December 1, 2017
By Anonymous


He found himself alone for the first time. He jumped and he screamed and he scanned, searching for a inkling of light. Searching for a way out, searching for the land that he knew existed. He’d never seen it but he knew it existed. He believed in it. In a room just barely large enough for him to lift his stubby arms above his head, he found himself throwing his body at the walls. Over and over again. If anyone was listening they would have heard nothing but “Ahh, ugh, ahh!” The grunts of a man determined to live but imprisoned by death. For years his groans had gone unheard but not today. Not today.
“Who’s that?” An unknown voice said.
At last he peered and was filled with light from above.  He screamed and jumped but this time for another reason. He had a new feeling, a feeling he never felt before. His chest burned and his stomach turned. He had no idea what he was feeling. Most on the outside would just call it anxiety.
“Do you need help?”
His head was swimming with confusion for a period of time, then he knew. He was being called by some higher power and not just any higher power but the ruler of land. Of paradise, of eden. He would be rescued, he would make it. His mind jumped to conclusions that a regular human’s mind would hardly perceive as anything but crazy theory, he saw it with certainty.
“Do you speak english?”
“Due-- yuuu--Speeek-- Eeeenglish?”
“Are you mocking me?”
“Arrrrr yuuu mahh kingg mee?”
“Get yourself out of that hole then!”
The oh so welcome light was dimming and he went into a frenzy he would not let the light leave him. Before despair could hit him he heard the sound of something dropping onto the muddy floor. It was his last hope so he lunged at it and gripped. He had lunged at hopes and wishes throughout his time but only this once did he grip. A look of surprise shattered his savage visage and he began to climb. He climbed and he climbed. The rough rope rubbed his hands bare but he continued to climb, this was the moment he had always dreamed of. In his dreams it had been darker. He pulled himself up with intense groans and strained muscles as his eyes narrowed into the light. Every tug he got a little closer and his eyes burned a little harder. Unwilling to give in, but totally out of strength, he took one final leap for freedom and missed.
His left arm scratched the dirty wall and his right arm flailed in the air but only for a second. Before he had time to utter another cry he was snatched by that right arm and catapulted onto the surface. For the first time, he was face to face with his savior. Karl was that savior from the city, he had a thick handlebars mustache that covered his cruelly twisted lips.
He wished he could have thanked him somehow but still he could not communicate.
“My name is Karl”
“Your name is Adolf”
All these sounds meant nothing to him at the time, but in time he would know. In time he would know those words with the certainty that he knew the land. Now he was focused on his new surroundings. He slowly rotated in circles, taking in all the new stimuli. There was a door to his left, a table to his right, and a chair neatly tucked into it. The walls were a drab grey and the ceiling was black. The only light in the room came from Karl’s flashlight. This was the most exciting thing Adolf had ever seen. He continued to spin and spin and spin until his head just couldn’t handle it anymore. A rat scurried across the room and he lost consciousness in the same second. He hadn’t even gotten a chance to study Karl yet, good thing he hadn’t for that may have caused his brain to combust. It’d be his first time seeing a human outside of his dreams. Adolf always had vivid dreams. His favorite was in a place called “New York.”

He was a man in NYC slinging oxygen to anybody with two eyes. 5 Dollars for the brown eyes, 10 for the blue.Often spiced by the odd screams of the junkie. “OH HOW GREAT LIFE IS OHH!” He didn’t know what those words meant but he knew they were sincere, and he knew they were of love.
Edward met a man one day on the corner of Huckle and Dupple named Dr. John who was tired of spending all day and night selling his homemade spoons just to make enough money to split a big mac with his dog every night. He saw Edward’s signature top hat with the blue feather delicately tucked in the band and begged for just one small hit of the captivating gas.
“Please sir may I have a capsule of your wares?”
“Do you have money?”
“Whatever you want, Please?!”
“Just 5 dollars.”
“But I don’t have 5 dollars!”
Edward’s nose crinkled in disgust, this broke maggot dared to disrespect him, the most business savvy man in the whole city treated like some kind of good will service?!
“I don’t have time for this.”
“No please, please, pleaseee!”
“Where do you stay? Maybe we can work something out”
“Oh you are so kind I knew you would come around! 7175 Crescent drive”
But Edward was not being kind at all. He headed to the bus stop right away with malicious schemes running through his mind. After waiting for five minutes he boarded the bus happy that he had timed it so well…
“Get off the bus”
“Thank you so very much my good sir”
Ahh the home of Dr John was a nice place indeed. Beautiful arches and pillars reminiscent of the ancient temples characterized his abode. He threw the door open and stepped inside with utter disrespect, his eyes instantly scanning for anything of value. To his surprise the house was full of all kinds of beautiful art, statues, and furniture. It was more than he could think about carrying so he just left a packet of oxygen on the ground, snatched an ornate ottoman and left. The front door left ajar as he lugged the old chair home.

Then he would be woke by the loud beeping of the alarms, immediately forgetting everything from his dream. It was a pleasurable experience, he’d wake with a smile on his face, the only time a smile was ever on his face.

Cold water collided with his face. He screamed. Karl simply laughed and propped him up against the wall in his humble cottage. Karl was an odd man with odd features but Adolf didn’t know that. He saw a caring creature, a thinking creature, a case of deja vu maybe. It was a human, the same creature from his dreams but he had no way of knowing that. He saw the shifty, cloudy eyes as eyes of generosity. He saw his crooked nose and thin lips twisted into a permanent snarl as the face of charity.
“Did you have a good nap?”
“Ruh Ruh?”
“You’ve been asleep for a month”
Adolf lost interest in the back and forth exchange of sound and instead turned his attention to the bright purple robe hanging on the corner of the book shelf. Oh the bookshelf, how important it would be to the development of poor Adolf. He had so much of his life taken away from him and only those books could attempt to repair the damage. The purple fascinated him. “Ahhh” The magnitude of the shelf combined with the plethora of books lined up in evenly rows grabbed his attention even harder than the flickering lamp on the dresser in the center of the room. His eyes flitted from side to side taking in everything. He would continue his spinning, but his legs were weakened and he could no longer stand.
“Now I will teach you”
“You will read, then you will speak, then you will lead.”
Karl pulled out a large green book from the shelf and his training had begun.

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