BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!
It’s 5:30 a.m. and the first thing I hear is my alarm going off.
“Get up Ani it’s time for school” is the next. Same as usual I roll over press snooze and go back to sleep.
“Okay now don’t surprised when I come in here with a bucket of water!”
I mimic what she says under the covers. It takes me a minute but I get up. My sister and I go through this every morning. I’ve been living with my sister ever since my mom kicked me out. She said I was a “distraction” and that her boyfriend doesn’t like when I’m there. I don’t really know why. I stay to myself go to school and come home, but that wasn’t enough. I was going to leave anyway. I’ve been saving up to get my own place since I started this job at Wendy’s freshman year. I’m a junior now. It seems like the same thing happens everyday I go to school come home go to work and come back home. I’ve never really experience a good childhood. I had to grow up fast.
“Hey girl,” said Niyah
“So they having this party on Saturday, tryna go?”
“Mhmm I don’t know, I don’t really like her like that. ”
“ Okay well let me know if you do.”
“Alright.” I said then we both went to class.
Niyah is my bestfriend but it wasn’t always like that. When I first met her we didn’t get along at all. I wanted to fight her so bad but I just convinced myself not to give my time to people I thought were ignorant. Little did I know we would be this close. I thought for a while about whether I should go to Keisha’s party or not. I mean I haven’t had a good time in a while maybe it’ll be fun. But then again I do need to work as many hours as I can if I plan on leaving, and plus I don’t want anything to go down. I really don’t like Keisha and her girls. They be talking a lot of stuff, and if she come at me crazy imma have to set her straight, but I guess I’ll go i’m just not going to pay her any mind.
I look at my phone and see Niyah calling me. I just know she’s about to ask me about this party.
Like I predicted she asked
“Soooo did you decide yet?”
“Yeah I guess I’ll go.”
“Great so I’ll be over at 10:00 to come get you.”
It’s 10:00 and Best Friend and I came through looking fly as the usual. I have on an open cut black dress that stopped above my knees and flowed down my legs in the back with some red heels, and a diamond necklace with the earrings to match. Niyah had on a Blue jean romper with hot pink heels and a gold necklace with gold bracelets to match.
At the party the music is blasting, everyone is dressed cute and having fun. It just started so not everyone has arrived yet. About an hour later the house is packed. It seems as if the whole school is here.
“Want to dance?” Chris asked. He had the silliest face. I love his goofiness.
I’ve always liked Chris. Ever since 7th grade when I saw how good he could play basketball. We’ve been friends for a while, and we relate to a lot of different things. Basketball is one. I never told him I liked him because I didn’t want to ruin our friendship.
“Remember when we were in 9th grade and slit eyebrows was popular?’’
“So you decided to try and slice your eyebrows; and ended up shaving them off.”
We take a minute and laugh.
“Oh my gosh that was soo funny; it took like two year for them to grow back.” I said laughing as loud as possible
“ Yeah I remember, but you still liked me though no eyebrows and all.”
We get quiet. I didn’t know he knew I liked him. Was it really that noticeable? As I began to say something I get interrupted with gunshots. BOOM BOOM BOOM!! Is all I hear.
“EVERYBODY GET DOWN NOW!” Some guys that live up the street did a drive by. I didn’t know them but I knew they were in a gang. The lights are off, and I’m terrified. People are trying to make as little noise as possible, but the gun shots are still there. I can’t believe this is happening. I can’t blame anyone but myself. I knew I shouldn’t have came. The two shots are aimed at me. Chris tries to block it but he couldn’t. It was too late. At that moment I knew that he was my real best friend and that he would do anything for me. Including die. I got shot in my stomach and leg. I try to get up and reach my phone to call my sister, but I can’t. I fall. I can hear what’s going on but I can’t see my surroundings.
“Call an ambulance!” I hear someone say, but I can’t really recognize the voice.
The ambulance finally arrives after 7 minutes. 7 minutes felt like forever. They rush me on the stretcher and all I hear is people screaming and Chris talking to the nurses telling them to let him get in the van, but they wouldn’t let him. I still can’t see anything but I feel the crowd. I can feel everyone watching. I can feel their worry. About 10 minutes after riding in the ambulance we arrive at the hospital. They rush me through the doors and began starting my surgery. I’m in a different place. This place is different. It’s peaceful. I don’t know where I’m at but I like it. I look up and I see the sun. I’m walking on clouds. As I continue to walk further I see a beautiful green garden with pink and yellow flowers with butterflies surrounding it. After admiring the garden I look up to see my grandmother. Wow this is amazing. I never want to go back. Why go back? To look at the scars, the memories, and the painful feelings I’ve been having since forever? No I don’t think so, but then I look down. I see my body just lying there. Helpless. It’s sad seeing myself like this. I see Chris laying there beside me crying and talking to me. Telling me to wake up. In my heart I want to but what good will it be? I heard the doctors tell my sister If I make it I’ll never be able to walk again. I don’t want to have to depend on anyone for the rest of my life. I don’t want to be a burden. I love being independent and me going back would kill that. I don’t want to have to need. I know everyone has needs but not this way. I would have so much resentment towards my mom. Why hasn’t she come to see me. Doesn’t she know what’s going on. Next I see my bestfriend Niyah she’s crying. She feels like it’s her fault for what's happening. I just want to go back for a little while to tell her it’s not. I love her. I would never blame her for anything that’s happened to me. I wake up to breathing mask on me and people surrounding me. Niyah was the first one to notice.
“Someone get a nurse.” I hear her yell. Nurses come rushing in and began doing treatment on me. I see Niyah and I try to talk to her but the words won’t come out. I feel weak and I don’t know how much longer I’m going to be here. She grabs me a whiteboard and marker and I write It’s not your fault on it. She begins to cry. This time was harder than before. I can see my Sister, Chris, and Niyah all there for me. This was my family and I loved them but I just couldn’t go back. I feel my eyes as they begin to close, but before they close I say “I love you guys.” BEEP! The heart monitor begins to go off and the line goes flat. I’M GONE.