at 6:54 pm
JustAnotherOwl SILVER, Unknown, New York
6 articles 0 photos 379 comments

Favorite Quote:
"See, we don't really care who you are;
Everyone is capable of looking up and wishing on a star.
So catch it, so contagious, this day-dreamer's disease,
And hope can be your sword, slaying darkness with belief."

"Sanctuary"- Paradise Fears

I really liked this very much! (That was odd wording, sorry). I agree with Carrie; dialogue should be seperated. Other than that, I thought this was perfect! The detail is really great and I loved the story. Maybe it could do without the explanation at the end...? Just my opinion, which not even I take seriously :) Anyway, very good!

on Jul. 23 2011 at 9:57 pm
CarrieAnn13 GOLD, Goodsoil, Other
12 articles 10 photos 1648 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by." --Douglas Adams

"The object of life is not to be on the side of the majority, but to escape finding oneself in the ranks of the insane." --Marcus Aurelius

Nice!  You should really put the dialogue on new lines everytime a new character speaks, though.  Other than that, good work!




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