7 months after enlisting in the navy here I stood, in a sinking submarine. Flashing red lights and blaring sirens constantly reminding me of my horrific probable demise. I was going to die without even knowing where I was. I was god knows how deep in a metal can without windows. I didn’t even know what hemisphere I was in. The only thing I knew was that I was going die.

I ignored the screams coming from my comrades. There was no point in following the procedure. We were all going to die anyway. I got up from my bunk and walked down the narrow hallway to the lunch area. As a line of soldiers rushed by me, several of them hitting their heads on the low ceiling, I pictured giants trying to walk through a subway tunnel. I started to laugh at myself then stopped immediately realizing how mad I seemed. Then again, being in a tin can for over 6 months could have quite possibly made me mad.

I walked passed the tables and into the kitchen area where I grabbed a box of lucky charms and milk. What a last meal, I thought to myself. I sat down at one of the tables and began to pour the cereal into a bowl. “What the hell are you doing private? Go to your repair station.” I ignored the man and added milk to my Lucky Charms. Who was he to tell me what to do minutes before my death? He didn’t even know my name. I was going to enjoy my last meal and not carry out these pointless task.

I let the first bite into my left. The explosion of flavors in my mouth was incredible. Food was the only thing I still enjoyed in this damned submarine. This multi million dollar war machine was trash when compared to the 5 dollar box of cereal. Imagine all the boxes of Lucky Charms the government could have bought instead of buying this failing machine. I would have much rathered died surrounded by Lucky Charms then metal.
I took another bite. Just as good as the first. They say moments before your death memories loved ones flash before your eyes. I wonder what I would see since I have never loved anyone. I was a freak at school, always excluded and harassed by my classmates. None of them deserved my love. Maybe I would have loved my parents if I had met them. I certainly didn’t love my foster family. All they used me for was manual labor and a punching bag. At least they fed me Lucky Charms. Maybe I would see a box of lucky charms right before I died.

The third bite had no marshmallows. That was disappointing. The one thing I loved had just disappointed me. It’s a good thing no one loves me or else they’d certainly be disappointed. I started my life out low and went down a little farther every breath I took.  As other had told me before, my existence is a waste of oxygen. Maybe this submarine sinking isn’t the worst thing. Afterall I would most likely make national news.

My 4th bite was all marshmallows and no cereal. Too sweet. There was no substance to it. Once again disappointed by the one thing I loved. Maybe it wasn’t so great after all. The commercials had lied to me just like my Navy recruiter. He told me my life would gain purpose from joining the Navy. Here I stood, in a Navy submarine and my life still had no apparent purpose. He had indirectly killed me. Maybe he saw what a loser I was and sent me on this sub knowing it would sink. I wouldn’t blame him.

I raised my spoon for the fifth bite. “Get the hell up Jenkins. If the sub doesn’t sink I'll kill you myself,” my bunkmate yelled. The yelling startled me, causing me to drop my spoon. I watched the milk slide around the floor in different direction from the ever changing tilt of the submarine. Maybe I didn’t deserve that bite. The man upstairs was telling me I didn’t deserve a last meal. I calmly stood up and returned the cereal box and bowl to their rightful cabinet. Meanwhile the sirens continued to blare and the lights remained flashing.
I wanted to spend my last moments in a calm isolated place. I started making my way towards the munitions area of the sub. There nuke after nuke lined up with barely enough space to walk through. I sat down one of the missiles. Just one of these could wipe out entire countries and here I am using one as a chair. Being nuked wouldn’t be a bad way to go. Quick and painless. Instead I was going to drown. Gasping and struggling to get air. I wish I could let myself just sink to the bottom of the ocean without a fight, but I know my survival instincts would kick in.

I didn’t want to die fighting a hopeless fight. I wish I could move past this world painlessly. I began to think of ways to kill myself within the sub. I could shoot myself but that would be messy. I didn’t want to have a mutilated body. I looked around the room. Maybe I could hang myself with the wires on the ceiling. After all the sub was going to sink anyway. I grasped one of the wires and pulled hard, tearing it from the ceiling. I then quickly constructed a loop on one end for my neck and tied the other end the pipe. I stood on the head of one of the nukes with a wire tied around my neck.

I wonder if anyone was going to find my body before the submarine completely fails, killing everyone inside. I wonder if they would consider me smart for avoiding a painful death or a coward for not fighting until the last moment. Either way I didn’t care. I didn’t like anyone in this submarine. Actually I didn’t like anyone at all besides the creator of Lucky Charms. If there was a heaven, not that it mattered to me, I would eat Lucky Charms for eternity. With that thought I stepped forward.

There was a loud sound of crunching metal as I felt myself aggressively slide towards the floor. I fell on my ass. I looked up and saw the wire had completely crushed the pipe. Damnit, I tied the knot wrong. With a shock I realized the sirens and flashing lights had turned off. I heard the fast thud of several footsteps coming my direction. Within second the entire crew was standing in from of my with a look of awe. “How did you do it Jenkins? How do you fix the damned submarine.”

Before I could speak the lead engineer spoke for me. “It’s pretty simple. I don’t know how I didn’t think of it myself. He cut off power from the stray reactor by pulling that wire there and restricted air flow to that section of the sub to prevent the reactor from exploding. Well done Jenkins” I stood in disbelief. What the hell just happened. Am I in heaven?

The crew rushed forward and thanked me, some of them in tears. “I’m going to see my little boy again because of you. Thank you. What do you want for a meal. I’ll make whatever you want,” the chef said holding back tears.

“Ummm can I have a bowl of Lucky Charms.” The crew laughed. For once, people were laughing with me and not at me. The crew continued to bombard me with thank you’s as I made my way to the kitchen. I sat down where the chef had a bowl of Lucky Charms waiting for me.  Every bite has the perfect ratio of marshmallow to cereal. Right when I finished the chef made me another bowl. I felt as if my stomach could never get full.