Wednesday, September 5th, 2009

It was pouring rain as I walked home that Tuesday afternoon. Little did I know what would happen to my best friend the next morning. And yet I didn’t find out until the next day but when I did, my life changed, dramatically. 

Sunday, September 2nd

It was pouring on my way home but I'm not complaining, I love rain. Plus, I had a great weekend with my best friend, Kailey. And we don’t have school Monday due to teacher's in-service. So, this week should be pretty good!

I'll write tomorrow,
Bailey

Monday, September 3rd 

I don’t quite get why they do teacher's in-service on a weekday. Like why don't they just do it on a weekend. I would much rather be at school than at home because my house is super boring, and I can't drive yet so I'm stuck at home. 

I'll write tomorrow,
Bailey

Tuesday morning and I got off the bus and go to my locker like always. But Kailey wasn’t at school like usual, but I didn’t suspect anything. Lunch rolled around and still no Kailey, but I thought she could be sick or on a trip. I didn’t think anything of her not showing up. I made it through the day and by 2:40, I was getting back on the bus and heading home. Once I walk into the door, my dog, Bella greets me with a sequence of barks and whines. I made myself a snack and headed off to my room to start on my review packets. 

Tuesday, September 4th 

Today was a good but slow day. And Kailey wasn’t at school but I'm almost positive that she's either sick or on a trip. The only bad part of my day was the fact that pretty much all my teachers handed out review packets and they're huge! 

I'll write tomorrow,
Bailey

I texted my best friend later that night, but I never got a response. Again, I thought nothing of it. Maybe her phone died or maybe she was busy. She could be doing anything, she's has a busy life, but I never thought she would be busy doing what she was doing. I still, to this day, regret not going over to her house to see if she was home and okay. I partly blame myself for her suicide because if I had gone over there, I could have talked to her about it and probably saved her.

The next morning, I woke up and checked my phone like usual and there was a message from Karen, Kailey's mom. She asked if I would come over after I got home from school. Of course, I said yes. So, I carried on with my day, but everyone seemed to be weighed down with sadness and I wasn’t sure why. Once I got home I headed over to Kailey's house. As Karen opened the door I knew exactly what happened. Karen was a complete mess; her hair had gone a few days without being brushed and she was in sweats and a sweatshirt. 

"Bailey, yes come in. Sit down, we need to talk," Karen said as I walked in and she shut the door. 

I had the worst feeling in my gut. I knew this wasn’t something light. It wasn’t going to be easy to hear. 
"Bailey, none of this is your fault. Please never think that. But you deserve to know about this. I, I woke up this morning around 7:30 like usual to make sure Kailey was up. But I didn't hear her. So, I walked into her room to find her room neat and two envelopes on her bed. One addressed to you and one addressed to me. And I found her body hung in her closet," Karen cries out. I don't let her finish, I run into Kailey's room to find my note and no body. Karen then tells me that the police came and took her body. 

I ran home bawling my eyes out. I never thought I would lose my best friend. I knew she had been bullied but she told me it had stopped. Life wasn’t going to be easy, I wasn’t going to recover soon.
After an ocean of tears and Kailey's funeral, Karen arrived at my door with a small golden box. I opened it and inside was a golden locket with Kailey's ashes and initials engraved on it. I wrapped my arms around Karen and thanked her. 

Sunday, August 27th 

It has been almost two years without Kailey and I'm starting my senior year of high school tomorrow. I'm not sure how this is going to go, this will be my first year of school without her. I attended online school the year she passed and the year after. I wear my locket every day and live for Kailey. She would want my future to be successful. Here's to my senior year and Kailey.

This is for you Kailey,
Bailey