April 1, 2010
By afilman PLATINUM, Pewaukee, Wisconsin
afilman PLATINUM, Pewaukee, Wisconsin
24 articles 0 photos 0 comments

“Kelly, I’ll uhh call you tomorrow,” Tiger Woods said as he slipped between the closing metal doors of the elevator.

“It’s Sara….” Tiger’s fling said as the doors met in the middle.
“Are you caught in a bad romance?” asked Lady Gaga as she adjusted her perfectly strait blonde wig.
“It’s all a love game,” Tiger said. “You know how that is.” He pulled out his cell phone discovering his 12 missed calls and three texts, all from different, beautiful women.
Tiger hadn’t notice Tinker Bell when he walked in. She was circling his head.
Lady Gaga altered her purely sequenced dress while glancing seductively in Tiger’s direction.
The elevator screeched to a stop as Tinker Bells face become red with rage.
“What is going on here? Why is the elevator stopping?” Tiger said refusing to unglue his eyes from his cell phone screen.
“It’s totally the paparazzi, quick put on your poker face and maybe they won’t know it’s you.” Said Lady Gaga.
Tinker Bell let out a mix between a yell and a laugh. “They will never know I’m the one who stopped the elevator.” Tinker Bell thought. The elevator doors slid open just enough to see a blank cement wall, confirming they were stuck between floors. Tinker bell flew out the little crack in the door leaving lady Gaga alone with Tiger.
“Who does she think she is leaving us alone?” Lady Gaga asked while applying pure glitter eye shadow. The combination of her eyes and her dress made her hard to look at without squinting.
“She’s probably star struck… again you know how that is,” Tiger said, this time glancing up from his phone, only for it to vibrate slightly in his hands, instantly luring his eyes back to the screen. Within seconds his fingers were franticly dancing with the keys.
Suddenly, there was a cracking from the ceiling, a small yelp escaping from an ancient looking speaker, which no one had noticed.
“Tiger Woods’.” A beaming voice came over the speaker.
The voice startling Tiger caused his hands to lose the tight grip they held on his phone. His phone somersaulted through the air before shattering as it hit the ground. “NOOO” Tiger said, “Who are you and what do you want from me?”
A voice that sounded as though it emerged from the bottom of the ocean said, “I am Tinker Bell.”
“Tink? That’s you honey?” Lady Gaga said her eyes as wide as snow balls.
“Yes it’s me,” Tinker Bell replied. “And you two are stuck in this elevator until Tiger Woods agrees to put his life of escorts and hotel flings aside and become my husband.”
Tiger’s face became white, “You mean no more women? No more mistresses? No more vacation flings?”
“That’s exactly what I am asking for,” Tinker Bell said. You could hear the satisfaction in her voice.
“Fine, if that’s what it takes, Tinker Bell, I LOVE YOU and only you,” Tiger said, and just like that the elevator started to move, but Tiger had no idea what he had gotten himself into.

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