February 1, 2017
By valkyrie1212 BRONZE, Adelaide, Other
valkyrie1212 BRONZE, Adelaide, Other
2 articles 0 photos 34 comments

Ahh, homework. Everyone's worst enemy. I sighed, staring at the maths book on my cluttered up desk. The rickety chair rocked with my every squirm as excuses after excuses piled up inside my head. Let's just say procrastination is everyone's second worst enemy.

"Sweetie, are you going to be okay?" Mum poked her head through the door, her uniform already on. She had an extra shift at the hospital tonight, which meant that I had to stay home alone yet again.

"I'll be fine, Mum." I smiled. "I'm used to it by now."

"Right, of course." She looked at me, her tired eyes etched with sadness. "Bye, darling. And clean your bedroom." She walked back downstairs, her steps heavy, as if she had a weight on her shoulders. Mum was carefree once upon a time.

I listened as the front door closed, then loaded up my laptop. Maths and cleaning would have to wait! The bedroom was an absolute mess. Clothes were strewn around the room, books were placed on every possible surface, and my desk! My hopeless, hopeless desk.

The homepage popped up on to the screen, filled with the day's best works. I typed in my email and password, my nails tapping against the keyboard. My account appeared, the books and details filling up the entire screen.

"Ten notifications!" I exclaimed excitedly. That was the most amount of notifications I ever got! I clicked on them, one by one. My smile started to fade. All of them were just people thanking me for my comments and likes. My stories still stayed on 0 views. It was good to be nice to people, but what's the point of submitting your story if no one's gonna read it?

I scowled, and clicked on the All Fiction button. A sea of stories popped up on the screen, and a smile started to appear on my face again. I settled down in my chair, and clicked on the first story.

The target seemed to glare at me. Its yellow bullseye glinted in the sunlight, reflecting straight into my eyes. The carnival worker was standing behind the counter, his bored eyes following my every move.

Not that I was moving.

I gripped the last dart in my sweaty hands. The sun was bearing down on me, making me squint. Shallow breaths escaped my dry lips. I raised my arm, the dart cradled inside my hand, and took a step...

Suddenly, the lights flickered. I glanced up towards the light bulb. It stopped flickering, but I frowned. It wasn't a windy or rainy night, so why would the light do that? I looked back down at the story, my mouth stretching wide into a yawn. It was 11:55pm, but I didn't feel like sleeping. I had to read some more. The chapter ended just as it was building up. I smiled, and started to comment.

@bartandarnie I really want to find out what happens ne-

The lights went out completely. I screamed, my eyes frantically looking around the room. My heart knocked against my ribs, like the beat of a drum. On screen, the bird blinked at me again.

"Calm down." I said loudly to myself. "There's just a blackout. It's fine." The laptop gave me some light, illuminating my messy room. I clicked on the next story, trying to bury myself back into the books. The lights should come on in a bit.




I jumped, my hands gripping the arm rest of the chair. I glanced around, my breathing quickening once again. What was that? The noise stopped. I quickly looked back at the laptop, whispering the story aloud in a vain attempt to calm myself. My voice echoed through the room, the meaningless words bouncing right back at me. I let out a long sigh. The tap was probably just a branch from our orange tree outside. I glanced at the tree in the garden, making sure my reasoning was plausible.

Suddenly, the leaves out in the verandah started moving, making those soft crinkling sounds. Except...there was no wind. I stared at the leaves, my mouth slowly widening. They started moving closer and closer to the house. My heart thundered in my ears as I grabbed my phone, my hands fumbling to dial the number in.

"Mum...please, please pick up." I gasped, tears forming in my eyes. "Mum!"


"Mum! Please come home, please come home..." I repeated again and again into the phone, my voice breaking.

"What's wrong?" Mum asked, her voice sounding worried.

"The lights went out, a-and there was a tapping noise and the leaves are moving but there's no wind and-" I yelled, tears streaming down my face. "Come home, please."

