5th Twilight: Glistening Sin (Renesmee's Story) Chapter 3 | Teen Ink

5th Twilight: Glistening Sin (Renesmee's Story) Chapter 3

November 28, 2009
By dkA.M SILVER, Vail, Arizona
dkA.M SILVER, Vail, Arizona
8 articles 0 photos 87 comments

Chapter 3

As we drove out of the drive way in the Volvo, I reached for Jacob's hand. He took it and braced it by his heart. He was so warm and gentle. He always seemed to be there when ever my most memorable moments were happening. He was family and I hope it will always be that way. I just think that the Cullen house hold has some type of grudge on him but I have no clue what. He could never do anything wrong. He was the most perfect man I knew next to Daddy. Just then a glinting set of teeth smiled in the rear view mirror.

As I was having a conversation with myself we had turned into a long twisting dirt road just outside of La Push. As we got deeper in, the trees started to create and larger gap and let me see what was ahead of me. Bright colored trailers and streamers. Clowns and cotton candy. Sparkling lights and games. The bright colors were all reflecting off the Christmas snow.

"Welcome to the yearly La Push Christmas Carnival Ness!" Jacob yelped in excitement. " The only time we can have a carnival because its the only time its not raining."
I chuckled lightly and graciously said," Thank you so much!" I hugged Jacob tightly and kissed him on the cheek. He blushed like on one of those old movies that Grandma watches with me. It has the boy who gets kissed in the 5th grade by a girl they really like and then at an unnatural speed, their face turns bright red and steam shoots out their ears.

I swear my grin was ear to ear by now because out of all of the experiences I have had in my short life, this was never one of them.

As Daddy pulled into park, I quickly jumped out of the car before it had come to a complete stop and waved my hand for them to hurry up. This was a big moment for me. Daddy had never been to la push because their was something about him not being aloud because of a treaty, but I guess it broke because he was here now!

As they all slid out of their seats gracefully and I started to walk towards the lights like a night bug attracted to lamps, and of course they were all by my side in an instant, walking with me at my "fast pace". All of them were so confident with them selves. So tall and so strong. Except for me. I was the only one not this way. The only one without

the ability to not have fear.

Daddy stared at me in confusion. He looked as if he was about to be taken from this earth. Why the sudden mood change?

Then it clicked, he heard me again. He probably would have given me the talk if Jacob and Mommy weren't around. " You are beautiful and at a much higher level than any of us."
It gets annoying after be told it many times. I guess that's how brain washing goes, it's annoying because you hear it so much but then it sticks in your head forever. Although there is a difference between brain washing and my situation, when your brain washed you do and believe anything your told. With me, I never will believe that statement.

As we walk through the main entrance, a ticket man in a black trench coat, with a large stomach, and a greasy bald scalp, asks for our tickets and I look over at my parent's, just to make sure that they had them, and of course, they did.

Walking into the carnival was so magical. It felt like my own little fantasy story, without the crazy villain trying to destroy the infamous hero.

Instead of shuffling my feet to every carousal and cotton candy machine there was, I decided to skip to them, and hum the beautiful claire de lune. The song that was played at the cottage almost every hour of every day. In the background everywhere I wandered that seemed adventurous, and fun.

Then I saw it, the most beautiful thing to ever be created on this wonderful world. The Tea Cups. They spun in circles so fast that they became a blur of rainbows after ten seconds of the ride beginning. Now that's my kind of adrenaline.

I pulled on Jake's arm and yanked him in line. "Ok, Ok Nessie I know you want to ride now could you please let your precious body builder hands off my arm?" He said kind of screechingly. Funny enough, I had more muscles than him because technically I was a new vampire, and they were extremely strong.

If there was anyone I wanted to ride with first it was him. He could make that cup spin faster then any creature to have been created. Ah.. I chose a great best friend or maybe it was the other way around.

Mom and Dad understood that I wanted to ride with Jake and just told us to have fun while they played darts at one of the stations they had. Mom really wanted the stuffed bear for some reason. I mean it's a stuffed animal, they don't do much ya know.

Dad then looked at me in a sort of disappointed way, like I had ruined a surprise or something.

As Jake and I hoped inside the cup, it made a creaking noise. He was a little to heavy for the whethered old ride. After putting on the seat belt, [that probably would not help at all if anything happened anyway] the ride was off! Then it was just me staring straight into Jacob's eye's and his into mine. It was really nice.

We spun round and round for a time that felt like forever and we just kept our eyes on each other. It was like we were both empowering each other to keep going and not throw up. It would really be bad for me if I upchucked because it would not be the chunky pale colored regurgitation, it would be bright, red, blood. You see I have the same stuff that any other human has to deal with. I get sick and I can eat regular food and still get the same amount of protein I get from blood, it's just the red liquid tastes better, hands down.