"Darling, it's okay. The lights will come on in a sec, okay? The tapping's probably just our orange tree." Mum sighed. Over the line, there were people yelling in pain. "Darling, I have to go. Just go to bed, I really need to treat these people." She hung up. I dropped the phone. Sobs ripped out of my throat, my tears dripping to the floor. I clenched the arm rest again, my knuckles white.

Out of my peripheral vision, I saw movement. I glanced up slowly, and looked outside the window. Tap. Tap. I screamed, falling backwards onto the ground, my eyes never leaving the spot where the hand was tapping against the window. It disappeared as soon as I saw it, but it was there.

"Somebody help me!" I screamed, my voice choking up. I wrapped my arms around my knees, my vision blurry from the tears. I tried to catch my breath, my sweaty hands clutching together. The nails dug into my palms, leaving little red marks.

Suddenly, the hairs on the back of my neck stood up. I could sense it. That all too familiar feeling everyone gets when a person is looking at them. I stopped breathing, my eyes wide with terror.

I slowly turned around.

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This article has 9 comments.

on Mar. 28 at 10:00 am
WolfWhisperer0911 DIAMOND, Crosby, Texas
58 articles 0 photos 794 comments

Favorite Quote:
"For I command you, be brave and steadfast! For the Lord your God will be with you whenever you go."
-Joshua 1:9

"Throw me to the wolves, and I'll return leading the pack."- Unknown

"Never moon a werewolf." -Mike Binder

@valkyrie1212 Great job! This is a story that I put my money in if this was a novel. Oh, and thank you for answering my forum for short stories.

hwoodruff98 said...
on Apr. 12 2017 at 8:40 pm
hwoodruff98, Lititz, Pennsylvania
0 articles 0 photos 60 comments
Oops no it*

hwoodruff98 said...
on Apr. 12 2017 at 8:39 pm
hwoodruff98, Lititz, Pennsylvania
0 articles 0 photos 60 comments
I liked this piece. I thought it was cool how the actions in the story paralleled the story the main character was reading. Your writing style was good, and you were easily able to build suspense and it draw me in. Just a really quick mechanical edit: In paragraph seven, I would phrase it like this: "That was the greatest amount of notifications I had ever gotten!" Or if you want a stronger word than "gotten," you could say received." This is a great self-contained piece, but I would be interested in reading more if you decide to continue it. Keep writing!

on Mar. 17 2017 at 3:18 am
valkyrie1212 BRONZE, Adelaide, Other
2 articles 0 photos 34 comments
@missfloetry thank you so much! :))

on Mar. 15 2017 at 7:01 pm
missfloetry SILVER, Forest Park, Illinois
7 articles 1 photo 25 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Don't mistake my kindness for weakness. I am kind to everyone, but when someone is unkind to me, weak is not what you are going to remember about me."
-Al Capone, American Gangster

Excellent writing! You should definitely submit more work.

on Feb. 27 2017 at 2:02 am
valkyrie1212 BRONZE, Adelaide, Other
2 articles 0 photos 34 comments
Thank you so much, that means a lot to me!

surya_k BRONZE said...
on Feb. 26 2017 at 6:59 am
surya_k BRONZE, Chennai, Other
1 article 0 photos 18 comments

Favorite Quote:
A reader lives a thousand lives before he dies ... The man who never reads lives only one. - George R R Martin

I just released a breath I didn't realize I was holding

on Feb. 12 2017 at 4:35 am
valkyrie1212 BRONZE, Adelaide, Other
2 articles 0 photos 34 comments
@Carstairs thank you very much

Carstairs said...
on Feb. 11 2017 at 10:45 am
Carstairs, Hillman, Michigan
0 articles 0 photos 8 comments

Favorite Quote:
“One must always be careful of books and what is inside them, for words have the power to change us.” Cassandra Clare

This is really good. I feel bad for not commenting on people's work, and just posting on the comments that they make. I love the cliffhanger. PLEASE POST MORE WORK!!!!!

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