If Jacob's stomach ended up giving up on him, well then he would be fine. It would look normal and everything, but it would be extreme amounts of it. While using my time with Jacob to think about the bodie's waste, my favorite adventure came to a slow but sudden stop. I was the first to hop out and let me tell you, things were not looking good in the visionary department. My eye's seemed like they were still on the ride and I could see the same thing was happening to Jacob. He was no longer walking but swaying. But this ride had so much to it. With it's long time recovery after, and exhilerating fun during you just can not go wrong with it. I would have ridden it 50 more times that day if I was able too.

"So did you two both have fun?" Mommy asked with a sarcastic grin.
"What a, what a," then it was all over. that poor trash can. Having to go threw all of that torture. Jacob's grunts and sound effects were not helping either. Of course, when he was done he had to finish his sentence with acid breath,"What a rush." I giggled as I began to see the relief on his face.

"Way to show Ness just one more vivid picture Jacob." My mom spoke trying to be angry but it was just not working out for her, so she laughed.

"Okay, I think we should show her just one more thing." Daddy spoke in his smooth voice.

"I'm in...." Jake answered
So then I nodded my head and said, " I'm with him."

As we wandered through the sea of people to my next and last ride at the carnival, I watched snowflakes fly on to my face one by one. Every one landed and then instantly melted. It was a light sprinkle nothing as bad that they would have to close the carnival for the day. Just enough to realize that every snowflake just glided past Mom and Dad. Every flake just deflected off their skin. It was like the Matrix Christmas special. For Jacob, before they even touched his skin they turned into a rain drop because of the heat that came off of his body.

Workers are keeping the rides clean of snow by sweeping it and plowing it off. It is fun to watch them sweat and put such effort in to pushing frozen water. I could do that with my pinky if I wanted too.

Then Dad stops suddenly right in front of a gigantic lit up wheel. It has these bench like things hanging from it and people start to sit down on them and are strapped in with a seatbelt. I guess this is a ride that goes maybe less than five mph.

Dad, mom, and Jacob got in line, so I followed.
"What is this?" I thought out loud.
"The Ferris Wheel." Mom answered. " Your grandpa would take me here almost every christmas eve. He would tell me that if I looked hard enough I could see Santa Claus and his reindeer doing their magic for Christmas. I wish there was a magical man out in this world like him." She whirled around and gave Dad a sarcastic grin.
Hopefully I would find my perfect match too. It would be so nice to have someone to be with almost every second of every day and want to be with that person. Sadly, I don't know if that will ever happen. When I stop aging at 13, it will be hard to find a life long partner that stays 13 forever like me.

We were suddenly at the front of the line and that made me excited. The ticket man told us that there were two- four to a bench. Lucky for us we had exactly that.

As we buckle up I am squished in between Daddy and Jake. Dad Is on the farthest left then me, then Jake, then Mom.

The ride starts with a jerk. In front of us are two heads of two people. A girl and a boy. They seem like high schoolers or freshman in college. I can't tell. They were on the ride before us. so I was not able to see their faces.

The girl turns around while laughing, and then as she sees us her face turns into a puzzled expression. " Bella? Is that you?"

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This article has 74 comments.

dkA.M SILVER said...
on Dec. 2 2010 at 8:44 pm
dkA.M SILVER, Vail, Arizona
8 articles 0 photos 87 comments


 I just read ur comment :D

I hope u check back soon!! :D

What university???Oooh a writing club! Astounding! Good for you :D

3 months since I have talked to you sorry about that :( 

I just finished my first novel!! I am so pumped I just sent my manuscript to writers house wish me luck... and I wish you luck in College :D

on Nov. 29 2010 at 11:25 am
MysteryHeart GOLD, Thorold, Other
14 articles 0 photos 60 comments

Favorite Quote:
Usted es especial! AKWARD!!! (in an opera like voice), ohhh fasha', what the huh?,who in the name of what?, sanity now!

it really cute kinda waiting for the climax. i would suggest imagining what the actors would say and how they would say it. but i do want to read what happens next

on Nov. 15 2010 at 6:31 pm
AnonymouslyAnonymous BRONZE, Nassau, Other
1 article 0 photos 23 comments

Favorite Quote:
Can I tell you a secret? Yeah Sure. It is Never a secret if you tell someone.

btw i loved it ! its awesome and you should continue writing its about time renesmee has her point of view

on Nov. 15 2010 at 6:28 pm
AnonymouslyAnonymous BRONZE, Nassau, Other
1 article 0 photos 23 comments

Favorite Quote:
Can I tell you a secret? Yeah Sure. It is Never a secret if you tell someone.

My bad its 7

on Nov. 15 2010 at 6:15 pm
AnonymouslyAnonymous BRONZE, Nassau, Other
1 article 0 photos 23 comments

Favorite Quote:
Can I tell you a secret? Yeah Sure. It is Never a secret if you tell someone.

i thought it was 5 and when she was 5 years ld she would lok the age of her daddy

VampireX GOLD said...
on Nov. 11 2010 at 7:29 am
VampireX GOLD, Spotsylvania, Virginia
18 articles 0 photos 81 comments
isn't the stoping age 14? I don't have my copy of breaking dawn on me but...

on Nov. 8 2010 at 6:27 pm
RBrown201 BRONZE, Miami, Florida
3 articles 0 photos 21 comments

on Nov. 5 2010 at 10:36 am
xprezzionstar BRONZE, Jeffersonville, Kentucky
3 articles 0 photos 57 comments

Favorite Quote:
All it takes it 20 seconds of insane courage and I promise you, something amazing will happen

this is great add more!!!!

redz14 SILVER said...
on Oct. 20 2010 at 10:28 pm
redz14 SILVER, Bridgeton, New Jersey
7 articles 0 photos 21 comments
I agree with you. Also, it said she aged less and less each day. So, maybe she is 8 or 9.  But other wise I loved the story! 2 thumbs :)

on Sep. 17 2010 at 8:11 pm
freewriter_123 SILVER, Miramar, Florida
6 articles 0 photos 75 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Whoever said nothing was impossible never tried slamming a revolving door." ;)

this is o good. plz write more asap

on Sep. 14 2010 at 11:39 am
WriterA.M. PLATINUM, Denver, Colorado
40 articles 0 photos 58 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Ignore corruption and achieve perfection"- me

Yeah. My first three weeks. :) Trying to get a writing group started, too.

dkA.M SILVER said...
on Sep. 13 2010 at 7:10 pm
dkA.M SILVER, Vail, Arizona
8 articles 0 photos 87 comments
Welll then submit them!!! Haha u must be in college now huh?! ;)

on Aug. 16 2010 at 8:31 pm
this is okay, but im wondering how long after breaking dawn is this, she should be around the age of 12 or 13 maybe less. She ages fast in breaking dawn growing almost everyday and she should atleast be 10, i read your other chapter and it says that shes sleeping in a crib. Shes to big for a crib. I was just wondering about that

on Aug. 9 2010 at 1:42 pm
WriterA.M. PLATINUM, Denver, Colorado
40 articles 0 photos 58 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Ignore corruption and achieve perfection"- me

Really? They'd kill for those three little letters? : ) Hehe, it reminds me of the video game under the same title. And you know, I didn't even notice the icon until you pointed it out to me. Hm, I haven't submitted anything here in so long and I have several really good stories.

dkA.M SILVER said...
on Aug. 9 2010 at 12:27 pm
dkA.M SILVER, Vail, Arizona
8 articles 0 photos 87 comments
ok haha she is fine with human blood, remember charlie in breaking dawn? LOL

dkA.M SILVER said...
on Aug. 9 2010 at 12:26 pm
dkA.M SILVER, Vail, Arizona
8 articles 0 photos 87 comments
Haha it's ok. Don't sweat having the littlest of mistakes. Look on the bright side. YOU GOT PUBLISHED! Most kids on this website would kill to have that little mag icon next to their names! Your story was great

on Jul. 29 2010 at 7:30 am
OfficialApprover PLATINUM, Orefield, Pennsylvania
48 articles 0 photos 1754 comments

Favorite Quote:
Grab life by the balls. -Slobberknocker
We cannot change the cards we're dealt just how we play the hand
Experience is what you get when you didn't get what you wanted
It's pretty easy to be smart when you're parroting smart people
-Randy Pausch

This was very good, well-written and interesting,  but there are inconsistencies.  For instance, the Cullens no longer hold any grudge towards Jacob.  Renesmee won't stop aging at thirteen, they said mid-teens, like about sixteen-ish.  And they never mentioned that Renesmee is stronger than Jacob.

I'm sorry, I know how rude this must sound, and it was really a very good story, there are just some things that are different from the book. And as far as the low self-esteem thing in this story...in Breaking Dawn Renesmee was somewhat cocky, and I"m sorry, I just can't really imagine her ending up like this.

on Jul. 28 2010 at 7:17 pm
WriterA.M. PLATINUM, Denver, Colorado
40 articles 0 photos 58 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Ignore corruption and achieve perfection"- me

Oh- I made a mistake in that comment as well. Yes, I'm so crazy that I tell the world about my mistakes.

on Jul. 28 2010 at 7:14 pm
WriterA.M. PLATINUM, Denver, Colorado
40 articles 0 photos 58 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Ignore corruption and achieve perfection"- me

Yes, I too am happy that I got published. But goodness, I winced as I read it in the magazine. There were a number of things that could have been easily fixeed in it. I spend too much time on my novel and so little on my short stories. : (


Anywho, have a nice day. : )

on Jul. 28 2010 at 1:46 pm
AeroAsh87 BRONZE, No., California
1 article 0 photos 9 comments

Favorite Quote:
"To be Old & Wise you must first have to be Young & Stupid."

You HAVE to write a Part 4 or Chapter 4, whatever you wanna call it.  I loved the cliffhanger so much!  You add a cool little twist to the Twilight Saga.  I really would love Stephenie Meyer to make a 5th book.  How old is Renesmee though?  I'm not sure if you ever mentioned it or not.  If you could reply and let me know that would be great!